After a very up & down 18 months last night was the final straw. My, now ex, bf has 3 sons from a previous relationship but as there was domestic violence & drug abuse inthe relationship they were taken from their mum & have lived with their maternal grandmother for the last 3 years. When i met my ex I did not know the full story & it was very much that the boys were 'lost' by his ex it is only as court action has taken place as she is trying to get them back that I have read court papers etc that make things more clear. They had broken up prior to them being removed former care & he had been caring for his dying dad but IMO that is not an excuse for abandoning your sons with a junkie & the violence & drug use on his part had occurred previously anyway. Afaik he is now clean although there have been slips according to drug tests I have found in court papers which he has asked me to read. Our relationship has been up & down but I am currently 4 months pregnant & had really been up recently. Yesterday he had court to do with his sons as he us trying to gain access & whilst there his sons social worker told him she had been informed that I am pregnant & to let me know she would be contacting me. When he told me this I was mortified, I have 2 children & am a very good mum & the thought of social services being involved in my babies life did upset me as I have never done anything wrongwith regards to my kids. When he came here later on we started to discuss this & I was obviously upset but he just said it wasn't his fault. I argued that it was hardly mine & why should I be paying because he & his ex were junkies. He was shouting at me that it wasn't his fault because he was with his dad etc & I said that he had let his boys down but he wouldn't have that & got very verbally abusive telling me I was a slag who sleeps with everyone etc. I told him to get out, it is my flat. He stays sometimes & gives me money towards his food & me doing his washing but the flat is mine, I pay all the bills etc. He was saying no give him money first & I said if he didn't leave I would call the police. He said I would have to as he wasn't leaving til he got his baby out of me. I was attacked by my ex when pregnant with my DD so this terrified me. I called 999 & managed to lock myself in the bathroom. My DD, 8, was outside with her friend & I shouted at her to go next door to friends house. He was banging on the door & shouting at me then when he heard me talking to the police went downstairs & calmly started to play football with neighbours kids so when police arrived he could make me out to be crazy pregnant woman & he was a saint. They spoke to us, I packed some if his clothes in a bag & they sent him on his way. I will have to have some contact as he has more stuff here but am going to insist he sends someone else to collect it. I have taken him back before but not this time but could do with some support right now because I just feel awful.
Thank you to anyone that has read this far, I am sorry it is so long x
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Got rid of him but I am pregnant.
26 replies
Squiglettsmummy2bx · 25/08/2011 02:33
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.