Dont know

[DaisyDay2]

Feeling really crap today. Theres no real reason. Im hating myself and everything around me. Ive lost my temper two days in a row with the kids. I know kids dont listen but its like im not actually talking just making a noise. With everyone. Everyday. I feel disgusted with myself. I feel physically sick. I want to cut myself open and pull all this bad feeling out. Im failing in everything i do. Im a mess. They all hate me .i havent done anything wrong but cant do anything right. Its all falling apart. I cant keep up. Im too afraid to talk in case its used against me. Feel so alone but im never actually left alone
Just want to hide away

[Wolfiefan]

Can you contact the crisis team? You should be afraid of the illness rather than of seeking help. You can't carry on feeling like this and self harm isn't the answer.

[DaisyDay2]

I dont think I'll hurt myself. I havent done in over 10 years now. But that feeling of wanting to still pops up when i feel like this. I don't know why im posting tbh. I can't talk to anyone else. Whos the crisis team?

[Wolfiefan]

If you have a history of MH issues then you should have a link to the crisis team who can advise you. If not then GP. Are you having any treatment?

[DaisyDay2]

8 years ago i was on antidepressants (dont know what ones). Had counselling then and 2 more times in the years before that. But ive always been too afraid to open up. When i came off the antidepressants i was mannic and failing my course kind of brought me back down. I dont know whats best to do now...

[Wolfiefan]

If you can manage until then I would get a GP appointment urgently. You do need to be honest about how you feel or it won't get any better.

[NolongerAnxiousCarer]

Definafely GP if it can wait til Tues, if not you can go to A&E if you feel unable to keep yourself safe, or call 111 if it's urgent but not immediate. In some areas you can self refer to crisis team, their number should be available online or through your local hospital switchboard. Discuss the manic episode too as if this has happened before ADs might not be the right option and you might need to be refered to someone wiyh more MH experience than your GP.