Being contacted by someone I know on dating site

[wonderstuff100]

He is single,his wife died. I twigged who he was last year when he popped up on my matches and since then when we pass each other dropping and collecting the kids off at after school/breakfast club,I thought we were avoiding speaking/eye contact due to us both seeing each other on this site.

NOW he messaged me last night having rejoined a few days ago,I go along thinking he knows it's me. Then he asks me how old my children are. When his son was at my son's birthday last week! The man came into my house,the pictures on my profile look like me,we've seen (and,I thought,purposefully,ignored each other weekly for the past year!),how can he possibly not know it's me!!

So is it that he genuinely doesn't know it's me,or is embarrassed and wants me to say it first?!

Answers on a postcard please!

[Whisky2014]

I think he doesn't know it's you.

So what ya gona do, do you like him?

[loobyloo1234]

I think he does know you ... but is trying to play it cool. Message him

[ElsaAintAsColdAsMe]

He is probably trying to suss out if it is you or someone who looks like you.

Block of you don't fancy him so he can't see you and just carry on as normal, never mentioned it.

If you do fancy him tell him it's you and go from there.

[wonderstuff100]

I do like him and he lives round the corner,really convenient if you're both single parents. But surely if he doesn't know it's me,and I tell him it is,that's mega awkward. This man's son is quite a good friend with my son but I held off inviting him for playdates as was embarrassed at having seen him online. Now if I mention it to him,and he didn't realise,mega awkward for me! But as I said,the man was in my house last weekend picking up his child,we had a brief exchange of words,how can he not know this is me! I even had the same hair do on Sunday as in my picture online!

[loobyloo1234]

Why don't you just say 'oh very funny. Did your DS have fun at the party for (my DS) last week? It was good seeing you'

Less awks?

[Whisky2014]

I prob would reply with something to say he does know you. But also ask him out! Wooo

[wonderstuff100]

I'm thinking if he doesn't realise,I could drop enough hints about DS for the penny to drop. Then feign ignorance still!

[wonderstuff100]

I agree, it's tough. Mine are 7 and 9 so we have similar challenges!! My weekends are spent watching endless football matches and training! Lol. Are you just looking for something casual at the minute?

That was his last message. I'm now convinced he doesn't know it's me! I'll just have to leave it I suppose!

[pattimayonnaise]

I'm sorry but how could he not know its you?! I'd be thinking he's a bit of an idiot if he pays that little attention to people he sees on a regular basis. How weird!

[Whisky2014]

I think I'd just make it clear he knows you? You could mention your son and his sons name?

[MyKingdomForBrie]

Urgh, fishing for no strings anyway. I'd just ignore him.

[loobyloo1234]

'Ive just realised who you are ... it clicked when you said your sons are 7 & 9. Thought I recognised you, I'm 'DS' mother'

[wonderstuff100]

No strings isn't neccessarily a bad thing if you're both comfortable with it. We both don't have another person to co-parent with,work full time...it can be really hard getting time by yourself,let alone a date!

[mayhew]

Some people are very poor at recognising faces from images. I have often failed to recognise celebrities in shops and restaurants! I believe it is more common for men.

Just send a straightforward friendly message. Say it would be nice to meet but you understand if it would be awkward.

I wouldn't be married now if I hadn't directly asked my husband out. 6 months of hinting passed entirely unnoticed.

[wonderstuff100]

Well I kept messaging to see what happened. And it got a bit flirty. Then he told me his name to which I had to respond with mine,which is very unusual as it's Irish. And he also had an invite and a text sent to him recently with my name on it. So if he doesn't put 2+2 together now....

[wonderstuff100]

Nice to meet you, I have heard that name once before. Are you Irish or just your name?

This guy is either really odd or yanking my chain!

[PlanBwastaken]

Yanking your chain, surely!

[Whisky2014]

Just say "you know you know me, yeah?"

[wonderstuff100]

I honestly can't tell! I feel like I'm playing poker and we're trying to figure out who's bluffing!

[Somerville]

This gets more and more awkward the longer you (both?!) go on pretending not to recognise the other!

[KittensandKnitting]

He has to be yanking your chain!! I think he sounds a bit weird to be honest but if it floats your boat go for it just tell him "ok let's stop this now I know you know it's me"

Won't no stings be awkward if he's your sons mates dad?

[wonderstuff100]

Yeah but it's gone so far now I can't admit that I know him! He'll have to concede first!

[Muddlewitch]

Is it definitely him and not a doppelgänger? Does his profile give information that matches with what you know about him?

[KittensandKnitting]

Just grow some balls woman and tell him you know followed by let's get a drink