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Furious!

(33 Posts)
mixedraceparents Wed 24-Feb-10 17:24:20

Help!

I think I have mentiond before my (mixed race) son is at a school that is 95% bangladeshi. There are no white/african or mixed race people in his class. He has been called nig head as a result of which I had to relax his hair. He gets attacked alot, apparently the year 3 boys like proving they are hard by picking on him. No he's not perfect but he is highly intelligent and better hes a fabulous son who helps me with the little ones and is funny and kind. I am really angry that AS USUAL I tried to call his teacher this afternoon only to find her too busy to call me. This has happened lots of times. He hates his school, from being a year or more ahead at the end of the first year now he shows no interest in learning. I want him moved but the local schools are oversubscribed. When I called admissions to complain they all they could do was get social workers to investigate. I made a complaint before on another matter and after a month of intimidation decided to drop it, after which the intimidation magically disappeared. hmm The only option I have is to move and I think it's really DISGUSTING that a school can ignore the needs of their pupils in such a manner.

They did do a lesson on Africa from which my son gleaned that Africans live in huts and don't have phones, which his furious father set him straight on.

Any suggestions on which way forward? I am getting no help at all here from the people who are paid to help. He's been on waiting lists for the local schools for a couple of years but they are all full or so they say.

I am getting really upset now.

tiggergirl Wed 24-Feb-10 18:41:33

you should make a formal complain to the head of school and demand to be seen you can also complain to the borough of education i was bullied and knocked out because i was the only white family in the school across road from where we lived and a friend who lives in a posh white area has 2 mixed race children and they too are being taught the wrong things about their heirtage and bullied and hurt.she got ofsted involved and borough of school as it not right all children are the same and not fair your son is singled out you live in the community so your intitalled to go to that school they need to pull their finger out because if it was one of them being singled out in a white school they soon have something to say. think they would take it to tribual as it disusting the way teacher is being they should be promoting equal opportunities in their teaching which means they are breaking their contact in schools .
i wish you all the luck in world. my mum ended up sueing as i lost memory and school denied their was a problem but they soon learn when staff was changed and we had to have a pay out.

giveitago Wed 24-Feb-10 19:20:51

Oh gosh - sorry don't know whatyou are going through but it sounds absolutely impossible for your son.

What was the inimidation actually?

So he's being racially bullied and marginalised - that is against all regulations and can you get your local MP on the case?????

giveitago Wed 24-Feb-10 19:24:13

It reminds me of an old friend of mine who had to give up 6th form and hence alevels as he was being bullied over his origin - nothing to do with anything in the UK and he was basically told by the head that the head could do nothing as the parents of the bullies had far more clout. He left - he never finished his education.

fight, fight fight - are you seriously telling me your ds was taught in class that africans live in huts????

OMG. Is this what my child will be taught when he goes to school - I very much hope not.

harimosmummy Wed 24-Feb-10 19:28:04

I hope that you don't take this as too simplistic an approach, but I would take him out and home school him.

I am training as a teacher and have spent time in a few schools I'm sad to say I simply WOULD NEVER ALLOW my child to go to.

A formal complaint is required for no other reason that they are telling people that people in Africa live in huts and don't have phones. FFS! What's that all about?

sarah293 Wed 24-Feb-10 19:29:57

Message withdrawn

Starbear Wed 24-Feb-10 19:49:14

How old is your son? I would report this to the police. If the culprits are under 10 years it would not be a criminal matter but police will get involved under 'Every Child Matters' Have to put mine to bed now but I'll get you a link later. No one in 21st century in the UK should put up with bullying no matter who it comes from.

Starbear Wed 24-Feb-10 19:51:32

Every Child Matters I'll find more later

Starbear Wed 24-Feb-10 19:58:35

Phone your local Borough Police HQ and ask if they have a Safer Schools officer for your son's school.
page 20

saggarmakersbottomknocker Wed 24-Feb-10 20:03:27

As you aren't getting any joy by phone I would put your complaint in writing to the head and ask for a meeting. In the meantime call the school office and request a copy of the bullying policy. They should have one.

