Sorry for ranty title am just so tired and stressed and beyond it at the moment so will try and order my message So it doesn't read like a mad woman's nonsensical witterings after a bottle of wine (which actually is quite an accurate description of me atm).
I have dd who is 2.3 and Ds who is 8 mos and they are both driving me to f*ing distraction at the minute! will start with Ds as this is where most of my probs/concerns are right now.
He was a perfectly happy contented baby until around a month ago when he just became a milk/food monster and hasn't stopped since. I can't lift him anymore as he has moved up to the 99th centile due to the fact that all he does is whinge and moan for food/bottle all day even after he has just finished a meal or bottle. He has been on special milk since birth due to cmpi (not sure if relevant but trying not to drip feed if you'll excuse the pun). He doesn't move at all - despite putting him on his tummy/toys out of reach etc, he seems to have no motivation. Think this is due to dd putting toys in front of him and no real need for him to move but obviously he's just getting bigger and bigger. Have no concerns over rest of his development - smiles and interacts loads, clapping etc just doesn't seem at all fussed about moving and cries/fusses to be picked up after 5 mins on the floor. As a result he is bored much of the day and not using any energy so still feeding two or three times a night which is just wearing me out on top of his daytime needs. Am taking him bk to HV on thurs to be weighed again as they seemed concerned last time about his weight and non moving, and tbh I'm finding their concern really stressful right now and seems to have ramped up my own worrying about the fact that I am turning poor Ds in to an obese, floor-bound chunk who can't move himself.
Add to this his whirlwind two year old sis (nursery two days per wk praise the Lord) who has taken to being extra clingy, crying over absolutely nothing and waking in the night two or three times refusing to go bk to sleep unless myself or dp lie in her room with her until she falls asleep. Been a bit ill lately so this may be why but it has continued and it is relentless as even familiar friends and family can't help out as she goes crazy unless she is with myself or Dp. Still happy for us to leave her at nursery though for some reason.
Dp is really helpful but we are at the back breaking end of our tethers. The demands all through the day without a break added to no sleep is just wearing me down and I'm starting to feel depressed and like I just want to go bk to work and leave all this behind (would need to find a job first though as was just qualifying in my field when I had Ds).
I just feel like I have no control over anything with them - no routine for Ds as it seems impossible to do unless we just stay in which makes me feel even lower and which dd doesn't like as she wants to go to soft play etc. His naps are so hit and miss which may be contributing to night time, having said this he usually gets a good couple of hours in the daytime despite being lugged around to groups etc.
This is long I realise and I really appreciate if anyone has stayed the distance and read this, I feel a bit better already just writing it all down. If anyone has any experience, words or encouragement or anything else I would love to hear from you. I promise I am not this maudlin usually, just want a bit of myself back and to feel like I'm doing an ok job. Thought it would be easier second time round but oh god it's soooo much harder 😩😩😩
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Please help am losing the will to live!! (bit long)
34 replies
c737 · 23/05/2016 12:48
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