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News

joining tharmed forces..can't believe how harsh some views are when families say how anxious they are

55 replies

zippitippitoes · 12/10/2006 09:35

..just listening on the radio to family of armed services personnel serving in eg Iraq and people saying well hard luck they knew what it was like when they mariied a soldier, let their son join up etc and it's not as bad as the ww1 and ww2.

I was shocked at how low the pay is for an ordinary soldier and still feel for the youngsters thrown into it at 18

I can't believe that people have this serves them right for being mugs and joining up attitude

OP posts:

Report

Cappuccino · 12/10/2006 09:37

did anyone say 'they should bring back national service?'

zippitippitoes · 12/10/2006 09:39

lol

it's victoria derbyshire by the way on five live

OP posts:

bundle · 12/10/2006 09:41

I'm amazed that anyone signs up (even if they were paid double). but then again, i am a pacifist

SoupDragon · 12/10/2006 09:44

Knowing that they are a soldier and what that entails does not stop you worrying about them!

expatinscotland · 12/10/2006 09:45

two of my closest - female - friends were in the US Navy.

why?

they grew up impoverished in very small towns.

in the case of my friend Suzi, her mother was a junkie, so she was sent to live w/her dad and stepmother.

her dad was a drunk and her stepmum physically abused her horribly.

she had no prospects - couldn't afford higher education, employment very limited in her area.

so she signed up as soon as, b/c she saw it as a ticket out of there.

saltire · 12/10/2006 09:45

Don't you think though that so many people in this country are anti-war that it has developed into anti-armed forces as well?

saltire · 12/10/2006 09:47

and soupy's right, just because they are in the armed forces, and knowing what that entails doesn't stop their spouses/parents from worrying about them

jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 12/10/2006 09:54

My DH is Army. He chose the route for himself at 21. He will be the first to admit, it was his "ticket" out of the smallest town with the most over-powering parents and a chance to see the world and stand on his own 2 feet.

When I married him, of course I knew what life could entail, BUT, it doesnt mean that everytime he goes away I dont sit and panic and worry for every moment he is gone.

DH is due out the Army any time now and to be honest, after nearly 7 years service, he is ready. The way our soliders are treated, both at home and away is a disgrace, and not acceptable in this day and age.

Dont you all sleep well at night knowing that ANYONE can get on to an Army camp... every night this week I have managed to access the camp with no ID and no car pass to pick DH up, and not been questioned. Who's to say I dont have a bomb in the boot of my car?!

khakiqueen · 12/10/2006 09:54

I,m in the Army and have a dd of 2, my DP is in the Army as well - we are getting married in Feb and then he is off to Afghan for six months - why do we put ourselves through this - I dont know it just sort of happened! I will worry everyday for the six months he is a way, and you dont get used to it you just accept it and spend alot of time chatting to friends! And as for anyone who says -its their choice etc etc - where is their compassion for humans, and dont forget your history!

khakiqueen · 12/10/2006 09:58

P.S hI jessicaandrebeccasmummy, I am really getting into mn - I think it will really help when DH is away, just hearing from you yesterday helped - although I am worrying that i will now spend all my time on MN and not on my studies!

saltire · 12/10/2006 10:00

JARM, all our armed forces are treated badly, not just the soldiers. You are right about the security, i am married to someone in the RAF, and security on our station is laughable. Children under 16 aren't supposed to get on unaccompanied but they do, even children from the village who have no right to be there. the high fence doesn't go all the way round!!!

jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 12/10/2006 10:03

Madness huh.

My brother works for a shipping company in Felixstowe and ANYONE can get into the Port without being checked, they only get checked on the way out - so not being funny, how easy would it be to go and plant a bomb and leave easily?! And we wonder why there are openings for terrorist attacks.

fairyjay · 12/10/2006 10:08

My dh was in the Navy for a number of years, but all those years ago (!) people joined up not really expecting a war. Then the Falklands came along - which can in no way be compared to what the forces are struggling thru' now, but was still a wake up call at the time.

