Thank you in advance for any advice you can give.
My DP and I are not married. Two young dc.
I earn more than DP; I have a pension and savings.
DP earns slightly less, contributes proportionally much less to the household, has only just started a pension and has no savings. Early on in our relationship when we began living together, bills he had been in charge of paying were often paid late and went to red warnings. It put the fear of god into me and I ended up taking over nearly all the bill paying.
Our relationship is unbalanced financially and is something I am trying to begin to sort out. I am very sensible with money and like to save. DP isn’t reckless but rarely knows how much money he has and he definitely feels he ‘pays his share’. He doesn’t. After his one small bill, his salary is spent on himself. After my many bills, my money is spent on non ‘bill’ family stuff - DC clothes, DC clubs, holidays etc. I don’t have any money left to save.
The current set up of me paying much more bills than him 90% to his 10%, despite only earning 10% more than him is making me feel very stressed and resentful.
We have separate bank accounts.
Neither of us have a will.
Our house is in our joint names. But I put down all the deposit from my careful saving in my twenties and a small inheritance. He received an inheritance in his twenties, before we met, and blew it all on frivolous things.
I am feeling quite distant from him at the moment. I’m hoping this will pass. Maybe it will. Or maybe we may one day break up.
If we did, I would live with the children I am sure.
So basically, is there anything I need to do financially to look after myself financially and secure the best financial situation for our children.
I realise I may sound smug and possibly unfair towards DP. I feel like he has had ten years of profiting from my savings and earnings and low responsibilities regarding life admin.
In other ways he’s a good DP and DF.
With the current situation what’s the worse that could happen financially if we did break up?
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Relationships
Not married, financially what's the worse that can happen?
EllyOlly · 17/10/2017 03:22
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