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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

He wants to... i do too, but....

36 replies

lovecognac · 01/10/2011 22:09

I have been together with my DH for many years, we love each other. He has mentioned anal sex in the past and i often think about it too. I just do not know how we can start it ? I know i need lubrication, but i am tense about it hurting. Has anyone advice/ experience they can share with me please.

OP posts:

Report

thisisyesterday · 01/10/2011 22:10

ffs it's saturday today, not friday! i'm afraid yo'll have to wait a week, everyone knows tha friday is bumsex night on MN!

Ayoop · 01/10/2011 22:10

You're a night too late, love

LeBOF · 01/10/2011 22:10

I think you might be on the wrong site. Nobody ever talks about that here.

madonnawhore · 01/10/2011 22:11

Can't believe you've opened the bumsex floodgates on a Saturday.

Lots of lube and take it really slow ime.

stripeybump · 01/10/2011 22:12

You can watch X Factor on catch-up instead

snoopdogg · 01/10/2011 22:16

Shit! (oh, soz.....) thought I'd lost a whole day. My teenager's upstairs wireless-less so it's not him - time for a headcount mummys?

stretch · 01/10/2011 22:29

Glass or two of wine, tons of lube, and you be in control, not him.

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 01/10/2011 22:30

Your post is definitely one for nethuns and, after the deed is done, it'll be obligatory for you to create a ticker showing 'x hours, x minutes, x seconds since I had bumsex'.

However, abeit it's the wrong night, since you're here I'll go so far as to tell you that I suspect the hunnies will suggest you relax and make sure he uses plenty of Anchor butter lube. I also suspect they'll advise him to curb his enthusiasm in favour of a 'gently does it' approach - and to use a condom that he can remove should bumsex leads to penetration of the more favoured hole without allowing for a bidet break.

Of course, I could be entirely wrong and a couple of caring hunnies may invite you round in RL so that you and dh can be shown the right and wrong way to do it. If you arrive to find pampas grass growing in the front garden, you're best advised to make your excuses and head for the hills home - and if you drop anything on the floor before you leave the premises fgs don't bend down to pick it up

ChippingIn · 01/10/2011 22:33

You lot are not helping her are you?! (well, except for stretch & I spat my name out at the irony of that!)

Try doing an Active Search - there should be plenty of info in there!

If you are tense at the thought of it, it's not going to go very well is it - you need to either embrace the idea & relax or decide it's not for you.

madonnawhore · 01/10/2011 22:34

Oh yes, v. important: use a condom and no switching holes without taking it off first.

No A to M either cos that's just gross.

RebelFromTheWaistDown · 01/10/2011 22:36

Dirty bastard

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 01/10/2011 22:37

You don't exactly live up to your name then, Rebel?

RebelFromTheWaistDown · 01/10/2011 22:43

I'm all mouth and no trousers izzy!

billysolloxx · 01/10/2011 22:49

woohoo bumsex!! no it doesnt hurt aslong as you take it slow and make sure you relax.
Good luck its good to try new things.

squeakytoy · 01/10/2011 22:50

I would say almost all men ask for it.... almost every one of them fully expects the answer to end with "off" and the first words are not normally "get em"..... :)

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 01/10/2011 22:51

You're ideally dressed for the occasion then, Rebel

lovecognac · 01/10/2011 22:51

Thanks to those who replied with helpful advice. I never thought we would need a condom, is that only incase we reverted to vaginal sex or some other reason ? I am researching the options but by now DH is probably fast asleep!

OP posts:

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy · 01/10/2011 22:53

A skilled lover has no need to 'ask'... squeaky

stretch · 02/10/2011 18:57

Lovecognac, i would recommend a condom. Personally, the feeling of semen in your..erm....bumhole is not pleasant!

And thanks chippingIn! May have to change my name

ChaoticAngelofSamhain · 02/10/2011 19:06

Have to agree with ChippingIn, wrt stretch's name/post, although I'm still trying to work out how she spat her name out

madonnawhore · 02/10/2011 19:06

If he doesn't use a condom, he can get a nasty UTI. And so could you if he went straight from the back door to the front door without having a good wash in between.

bran · 02/10/2011 19:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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madonnawhore · 02/10/2011 19:11

Yes, that too. Don't wear white trousers afterwards, put it that way!

Pinot · 02/10/2011 19:13

Why on earth do you want a cock up your arse? Ewwwwwwww!

Annie421 · 02/10/2011 19:16

I always think there is something not quite right with a man that wants anal sex ... not sure why you would want it either?!

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