I've had a friend for five years now. We're very different people, but we got along well and I loved who she was. She was great during some tough times I had. I think I was a good friend, or at least a decent one -- I traveled to support her at her career events, wrote stuff for her website, etc.
About midway through my pregnancy, a year and a half ago, I felt she was a bit off she promised to organise my baby shower but left it so late some of my friends couldn't come, she texted me less often. I figured she was busy or just had a lot on. My son was born, she seemed OK for a bit, and then, in January last year, she forgot my birthday. Normally I don't give a toss if my friends don't remember my birthday but we were very close and it hurt, especially in the light of the other stuff. I told her I was really upset and felt like she was disinterested in me or something was off with us she apologised and I figured that was that.
But she seemed to contact me less and less last year. I've been so sad about it. In August she told me she was divorcing her husband. The pandemic meant I could only help her in a limited way, but I still sent my exceptionally lonely husband round to take her heavier stuff to her new place. I tried texting her to check in with her but she hardly ever responded so I stopped. In October we had to isolate, and when I texted her she didn't even ask if we needed anything, despite the fact my house is on her way home.
We met up one time in October (at my invite), but I haven't heard from her since. She's (obviously) very upset about her divorce. January rolled around, she forgot my birthday again (texted me two later and wished me happy birthday for the wrong day). Something in me just broke. I'm done. I don't want to be her friend anymore.
Would it be terrible to just not text her anymore, to just let it die? I feel torn because she's going through a tough time, but I feel like something's been wrong for a year and a half, and that's a long time.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Friendship has been dying for a long time but friend is having a tough time.
thisisadiana84 · 16/01/2021 23:30
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