ds to be circumcised

[HappyMumof2]

Don't want to start an argument about circumcision here.

Just got back from hospital with ds and he is to be circumcised in July (medical reasons.....)

Can anyone please reassure me that he won't hate me forever and grow up emotionally and physically damaged??? Please don't post if you are going to tell me anything real awful.....

Have been told by consultant there is no choice. It needs doing, and soon.

Also have added worry that he has sickle cell trait (issue with anaesthetic) so not feeling too good about the whole thing

How will he be afterwards? I am so squeamish........

HELP!!

[Twiglett]

he won't hate you forever .. he'll be fine .. he won't grow up emotionally and physically damaged .. its just a circumcision

don' worry

how old is he?

[Twiglett]

my DS is circumcised btw

[Twiglett]

as are 95% of Americans, all Jews, Muslims etc etc etc

[HappyMumof2]

Yeah, I know

maybe I'm over reacting a bit!

He's had problems since he'd just turned 3 and I've been putting it off for ages, hoping it would sort itself out. He's now nearly 7.

Wish he'd had it done ages ago now.........

[Socci]

My dad was apparently circumcised and he has never found it a problem afaik.

[Twiglett]

I think he might be uncomfortable for a couple of days and his first urination will probably hurt ... just talk it through with him .. don't let it be a surprise

. but honestly he'll be fine .. friend's DS had his done at 6 and he was fine too

[VeniVidiVickiQV]

Hope it goes well, my DS has just been referred to a urologist with possibly the same outcome.

I know all my brothers had it done for the same reason and they have no issues with it.

[HappyMumof2]

Thanks Twiglett I think atm he is quite looking forward to it as the dr said he has to have the week off school! He has been getting a lot of pain with weeing anyway so he should cope with that. I'm just worried about what it will look like and that it's going to upset him (and me!)

QV, that's interesting. The dr said there could be a family link as ds's dad has problems too. He has actually said to me he wishes he'd be 'done'
Good Luck to your ds too

[HappyMumof2]

been 'done'

[MamaMaiasaura]

HMo" - can i ask why he having it done. THing is my ds has problems down there too and needed anti biotic cream or something. He isnt able to retract it back fully and i dont even know if he should be able to now (he is 6). When he was 2-3 the dr said he needed to be practising in the bath.

I dont really undersatnd all about it, i should really make an appt but worried may need op too. Also i went out with a guy for sometime in my late teens early 20's and he was circumsized when we were together - his foreskin was too tight and caused him lots of pain (inlc tearing) so wouldnt want ds as an adult to exp that. Not meaning to hijack btw just releived in a way to find someone in similar prediciment. x

[HappyMumof2]

his foreskin doesn't retract. He was referred at 3 as he had balantis and was given a steroid cream which we used for ages. That helped a lot and it did start to retract quite a bit. The dr was quite happy with it and felt it may or may not need doing in the future.

He has been fine for about a year but since Febuary has had a urine infection and constant mild balantis and his urine samples keep coming back as 'mixed growth' so something not right but not a urine infection.

The consultant today said to me that if it's going to retract it will normally be doing so fully by this age. I asked about other treatments (eg, stretching) and he said they cause more problems later on and boys who have had it often come back unhappy wanting circumcision because it can lead to scarring etc.

I would take your ds back. Does it 'balloon' when he wees?

[PrettyCandles]

Give him lots of cranberry juice to drink in the week leading up to the op, and in the week or so afterwards while he is recovering. Apparently it makes the pee less 'stingy'.

Hope it goes well. I have an adult friend who was 'done' at about 8, and remembers the relief more than the op itself. His father had also had to be circumcised as a child, and so my friend had his ds done as a baby.

[Bumblelion]

My son also had recurring balanatis and was circumcised in June last year. He was 8 at the time. He was a little bit sore for a while and also bled a bit afterwards after just coming round from the anaesthetic (which was quite distressing for me and him, but apparently quite normal) but the hospital did not discharge him until we were all happy.

He came home in pyjamas and no pants and as soon as we got in, he took his pants off. It took about 1 week for the stitches to dissolve and now he is fine. No infections and it looks very neat.

