A bit controversial, I guess, however its something I wanted to ask after something a colleague said. Basically, she admitted a big part of what attracted her to her new(ish) partner is the fact he professed to admiring her intelligence (she has a Masters degree, he left school at 16) and the fact she felt she could "really make a difference to his life" (he was unemployed and living with his ex on a council estate when she met him). Her previous relationship, which she finished to see this new guy, was actually pretty egalitarian - she has nothing but praise for her ex and it struck me how that's often seen as the ideal on these Boards. Yet, it wasn't what she wanted. Her new guy doesn't really contribute as much as her ex and is much more the traditional male "emotionally reticent" type (e.g. sulks when he gets upset rather than communicates) but this really doesn't seem to bother her (though I guess, with her ex providing a lot of child care, she doesn't need as much help)!
Then there's another friend, who seems to always date guys where there's some kind of "mothering" involved. The first had serious phobias, the second was a student 15 years her junior and the last was significantly on the ASD spectrum.
I'm not judging their choices - I know love is blind, etc - but it just struck me how these (and other) women seemed to actually prefer and seek out men that would be labelled "cocklodgers" or a "manchild" on these Boards. And, when I see all the complaints here about these types of men, how few decent men there are, how many posts to "LTB", etc I just find myself completely baffled as to why? Do some people just prefer to be the one playing a more parental role in a relationship? And is that necessarily wrong?
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Relationships
Do you prefer a partner you can "save"?
Anonanonon · 22/01/2021 00:01
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