Crap presents that ex has sent to DD - feel free to point, laugh, and add your own...

[AnarchyAunt]

So today, exPIL came for the quarterly visit to DD. Ex didn't come, he never does.

He did however send her a Kinder egg, and a black fake leather pillow with 'wild thing' stitched on it in sequins that plays Wild Thing when you squeeze it

I think this beats than the box of Quality Street he sent her for the Christmas before last.

[fruitshootsandheaves]

[Twims]

How old is DD

[duchesse]

My sister's ex got their 3 yr old son a boxed set of Jurassic Park films for his b/day (went on Ebay). More recently, he gave his by then 6 yr old son a mobile phone (now inexplicably always out of power).

[AnarchyAunt]

DD is 5.11!

I should just be glad he hasn't repeated the time he gave her a 'book'.

It was the bloody Argos catalogue

Cue three weeks of DD wanting everything before it mysteriously disappeared one night.

[atowncalledalice]

That pillow is from The Works! It is truly hideous, your poor DD

[AnarchyAunt]

I think I will let her choose an alternative pillow when we are out shopping tomorrow.

Its just so hard because he gives her so little (emotionally as well as in terms of gifts - he doesn't see her anymore, or phone/write to her) that DD really clings to the things he does give.

[bronze]

Ho about buying a new cover for it so you can protect it as its special

[mrsmortenharket]

((((((((((((aa's dd))))))))))))))
that pillow is hideous for anyone let alon your dd poor lass.

[AnarchyAunt]

It will still sing though. Or maybe it could accidentally go in the wash?

[duchesse]

Accidental boil wash?

[Podrick]

What an idiot

Let her keep the pillow though

[glitterfairy]

LOL My x veers between outrageously expensive stuff they dont need and nothing at all. Famine or feast and the feast doesnt feed them.

[mankymummy]

some outrageously expensive real walkie talkies.

cannot afford maintenance but quite happy to send him home with these two bloody things that emit very very loud static.

Interspersed with DS shouting "roger, roger, over and out" its enough to send me bonkers !

[AnarchyAunt]

Can the batteries just run out and never get replaced? Though I suppose that doesn't stop the shouting.

[glitterfairy]

manky mine didnt give child maintenance but did send a Rolly thingy which we sent back as the kids have ipods. Turned out we found it was worth £300! [hmm}

[AnarchyAunt]

Oooh if only you'd known

Mind you if ex sent DD anything worth £300 I'd know that either his mother had bought it and passed it off as being from him, or that he'd nicked it.

[MarkStretch]

When my dd unwrapped a present from my ex this Christmas, he had accidentally wrapped one of his mother's slipper socks in with it.

It was filthy.

[AnarchyAunt]

[shudder]

[QueenOfFrighteningEveryone]

I have just been reminded of this thread by the one about presents you'd like to send to the ex (I am OP btw under a new name)

DD's dad has carried on with this fine tradition recently, sending her (via a mutual friend who was coming to see us) a 'sword' he had made from blue foam and gaffa tape. At least we think it is a sword - its a bit floppy but sword-ish in shape.

[aseriouslyblondemoment]

omfg..
words fail me..but hey ladies add your ideas to my horrible exh/p thread it's sooo therapeutic and it's amazing what springs to mind
lets give these bastards men what they deserve

but it's helpful to let it out..and if anything gives us all a giggle
ohh and before i forget am glad that ex mil no longer gets her knitting needles out as even noel edmonds wouldn't wear them

[brightwell]

For dd's 11th bday ex gave her a t-shirt with the slogan "I'm a natural blonde, speak slowly to me" Nice!

[aseriouslyblondemoment]

hmm so awful you wouldn't even let your dog deliver pups on it
brightwell what did you say?!

[mmrred]

My absolute favourite in this very specific category - a wicker cat basket with an incredibly realistic fluffy kitten curled up in it.

Realistic because it was an actual dead, stuffed kitten.

[brightwell]

During an argument I did ask why he thought a t-shirt with "that" slogan was appropriate for an 11 year old blonde girl who is dyslexic. I refused to let her wear it and it got "lost" somehow.

Yuck at the dead kitten!