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Would you be upset if it happened to you?

93 replies

Earlybird · 17/02/2006 09:43

Read in the paper today that Robin Cook left an estate worth approx £565,000. His second wife Gaynor is to receive over £500,000 and his two sons (by first wife) are to receive £20,000 each. Both sons are in their early 30's.

Does that seem fair? How would you feel if you were one of his sons?

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ssd · 17/02/2006 09:44

upset and pissed off.

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blueteddy · 17/02/2006 09:45

Message withdrawn

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zippitippitoes · 17/02/2006 09:46

I don't think it is particularly reasonable..it couldn't happen in France

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fruitful · 17/02/2006 09:47

Depends whether you view the money as belonging solely to the husband, or whether you think it belonged to the couple (regardless of legal ownership). If dh died and left the majority of our property to anyone other than me (including to grown-up kids) I'd be pissed off! As far as I'm concerned, when you get married, you share all your stuff - joint ownership from then on, even if you don't sort it out legally.

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Avalon · 17/02/2006 09:47

Not happy - but he could have given them some money already?

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Earlybird · 17/02/2006 09:48

zippi - what would happen in France?

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zippitippitoes · 17/02/2006 09:49

in France you can't disinherit your children

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serenity · 17/02/2006 09:49

It depends I suppose, it could be that the will was written with RC assuming he would be older. The large sum to Gaynor would be so she doesn't end up selling the house/having financial problems due to the sudden disapperance of RC's salary. At 30+ I would assume his sons weren't dependant anymore so the £20k is a 'gift' rather than a financial necessity.

Money isn't an indicator of love.

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kittyfish · 17/02/2006 09:51

Typical bloke behaviour IMO - led by the dick as usual.

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Marina · 17/02/2006 09:51

I'd feel very upset about it, but do we know if that is how they feel themselves? (Not seen the press coverage).
For example:

  • Might be so angry with their father over how he treated their mother they didn't want his money

  • Might be financially OK themselves

  • Might like their stepmother enough not to seethe with resentment...I seem to recall them sitting with her at the funeral and looking pretty amicable, or am I imagining that? It is was his first wife who was banished to the middle of the church , not his sons

    It was his money in the end. But I would never do such a thing to my own children and it does seem very unfair.
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Earlybird · 17/02/2006 09:51

Well presumably, as his wife, Gaynor already stands to receive his pension - and is it correct that that would not be counted in his estate as it's an ongoing payment?

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Marina · 17/02/2006 09:56

Yes, it wouldn't be calculated as part of the estate. And we all know how generous MPs' own pensions provision are...

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tigermoth · 17/02/2006 09:57

It would depend what happense once his wife dies. I suppose his estate includes his home? If so, the will might specify that when Gaynor dies, the home is sold and the sons inherit the proceeds.

Mind you, I know someone whose father did this - married for the second time, thinking he had lots of years left, wrote a will leaving his estate to his new wife, suddently died six months after. His son got nothing - it deeply messed him up.

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madmarchhare · 17/02/2006 10:01

Yes it would piss me off. I have a good idea that my Dads estate will go to his adopted son and not me. I dont care per se, but something doesnt seem quite right about it.

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Earlybird · 17/02/2006 10:01

Marina - are the pensions generous, or are you being sarcastic?

Would life assurance policies also be outside the estate?

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foxinsocks · 17/02/2006 10:02

he may well have given the sons a lot of financial help when he was alive

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Blandmum · 17/02/2006 10:03

My dhs father just died, left a million. Left nothing to his sons or granf children at all. Not even a keepsake. And we ended up paying for the wake, his 2nd wife told us what we 'owed' her
He always was a total tosser

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pesme · 17/02/2006 10:10

his money. he was entitled to do as he d*m well pleased. 20,000 is still alot off money.

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Bink · 17/02/2006 10:11

Wills can be challenged here too - on basis of whether disinherited/unfairly treated heir could have fairly expected things to be shared out differently.

But to answer question - if it were me, I would hope I would just move on. I feel the real terrible thing is not what wills end up saying but how some prospective bequeathers dangle Expectations while they're still alive - and so I've always been keen never to get pulled into that horrible game. Luckily my family just don't do Expectations at all but I have seen the harm it does elsewhere.

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Hulababy · 17/02/2006 10:11

Think it is difficult to comment as we have no idea what other provisions are in the will, and whether the house or other assets have gone directly to the second wife, or if she just has a lifetime interest in them, etc. The sons may also have had other financial support prior to his death.

Without the full picture who knows what really has happened.

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Earlybird · 17/02/2006 10:13

It's true we don't know what he did for his sons prior to his death - and he may have done alot.

There are also people who consider that financial obligations to their children are finished once their education is complete/paid for because presumably at that point the children are capable of supporting themselves.

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macwoozy · 17/02/2006 10:18

Same kind of thing happened to me. 8 years ago my dad died, leaving a pub, a guest house, and a house to his 2nd wife[step mum] with the understanding that when she died, it would all go to myself and brother[that was stated in her will]. Since then she's remarried, sold all the properties, and we lost contact. To think that eventually all my dad's estate might go to her new husband and his children if she dies makes me so

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ladymuck · 17/02/2006 10:22

My parents are in their late 50s, and I'm practically certain that their wills are still written that if anything happens to either one of them then the other inherits practically everything with minor gifts going to myself and my sibling. I would hate to see the survivor living in poverty in old age becuase the deceased had decided to gift the money to me. So I'm not particularly surprised. I don't think that the fact that Gaynor was his scond wife should have that much to do with it, as presumably his first wife got a settlement out of the divorce (which may include entitlement to part of his pension).

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iota · 17/02/2006 10:24

Earlybird - I think you'll find that MP's pensions are in fact VERY generous:

Members? pensions Current scheme Members of Parliament belong to the parliamentary pension scheme. This is a final salary scheme with a current accrual rate of 1/40 th. It is a contributory pension with the contribution rate now set at 10% of salary.

you can find details here

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lilibet · 17/02/2006 10:24

there are significant tax advantages to what he has done, bequests to spouses are wholly exempt from Inheritance tax

Therefore to me, him being an intelligent man, there is probably some agreement in place for her to give them more without incurring a charge to IHT

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