Things aren't great between me and DP. Mainly my fault for having insecurities from the start I still can't shake. Things did get good (or perhaps I told myself they were) and we went on to have a baby. DP is due to see his older children today and I know I'm going to be expected to be around with the baby so they can see their sibling. However, I'm feeling so suffocated at the moment I don't want to be here and I'm dreading today. If I'm not around I'm going to make the situation worse. I always feel so tense on the weekends (nothing to do with the children). I hate them.
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