? postnatal depression or life

[magnummum]

Was a bit startled at my twins 8 month check last week to come up borderline on PND check (HV very nice and coming back in a month to redo it). However, I knowingly scored myself lower than what I was truly feeling as I'd had a particularly difficult week with my alcoholic mum, which I explained to her.

Background is that I have a 3.5 year old and the twins who are 10 months old. DH is great but works away alot and we're just relocated to be a bit closer to family. I have just put all the feelings I've had over the past few months down to all of the above and exhaustion, being really tired and just trying to come to terms with running a home and organising a family of 5.

Just wondering how when everyday stress turns into PND really as currently feeling like a fraud that there might be the slightest possibility it's PND.

[BeckyBendyLegs]

PND is a label that covers a broad range of symptoms and states of mind. I was diagnosed with 'mild' PND with my DS3 but haven't taken anything for it or really done much except talk, talk and talk more. Looking back I realised I had mild PND symptoms with DS1 and to a lesser degree DS2 but not as bad as DS3. That test is too basic too I think to judge on as you say there are weeks when you feel worse than others. No wonder you are feeling low esp with other things to cope with.

[MathsMadMummy]

TBH, I wouldn't worry about if it's officially PND or not, what matters is that if you feel you need some help, you get it!

[fufflebum]

AS previous poster said does it matter whether it is PND or not. It is how you are feeling that counts. Whether you want it to be called PND or not. As with anything to do with our mental health there is a social stigma to saying you have 'depression' or 'anxiety' or 'PND'. It is a label as I say how you feel is more important.

You are having to manage three young children and all that brings with it. Plus although the hormone changes that come with pregnancies and birth as well as the sleep deprivation and so forth that comes with little children.

I remember completing these checks after both my children were born and underestimated each time how I felt. TBH it does fluctuate day to day according to how the kids are, what other stuff is going on in your life.

If you feel you are needing more help, in whatever form that takes ask for it. Sometimes just admitting how you are feeling is a therapy in itself.

Good luck and do not worry to much about the label.

[GetDownYouWillFall]

I think like a lot of things, mental health is on somewhat of a continuum... there is someone who is not mentally ill, there is someone who is mentally ill, and the rest of us are somewhere in between!

Psychiatry is a bit of a sledge hammer to crack a nut IME, they like to assign "labels" to everything - believe it or not even "happiness" has a clinical term in psychiatry. I said in my last appointment that I have been feeling "happy" and they wrote it down (the term) as a notch lower than "hypomania" - I was a bit .

What I'm trying to say is there is not black and white when it comes to PND. You answer a questionnaire and get a score, but as others have said this can vary from minute to minute, let alone over days or weeks or even months.

Sorry you've got so much on your plate. Sounds like with all you've got to deal with it may well have tipped over into the "depression" end of the scale, but if you feel you are managing and can get through that's fine.

Take care of yourself x

[MathsMadMummy]

BTW there is a new thread, if you're finding it tough to get the day-to-day stuff done, here - just getting dressed is a struggle sometimes, but it's great to chat with others in the same boat. all welcome

[hart]

Hi, I feel just the same. Others don't seem to be affected by the drudge of motherhood like I do. My depression and anger towards my three 3 children and the fact that I dont enjoy it most of the time seem not to be anyone elses problem but mine. Desparate.

[magnummum]

Thanks for your input everyone. I think I will call the HV after the bank holiday and bring the appointment forward. I had been thinking if I could just get a decent nights sleep then everything would be fine but realise now that that probably isn't the case and I need more help. Having looked into PND I have had a lot of the triggers and most of the symptoms so at least feel that I don't just need to pull myself together (have tried) or keep putting a brave face on things (don't think I can for much longer). Thanks again.