I had extensive abdominal surgery last Friday, and came out of hospital on Sunday. My DP took Mon & Tues off work to look after me, and since then my Mum has been helping out.
DP works Saturdays, but has next Sunday and Monday off. So he's just announced that he wants to go and do his hobby next Sunday dependent on how well I am. If I still need care, he'll stay home and care for me, but if I'm well enough to be left alone, he'll go out for the day.
I got upset ,and said that he's basically saying he'll be with me if he has to, but if he doesn't have to, he's off. I said that I'm home alone all day every day from now on, and it would have been nice for him to want to be with me to cheer me up. He said "don't expect me to hang around with you for the next 4 weeks" (the amount of time I'm likely to be off sick) and "I'm not the one who has had an operation", and "your family don't want to be with you, so you should be used to it".
He thinks that by offering to spend the day with me on Monday, that's plenty and I'm being selfish expecting him to give up his Sunday for me as well.
I think that he ought to actually want to be with me, to see me happy and to cheer me up. Am I the selfish one?
I'm lying in bed sobbing, less than a week post op, while he snores next to me.
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Relationships
Am I selfish to expect DP to spend time with me after operation?
HospitalHassler · 03/06/2016 00:03
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