I have been with my DH for almost 10 years and feel we have reached the end. We both moved to a new area 200 miles away from where we used to live and bought a house. However we just do not get on anymore and either row all the time or ignore each other. He has a bad temper and his favourite words to me at present are shut up or f*ck off. He has never hit me but kicked me once and has pushed me, though not for a while. He says I make him lose his temper and that I nag too much. Our evenings are spent with him on the pc and me watching telly in another room
He has friends at work but I only have one friend here and desperatly want to move back to our old area to be near my friends. He also has family support whereas my family are distant and live miles away from both areas. I want to sell the house and move back but know as soon as I mention this he will make life really difficult and I can't handle it. I already do the majority of housework, sort all our finances out as he can't and work full time, plus I am struggling with anxiety and a crippling phobia so anything else I feel will break me.
We have already talked about doing essential work to the house in order to sell it so we can move back...would it be horrible of me not to mention wanting to leave until the ball is rolling? Ideally I would move back with DD and go to university to study to be an occupational therpaist even if this means living on benefits for a while until I am sorted out.
I am just scared of the practicalities and if I will regret this. What if my phobia and anxiety gets worse when we split up? How would I cope for money? How would I organise moving back? I can't picture being with him for ever and I can't picture a life without him as we have been together since I was eighteen, but we have no relationship and haven't slept together for months. Also DD sees us row a lot and I want her to live in a house where rows are not happenning all the time
Can anyone advise me?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
So Very Scared
mumtochloe · 04/08/2005 15:00
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