I was supposed to be unable to have kids. Apparently. So I was very surprised when I discovered I was pregnant. Moreover, I'm about 10 or 11 weeks, so I've been pregnant for a while without knowing.
I would have been utterly and totally delighted if it wasn't for the fact that I'm now terrified that I've done irreperable damage through alcohol.
I've not been drunk over the last few months, but I've definitely consumed alcohol every day. And quite a lot, too. My alcohol tolerance is very high and always has been. I'm a writer, so I keep odd hours and often lose track of day and night, so I can end up having the odd whiskey at weird hours most days, and a bottle of wine a couple of days a week. Obviously, not any more! But there is no escaping from the reality that I have unwittingly put the child at incredible risk.
I have an appointment booked for Monday for a pre-check at an abortion clinic (that's the only way I can get a scan quickly), but I reeeeeeeeeally don't want to terminate the pregnancy. On the other hand, I couldn't live with myself if I brought a child into the world with irreperable damage. Additionally, my husband has said that he couldn't live with me if our child was born with FAS due to my negligence, so it's a tricky situation all round 
I've been trying to research FAS, but am finding loads of conflicting data. My GP simply said "there's no way of knowing". I'm wondering whether anyone here has any useful experiences that they could share that might be a bit more helpful?
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Pregnancy
accidentally drinking a LOT in the first few weeks...
kkwi82 · 08/05/2012 20:33
Oh luv, I really empathise: I found out I was pregnant at 17 weeks and had been drinking plenty right up until the day before 
Stopped immediately, but then the guilt and worry kicks in 
As far as I've been told and read, FAS is caused by excessive drinking throughout the pregnancy (and I'm holding on to this), not just at the beginning, but I'm no expert.
When I've spoken to my registrar, his attitude was non-judgmental and he said basically, what's done is done. We now have to focus on a healthy pregnancy from this point.
I know it's hard, but before HPTs this must have happened to lots of women, no?
I WILL worry until baby arrives safely (32 weeks now), but I didn't know I was pregnant and there's nothing more I can do about it.
I had my DD when i was 19, i went to the doctors for a pregnancy test and was told i wasn't pregnant. Now, i was 19 and split from the father. So i went out "celebrating" my non pregnancy with my friends and probably drunk the best part of a bottle of pernod 
, i obviously continued to drink until i found out I was pregnant at 20 weeks
My beautiful, healthy, intelligent DD is 21 now :)
on your behalfDP's ex apparently put down the first 2 months of morning sickness while pregnant with DSS2 to being hungover every morning - I'm told she drinks vodka by the half pint glass.
DSS2 is nearly 6 and apart from being mad as a hatter, seems to be developing like any normal little boy (and thriving since he moved to a decent school last year as I was starting to be a little concerned, but that's another matter).
Congratulations on your good news 
, but sorry to hear how unsupportive your DH is being. I agree with chocoroo's comment on giving him a little shake and a reminder of how babies aren't just dropped down the chimney by the stork.
Thanks everyone!! I'm still feeling far from relaxed, but you're right: what's done is done, and it's best to look to the future rather than the past - and the future will be a brighter place with an extra bit of joy in the house 
And YES, my husband is, er, struggling a little with adjusting to the idea of his infertile wife suddenly expecting a baby. To put it mildly. But that's mostly because he's scared, and the alcohol thing just adds an extra level of worry for him. I think he wants reassurance that all will be well before he lets himself become emmotionally invested. Until then we're in the land of defence mechanisms. I do kinda wish I could give him a day of pregnancy hormones though... that would sort him out.
And thanks so much for your balanced responses. I came across so much doom, gloom and outright hysteria when I was trying to find information elsewhere. The rhetoric concerning smoking was mostly about encouraging and supporting mothers-to-be, whilst the alcohol pages read like a horror story. Sounds like your chapter is long overdue, ChocolateIsAFoodGroup
Good luck OP. What wonderful news for you and quite nice really to have been slightly oblivious during the fragile first trimester. Like other posters here I feel certain your baby will be absolutely fine. As will your DH - well done for having compassion for his shocked state of mind while managing your own pg hormones. You are a born parent!!! 
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