That's why I think the forces deserve more money, because no longer is it all just practise, it's now the real thing.

And I'm full of admiration for those of you who have dps/dhs in the Forces at the moment, it must be a really difficult time.

jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 12/10/2006 10:11

The wages are laughable too.... for what they do and what their job entails.

DH currently earns a take home pay of £1100 a month, admittedly the rent for our home is taken off prior to that but when we pay £6 a day for our house, it isnt overly much more!

southeastastralplain · 12/10/2006 10:13

who has the attitude, the callers?

how bizarre, it's probably the same people that were behind our soldiers during the falklands.

khakiqueen · 12/10/2006 10:13

And I bet your house is not brilliant either, and you cant get anythong repaired! I wonder if they think that a lump sum of £2000 whatever it is after 6 months away is going to stop the amount of soldiers leaving!

tissy · 12/10/2006 10:16

I don't think anyone is "thrown into it" though- it may be a route out of a worse situation for some young people, but they always have a choice.

Sure I feel sorry for the families of servicemen and women who are sent to a war zone, it must be unimaginably hard, but no-one can say they didn't expect it!

jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 12/10/2006 10:17

Our house consists of a lounge, a tiny kitchen that must be 60 years old, 3 bedrooms and a seperate bathroom and toilet.

It is absolutely disgusting, yet no matter what we do to make it better - it still looks a state.

Its all fine and well saying we get cheap housing - yeah great, but it doesnt help that when we get out, there is no housing available to us via council or housing associations and we cant afford the private rent route because we dont have savings or an income! Mental!

saggarmakersbottomknocker · 12/10/2006 10:19

It's truly scary how young the soldiers are in Iraq and Afghanistan. My ds1 (18) has two friends in Iraq at the moment. I can't imagine how their parents must feel, I'd be afraid to turn on the TV.

zippitippitoes · 12/10/2006 10:21

I meant the youngsters thrown into a war situation at 18, in fact not even something as controlled as a war.."war" implies strategy and rules which in places like Iraq is not the case

OP posts:

jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 12/10/2006 10:21

Iraq, I think many feel it is an un-justified war, one that we shouldnt be fighting and one that has lost too many of our own people (service and civilian)

There wasnt a week gone by when based in Wiltshire that a member of our regiment had been injured or killed. Really hits home when you are living in the same road/estate as families who have just lost someone.

Roll on DH's discharge date - this will be a tough time for us, but it will be so good having DH home and not answerable to anyone but me!!! LOL

khakiqueen · 12/10/2006 10:23

Where is it? mt last house was in NI and it had damp and they wont replace the broken shower - I am in scotland and sctually its not bad, no damp or grim but the housing repair contracts have been privatised so their are not interested if you want anything fixed.

jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 12/10/2006 10:25

We are in Colchester now. They are spending millions and millions of pounds on the new Garrison - well posh it is too, yet we are in scummy houses.

We cant use our 3rd bedroom because the window doesnt shut properly and it is too cold for a baby to sleep in there

We have NO heating because the boiler was condemned and we are using the immersion for hot water - and have been for 3 months now.

The sooner we are out the better.

megandsoph · 12/10/2006 10:26

Re the wages. When I joined up in "97" They were so much worse than they are now. After training my wage was varied every month from £490 to £550PM Since it's gone right up still shite but so much better.

I was brought up also with my dad in the army from birth till I joined up myself and the security thing has always been the same, there was only one camp we lived in that wouldn't allow you to leave or get in without signing in or out and that was at Weeton bks. Everywhere else we were always free to come and go as were everyone else.

I personally loved being in the army as a singley but it changed when I got married and lived as a pads wife, the army don't like families IMO

khakiqueen · 12/10/2006 10:30

Hey tissy, you are being quite controversial! I was in Iraq in 2003 and even though we had training, I didnt expect the enormous fear when you are being mortared! You can never be trained for that - and now in Afghan where they are having man on man gun fights - with live rounds - even alot of soldiers in there 30s have not experienced that! Let alone 18yrs olds. Expectation and realisation are two different things.

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