Nursery dilemma - near home or work?

[elmo1980]

I'm currently looking at nurseries for my ds when I go back to work later in the year (booo).

My office is about an hours drive from where I live but there's a good nursery about 3 doors down which I thought would be perfect as if anything goes wrong or I'm needed I just have to pop down the road.

However, I'm worried that 2 hours a day traveling for my ds 3 or 4 days a week (hours to be agreed with work) is far too much and he would be better off going to one nearer where we live and that feeds into the local primary school that he will be going to anyway in a few years.

I'm really torn but gut instinct is saying go for nearer home as if I'm ever sick he can still go to nursery.

What would you do?

[bakingcupcakes]

I chose nearer home because in an emergency the nursery is local to my parents who were willing to collect him if necessary. Also I go by train so it meant I could read my book in peace!

My fear in your position would be choosing the nursery near work and DS falling asleep in the car on the way home meaning he wasn't tired at bedtime.

[welshweasel]

Definitely near home. You really don't want to commute that far with a small child.

[letsgetcake]

I also would say home. It saved me when i was very ill and i could drag myself to dropping ds off. If id had it near work ( 1 hr away) i wouldnt have made it and would have been stuck with an 18mo whilst very ill!

[TooDamnSarky]

Home. Definitely.

[2014newme]

Near home.

[redcaryellowcar]

I'd be tempted with home, but a friend of mind has to use one nearer school as she can't drop off early enough at he one nearest home to get to work on time. Something to consider?

[alwaysthepessimist]

home.

[MadeForThis]

Home. It's a lot of travel for a little one.

If you are off sick then dc can still go to nursery. Same if you are on holiday and need a day to yourself.

[Twinkletwinklelittlestarma]

Home! Personally I couldn't imagine commuting that far with my baby/toddler...especially if they were in a tired and grumpy mood!

[splendide]

Home otherwise your DS will get an hour of sleep as you drive home then be up forever (or mine would anyway!).

[Heirhelp]

Home. The one next to work means your little one is spending two hours sitting in a car and he would be much better off playing at nursery.

[elmo1980]

Phew thanks all, home it is.

I was this close to reserving his place at the one near to work but of course it would be stupid of me to subject him to all that travel! Thanks for making me see sense!

[talkingtoclarry]

My DS is in nursery round the corner from our house. Works really well, drop him off, I get dropped off at the train station and OH drives to work. If the trains are delayed or there is a snarl up on the motorway the one can collect DS on time. Plus he can still go in on days I'm sick or on AL and need to do stuff without having a toddler causing havoc!

[Cineraria]

If you are driving, near home sounds best. Since I returned in October, DS and I commute an hour and a half each way to work/nursery as I have a nice one in my workplace but we go by train and DH travels halfway with us as part of his commute so he can have a feed and then we can have lots of fun reading, playing games (and in DS's case, flirting shamelessly with any blonde female passengers who might turn out to be Elsa from Frozen in disguise!). If we drove, I'd rather he spent the time playing actively at nursery instead of strapped in a car seat.

[SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower]

Another vote for home. Invaluable if you're off sick or on holiday and you can still take them in

[Changingagain]

I have a 40 minute commute by car. I went for work as I would have had to start later and finish earlier otherwise and I was already reducing my hours to 4 days in order to have time with DS.

He loves the journey (though we do have a rather picturesque drive) and he doesn't sleep in the car anymore. When he was younger he did but it didn't stop him sleeping at bed time.

In hindsight, nearer home would have been a lot better on days when I've been sick and DM lives near us and would have been willing to collect him when he's been sick. A further reduction in work hours wasn't viable financially for us though so we didn't really have the choice.

[EpoxyResin]

I went for near work, but like a pp I wouldn't have been able to make up my contracted hours if ds was at a nursery near home. The extra time trying to get out of the city at that later time once I'd dropped him off would have made life impossible.

But my commute's much shorter than yours; 30-45 minutes each way taking into account traffic. We enjoy the drive, I talk to him about his day (okay, so I say words I think he'll recognise based on what the nursery news letter says they've been looking at - "have you seen a SQUARE today? What about a CIRCLE?" - and he says things like "tree!" and "bus!" back to me when we drive past them; he's not even 2 though, so that's as good as it gets). Didn't have a problem with the drive when he was younger either - we have fun :)

[elmo1980]

Hmm yes it will mean a very early start for us and a long day for him in nursery as I'll be fitting 4 days into 3 and a half but, as others have said, I would rather he spend that time at nursery rather than travelling. He will only be 8 months old too so I want to make it as easy as possible on him.

[EpoxyResin]

DS was just 7 months when he started so I know what you mean about trying to make it easy for him. Another thing we found in favour of near work was it turned out he wouldn't drink any expressed milk AT ALL at nursery (and is allergic to formula), so in having him with me til the last minute and picking him up at the earliest opportunity meant I could feed him either side of his day at nursery. But that was quite a specific situation to us.

I think either way is absolutely fine and home sounds like the right decision for you.

[elmo1980]

I had lovely thoughts of us having long chats in the car together with him telling me all about his day!! I am obviously deluded with how far his speech will develop in the next 6 months!

In reality he would be fast asleep then be a little bugger to deal with when I get him home.

[Swissgemma]

We have gone for a creche near work. My monkey goes in with my husband twice a week 90 mins each way and means he is out of the house for 12 hours. this is absolutely the right thing for us. I am often over an hour away from home whereas my DH is 5 mins away in an emergency. I travel my husband doesn't so having a creche that fits in with his work really helps (a local creche wouldn't work with his working day). Monkey sleeps all the way there and back!

[Kiwi32]

Slightly different opinion to most so far but my DS started nursery next door to where I work at 8 months old. My commute is 40-50mins, 3 days a week. At 13 months he tends to nap on the way in and then I get him into PJs and BF before we drive home. He falls asleep on the way and transfers straight into cot at home. I do have the benefit of using my workplace to do the changing and feeding which I appreciate is unusual. Not sure when you'd be collecting but by the time I pick up at 5.45pm he is exhausted, even more so when he first started. If it was any later I think he'd be asleep when I picked him up. Just wanted to add another experience to the mix, hope you find what works for you

[trilbydoll]

As the mother who is regularly sprinting out of work at 12.59 for a 1pm pickup I would also say work

They get used to the travel, one of dd1's little friends has an hour commute and they used to transfer her straight to bed. Now she's bigger she never falls asleep in the car whereas dd1 still can't be driven anywhere after 4pm!

[ExcuseMeButImHavingACrisis]

I would say near home. If you needed time off to sort stuff out or home with cold, flu whatever at least you could drop your child off. Plus your child will make friends with local kids and having play dates will be easier

[BusyBee2017]

I went with closer to home because if you have a day off work then it isn't a chore to drop off to nursery and you saved fuel. Also because the nursery near my home is outstanding and has a forest school and use of a big field behind the forest school which I was not aware of