Hi everyone.
Regulars here will know I have posted before about the struggles I've had with the relationship I am in, but things seem to have got a lot better and my DP has demonstrated a lot more commitment towards me and our relationship. I think his casual-ness approach to 'us' was because he was in a long-term relationship with someone who only moved out of their home about 2 or 3 months before our relationship began. I, on the other hand, had been single for about 3 years apart from a casual matey type relationship I had with someone I would regard as more of a friend.
I think I'm looking for outside, onlooker's thoughts on my current situation and maybe give me a reality check!
When we are together, he is completely doting, loving, seems completely genuine when he says he loves and adores me. In terms of commitment, he has planned for him and his daughter to come to mine for Christmas, has said he wants me to go with him to visit his family of the Christmas period and we have even just booked a 10 day holiday to The Maldives together! So I know he is serious and thinking long-term. We rode my motorbike to his house today to put it away for the winter and he talks about us going out riding together again in the spring time - so he is definitely thinking into the future.
We live about 35-40 miles away from each other and both have busy jobs. Here's the thing. We only seem to see each other at weekends. As early as we can on a Friday and I, or he, leaves the other on a Sunday afternoon to sort kids/work out for the next day.
We initially met in January, dated for about 3 or 4 months before we became 'exclusive' and we declared love for each other for the first time in July.
My thing is that I would like to see him more often than this. I suggested a month or so ago that we had a week day 'date night' where we would take it in turns to stay at one of the other's house. He seemed to happily agree provided he didn't have a difficult day with travel/work commitments the next day and we saw each other on the Wednesday that week. Since then, it hasn't happened. Every time he says he is shattered/stressed, or has to be in London the next day and needs to prepare etc. I do get this, but it would be nice if he made an effort to see me another night instead. I left his house this afternoon and he has not mentioned seeing me during the week at all and I don't know whether to bring it up. I seem to be the one to, once it gets to Tuesday evening, ask on the phone if we are seeing each other the next day and I feel I am starting to sound like a stuck record always with the same reply.
Am I asking too much at this stage? Being too needy? Or should he be making the effort to see me more than just at weekends? We haven't talked about the future in terms of living together or anything yet and I'm not too bothered really as I have two DD's that I couldn't just up-root and he needs to be near his work and his own DD. But, can our relationship progress the way it is? Should I just be happy with the wonderful, fantastic relationship we do have when we are together and look forward to the future? (although I don't know if his idea of the future is the same as mine!)
Thanks for taking the time to read this and respond. I find it so helpful to get all the different responses
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Am I wrong to want/expect to see my man more than just at weekends?
excitedbutscared · 01/12/2014 00:13
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.