I don't know how to deal with this and could really use some advice.
Yesterday night I got a message from DHs ex informing me they'd had a conversation on the phone and exchanged texts. He is away for work, we had had an argument on the phone. I tried to call back and his phone was engaged. When he rang back he wouldn't say who he spoke to but said he called someone so he wouldn't have to speak to me. I now know that it was her.
There is a bit of a back story with her, she has been a bit of a bunny boiler even though they broke up years before DH and i even met. But i have always made it clear to him that it was his job to establish boundaries and he agreed he would have no contact with her. I could tell from her messages she knew she was causing trouble, and was loving it.
We have had a hard time recently, things are quite stressful. I am also pregnant. Our relationship is usually great, he is a great dad to my son from a previous relationship. He has never, to my knowledge, cheated.
Last night I was mostly in shock. I sent him a screenshot of the message and he immediately apologised and said he knows he's fucked up and done the wrong thing. He has said he's in a bad place and just wanted to talk to someone else. I've told him i need time to process it.
I don't know what to do now. Worse things could have happened but I still feel humiliated and I don't know if I can trust him. He admitted he doesn't know if he would have told me if she hadn't messaged me so is he only sorry because i found out?
I do want to move forward. I love him so bloody much. I just don't know how to deal with this. Please if anybody has any advice i'd really appreciate it.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
How do you move on from feeling betrayed?
BabyLord · 22/10/2017 12:29
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