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Is it weird to have only ever slept with one man?

(53 Posts)
NotANewbie Thu 27-Oct-16 11:30:14

(I was thinking about this last night, and namechanged to ask, but fell asleep before I got to start the thread. In the cold light of day this feels a weird topic to broach, but as I'm wondering whether I'm weird, I'll do so anyway.)

It seems to me as if everyone on MN has had multiple partners/relationships. I know that MN is not a reliable cross-section of people, but still, it makes me wonder...

Am I weird that I have only ever had sex with my dh? I was a virgin when we met in my late 20s, simply because I had never met anyone I wanted in a physical way. So much so, that, until I had my first enjoyable snog in my mid 20s, I didn't even know whether I was hetero or gay.

ladyformation Thu 27-Oct-16 11:32:24

It's unusual but not weird! As long as you're happy, who cares?

MancKitten Thu 27-Oct-16 11:32:35

No. I only slept with my DH will my mid 30s.

We divorced and now I have a new partner but for a long time I had only slept with him

Funny because most of the people who had slept with a lot of people used to tell me they wished they had found 'the one' first time round and how special it seemed.

I suppose it's a case of greener grass.

MiddleClassProblem Thu 27-Oct-16 11:34:34

I don't think any number is weird. There's an average number, no idea what it is but that doesn't mean that's normal. I wouldn't judge anyone who has slept with 0 people nor the other end of the spectrum.

MeganBacon Thu 27-Oct-16 11:35:11

I'm sure there is a very wide range of "normal". It's less than average but so what? It's still "normal". Some people want more partners, others less, all fine.

yesterdaysunshine Thu 27-Oct-16 11:36:05

I've only ever slept with DH. I was young when we met though.

Chansey Thu 27-Oct-16 11:39:52

Until my divorce I was the same and I was perfectly happy with that situation. Unfortunately my now ex did not feel the same way and decided shagging my (obviously not) best friend was the way to go.

BadRespawn Thu 27-Oct-16 11:40:15

Only one sexual partner here, too. Don't feel remotely like I've missed out either, as we have great compatibility and a similar degree of... adventurousness wink

AyeAmarok Thu 27-Oct-16 12:04:03

It's not typical to not have had sex until your late 20s.

Some people are more sexual than others. Sometimes people meet someone and just have great chemistry with them, it's just chance that you didn't until your late twenties, probably. Chemistry is a great thing, I'd say it's a shame to have had to go without it so long but it doesn't sound like you mind at all.

Some people meet their future husband at 16 so will probably only ever have slept with one person. Others don't get that luck until they are 40.

MyBreadIsEggy Thu 27-Oct-16 12:16:01

I've only ever had sex with my DH.
I was a 16 year old virgin when I met him, he wasn't a virgin though. We didn't wait until we were married, but I love that he's the only person I've shared such an intimate part of myself with.

PoldarksBreeches Thu 27-Oct-16 12:19:14

0 isn't weird. 1 isn't weird. 100 isn't weird. As long as you're happy with your choices then it's not weird.

Lumpylumperson Thu 27-Oct-16 12:20:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wineandcheeseplease Thu 27-Oct-16 12:21:59

I've only ever slept with my DH

Tarttlet Thu 27-Oct-16 12:29:49

Are you happy with your choices? If so, then that's all that matters.

christmaswreaths Thu 27-Oct-16 12:37:00

Who cares as long as your are happy?

I haven't ever counted how many men I slept with, it felt right at the time..

ErrolTheDragon Thu 27-Oct-16 13:00:15

Not weird at all. I met DH at uni, 37 years ago, we've been married 30. I'd had a couple of boyfriends in the sixth form but back then 'going out' was likely to mean just that rather than staying in!

TheNaze73 Thu 27-Oct-16 13:01:12

The only weird thing, would be anyone judging it.

weegiemum Thu 27-Oct-16 13:02:37

DH and I met when I was 18 and he was 19. We've both only slept with each other, and 25 years later we're both very happy with that!

whattodowiththepoo Thu 27-Oct-16 13:04:04

Yes it is very very very weird if you have children by different fathers or if you have been married 3+ times to different men.

Polkadotties Thu 27-Oct-16 13:09:59

I wouldn't say it's weird.
However, I've slept with some men who were absolutely awful in bed and I know they are awful compared to others who have been amazing. If I had only slept with one of the rubbish ones I would have perceived that to be normal

maras2 Thu 27-Oct-16 13:19:59

It feels lovely and very special.We were 16 and 19 now were 63 and 66.It feels right for us but I would never judge anyone elses choices.

Daisies123 Thu 27-Oct-16 13:25:25

No, only ever slept with my DH- met him when I was 29! Don't think it's weird at all. He was my tenth boyfriend.

katiegg Thu 27-Oct-16 13:31:25

As others have said, it's maybe unusual but not weird. I've only ever had sex with my husband.

Every1lovesPatsy Thu 27-Oct-16 13:31:38

It's not weird.

My experience since I split up with my ex-husband is I have slept with 25-30 men and I really enjoyed sleeping with different men because it opened my eyes to the different techniques, pleasures, sparks, chemistry that you can have with different people.

I thoroughly enjoyed having casual sex and different sexual partners, some were not that satisfying and others were surprisingly satisfying (and I suppose vice versa).

I think to each their own, but how do people know they are 100 % happy if there is no barometer or no comparison ?? I don't really get that, I know we can all work on different techniques etc, but for me it has been really helpful to try out different partners too.

RattieOfCatan Thu 27-Oct-16 13:34:12

Whattodo grin

It's unusual but I wouldn't say weird. In the same way that it's unusual for people to have had a lot of ONSs but nobody that they've been with more than once.

Though admittedly I think I would wonder whether my experience of sex was normal with my partner, in a similar way to how I wonder about sex with a woman; I've never slept with a woman though I am bisexual, I just happened to never have a girlfriend.

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