If the bullying continues you may have grounds to appeal for a place at one of the other schools.

shockers Wed 24-Feb-10 20:04:57

I would ask for your son to be moved on the grounds that he is being discriminated against. I would also get in touch with your MP.
On the subject of Africans and huts. A young man who had been working in Nigeria building a school, came in to our class to give a talk and slide show. The people in the village where he had stayed did live in huts made of mud and didn't have phones or electricity/ running water. When the children went home, they may have discussed this in similar terms with their parents.

shallishanti Wed 24-Feb-10 20:13:42

Your school has to have a race equality policy, and has to record racist incidents, that is the law. Your LEA should have an officer or team responsible for race equality, it's their job to make sure school complies with this.
(it's a racist incident if any of the participants or onlookers consider it a racist incident)
re the mud huts, I have to go now but if I have time later can post useful links.
hth

frogetyfrog Wed 24-Feb-10 20:19:56

This is so unacceptable that you really do need to kick up a fuss in a big way. I second (or third) the MP business, also your local county council who are responsible for the schools. I would put a summary of the situation in writing and send to them all, including ofsted. Even if you do feel the need to move, there may be other children who come along in the future who suffer as your dc have. Not good enough and needs to be sorted. In our Local Education Authority (and maybe all) all schools have to summarise racial related incidents in a yearly report and these then get investigated and looked at. Make sure your school is accurately reporting yours and not sweeping them under the carpet.

frogetyfrog Wed 24-Feb-10 20:21:39

Oops, cross posted with Shallishanti who put it better!

mixedraceparents Wed 24-Feb-10 20:28:16

Thank for all the advice it's really helped. I'm going to ask him to write down everything that happens and I have already emailed the head.

Hopefully presenting alot of evidence will help us.

From what my son says he was shown pictures of a village and huts and from that got the idea that all africans live in huts. I wish they would show big cities as well, for obvious reasons.

Starbear Thu 25-Feb-10 10:19:49

mixedraceparents Would it be to rude to ask you to keep us updated. I would like to know if my advice is correct. if it's not then I would like to know so I don't pass it on again.

mixedraceparents Thu 25-Feb-10 12:38:04

Hi star yes just waiting to hear from a school about 5 mins from us hopefully we can get him in asap. On the website one of their beliefs is racial equality so its sounding good.

I called this morning to see if his teacher was available and of course she wasn't. So I sympathised that we had of course had one telephone conversation in the last six months and didn't want to overwork her, to which they said "ok then" hmm

Sarcasm obviously not their strong point lol. I should say we live miles away and he goes by bus so we never see the teachers and can't just march in whenevre we feel like it.

harimosmummy Thu 25-Feb-10 13:05:29

Good luck, Mixedracedparents

shallishanti Thu 25-Feb-10 21:46:32

http://www.dea.org.uk/members/decs.asp

re the mud huts
I feel your pain!

this organisation 'promoting education for a just and sustainable world' has a network of centres who work with schools and colleges to help them move beyond the mud huts thing. If you click on your region on the map you should find your nearest centre, they should be able to give your school a kick up the backside...er I mean constructive criticism and support.

mixedraceparents Fri 26-Feb-10 07:10:07

lol and thanks shalli - I'll definitely have a look and let them know. My son is now leaving that school, and the teacher STILL hasn't called which pretty much says it all! Similarly no answer to my email to the head. *sighs

I will be sending another wink

To be fair to the school I'm not sure what was in the lesson, that was just the picture my son had come away with although he should know better - his dad is on the phone to africa day and night grin

mixedraceparents Fri 26-Feb-10 13:25:51

uh oh I've killed the thread again *hides

MammaGi Tue 11-May-10 22:03:43

Aaaagghh!!!! Mud huts and no phones?? Who are these teachers that are teaching this load of bs to kids in schools?? Our education system is pathetic in parts. So what else are these teachers teaching, that Irish people are small, wear green hats and tunics and grant wishes??!! Get a grip, schools of Britain!!

MammaGi Tue 11-May-10 22:16:27

And in answer to shockers' illogical post, think about what you're saying! the young man who came into your class to talk about nigeria is one man talking about one area in one country in the massive continent that is africa. you are aware that africa is a continent, made up of many countries - not a country itself?? How can you judge one area and say the whole of africa is the same way?? my husband is from neighbouring Cameroon, and he tells me that each area of Cameroon is different, in terms of modernisation, architecture etc. for instance, Buea, a major city, is westernised, and not so different to Britain, but the more isolated areas, like the villages, are more traditional in their ways (and why shouldn't they be, by the way, we're so high and mighty!) and yes, in SOME parts of cameroon, people use mud to build their homes etc, but in other parts of cameroon, they use cement, stone, concrete etc - it all depends what material is local.

Aminata100 Mon 27-Sep-10 16:13:35

My ex lives in Africa (not in a city!) and we are in touch by mobile phone and (work)email!!

It's unbelievable that schools are still churning out such 50s-era rubbish!!

I hope your son is happy in school now, mixedraceparents!

giveitago Fri 01-Oct-10 19:27:10

I've been to 4 african countries in my life - the last time I went my ds was conceived so I'm a massive fan (as you can imagine).

All countries have their rich and poor, education and non education, nice and horrible, etc.

I don't think shocker wrote an 'illogical' post. Shocker was just saying her kid's school had a particular talk based on one particular person's experience. Blame the school not shocker. Ddon't see where shocker implied that Nigeria was representative of an entire continent.

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