My ex-h was also circumcised at age 9 for the same reason and he did not grow up feeling anything less than a man.

I actually prefer it but I did not have my son circumcised because of this - it was a medical necessity.

[MamaMaiasaura]

Yes it does balloon -i feel bad now as have put it off. Yes is was a steriod cream he was given too. I have tried to get him to keep practicing, i feel like a failed iykwim

[HappyMumof2]

Thanks for the cranberry juice tip PC

it does seem to run in families, doesn't it?

Bumblelion, I am concerned about the bleeding too. Apparently with sickle cell trait there is increased chance of excess bleeding........

I'm so glad your ds is okay. Does he seem 'happy' with how it looks now? It must be a relief to be over the balantis. I think ds is just sick of it all now

[HappyMumof2]

Awen, don't feel bad. You have given it a chance to correct itself, that's all. No harm done.

I thought ds was managing to retract his a bit in the bath but the dr did it today and it so painful for him so we obviously weren't doing it anywhere near enough.

Btw, consultant also said it's usual for it to go back to how it was after you've stopped using the steroid cream. I think the theory is, that if it's going to be 'freed' then the steroid cream should do it and if it's not then it will go back to how it was.

Is he getting balantis or urine infections atm?

[MamaMaiasaura]

Thanks for starting this thread tho - i have called dr and made appt for wednesday next week. Feel for ds tho as he will get embarrassed

[MamaMaiasaura]

no he seems ok tbh. He still cant retract it right back as it hurts him tho. I had better go get him from school now.. swimming lessons tonight

[HappyMumof2]

Good Luck for next week

[Bumblelion]

My son is "happy" with how it looks. It helps that one of his friends in school has also been circumcised and his best friend's younger brother.

When I first took my DS to the doctor, they thought it was a fungal infection and gave us some cream. The infection did not clear up, the doctor then decided it was a bacterial infection and gave us some different cream. By this time, he had formed scar tissue and that was the end reason for the circumcision.

When I first took my DS to the doctor, he was fairly embarrassed but I said to my son that the doctor sees hundreds of people every day - he sees their fingers, thumbs, knees, feet, backs, tummies, willies, etc. He has seen so many of everything that the doctor would not find it "strange" to be examining a willy and my son should not feel "strange" having his willy examined.

I remember my son saying that the doctor must have seen willies in all shapes and sizes - big ones, little ones, fat ones, thin ones - that did make me smile at the time.

[kid]

HMo2 - I wondered how it went today.
My nephew was 'done' when he was 8. He coped ok with it but he had to be a bit careful at school afterwards with football (incase he got hit with the ball or kicked)
It did sting when he went to the loo so he used to go in the bath or into some water, I think thats what he did anyway! He had to have cream applied to it several times a day after the op, not the best thing if you are squemish. Maybe he can learn quickly to apply it himself?

[intergalacticwalrus]

HappyMum, DP was circumcised at the age of 27. He said that was a nightmare, due to the whole, ahem, erection issue. That, obv wont be an issue here. DP said it was fine. It hurt a bit, but that's to be expected, but he's had no probs since.

[Sari]

Awen, really don't feel bad. Ds1 is 6 next month and his foreskin doesn't retract. We were referred to a consultant and he said it was very normal (can't remember the figures he gave but it was something like 75% of six year olds have foreskins that don't). He said to encourage him to pull it back but not to panic and to give it a few more years before thinking about circumcision unless he has recurrent infections. But to be honest I'm not very optimistic that anything is going to change so we'll probably be looking at circumcision too in a few years.

[HappyMumof2]

Thanks

I know deep down it's the right thing to do. Just feel horrible about it.

I'm actually much more worried about the sickle cell issue than I am about the circumcision itself, especially as a lot of doctors appear to not know very much about it at all.

It would be bad enough him having to have general anaesthetic without this hanging over us aswell.

I wish it could be done under a local!! Probably not very fair on ds though........

[Sari]

Sorry, HappyMum, I meant to say not to worry to you as well. I'm sure it will be absolutely fine, and I'm practically certain my ds will be going through the same as yours a few years from now.