I had breast cancer last year and despite being ok now I can’t move on. I just can’t get over what happened despite being over 18 months ago. I found talking about it during treatment very difficult as I didn’t want to burden everyone with it. I genuinely felt everyone would be sick of hearing me talking about cancer, bringing everyone down so I said nothing.
I’ve been a mess since treatment ended and at times haven’t been able to hold in how I feel. I’ve tried to tell my very close friends how I’m feeling now or when I’ve really wanted to share something that’s happened it always ends up with me having to explain why I can’t move on.
I’ve ended up avoiding people, I really can’t face being asked how I am. I know I should just say I’m fine and smile but I feel so awful I just want someone to know or care. When I realise they don’t understand or I’ve been told to think positive, be grateful I’m cured, it leaves me feeling worse.
I’m speaking to a counsellor but I really don’t know where that’s going. I don’t know if I fully understand how it works and worry the counsellor despairs I’m not helping myself enough. Tbh I just want to pull the duvet over my head and leave the world to carry on without me.
Im not sure why I’m posting on here, I just needed to off load it.
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Mental health
So low
7 replies
July56 · 15/09/2020 03:11
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