Desperately need an outlet for my feelings!

[conistonoldwoman]

Have already posted on return to work thread...endured a really crap 6 weeks at home with poor dd's. Not at all feeling refreshed and energised for work. In fact am really worried that I will flip if someone says something that even mildly irritates. Mustering the enthusiasm to teach a class at this moment in time looks impossible. I just keep telling myself it is like an actor walking on stage..try to perform for the required time and then walk out the door and head home.
Loads of stuff churning round and round in my head that I need to offload. Do I see GP first who can arrange suitable counselling.

[Wossisface]

Hi I haven't read any of your previous posts so not sure if I'm giving you wrong sort of advice or experience but I'll share anyway.

I returned to work 2 months ago after having my 2nd dd. I suffered pnd after having her. Mainly suffering with anxiety and hugemood swings and had an awful time of it. I basically had a breakdown and very nearly screwed up my life well and truly.

I was dreading going back to work and really down about it everything got a lot worse leading up to my first day back. The gp up'd my meds and I was tempted by her offer to sign me off sick. But I did return I am a nurse and was thrown into being incharge second shift back. It was amazing I really enjoy going back to work it makes me feel proud I do what I do and makes me feel like I'm me again my meds have been cut right down and I'm hoping to stop them soon.

Im still having counseling as well but I think everyone should, it's done me the world of good.

As I said i don't know your story, my experience shared might be of little relevance but if it does I hope it gives some reassurance to you.

[conistonoldwoman]

Thank you. Your positive feelings at work do encourage me. I don't think I'm suffering any sort of depression, but 2 recent bereavements, one expected and the other( a suicide) horribly unexpected, have served to make my ever increasing frustrations with petty, valueless routines encountered at work, greatly more magnified.
There's all kinds of other stuff that weigh me down and talking to someone on the outside would really help.

[Wossisface]

So sorry to hear of your losses, things must seem trivial when in comparison, hopefully you can find work a good distraction from reality if that makes sense, hopefully providing you with more positivity.

I think counseling after a bereavement Is a very sensible idea and I think it will be worth while.

I really hope that you find it as positive an outlet as I did (that goes for work and therapy). Good luck with your return. I hope you have colleagues/friend at work that you can turn to for support.

And once again sorry to hear of your recent bereavements. Life can be so cruel.

[Wossisface]

I meant to say as well, if work is too much you can give yourself more time, be kind to yourself. Take care.

[JennaP]

Counseling is good and so is having the freedom and space to be able to express your grief. My friend was telling me about a women's workshop she went to in Barcelona. It was women only and she was grieving for her baby as was another women. They were both able to help each other, especially as the rest of the time they were having to be 'strong' at home and work. I can't say that it took her grief away but it definitely helped to share. I know that they do something similar in London, i'll find out and let you know. good luck with your return to work. take care

[conistonoldwoman]

Thank you for your messages. I am in the process of sorting out some counselling...didn't manage to get to work. Hope to start next week.

[JennaP]

I spoke to my friend - she said that course she went to was run by a company called whatbox (www.whatboxtraining.com). She said that the course that she went to was run via a yoga centre but they also have public courses in London just for women. It's not counselling, more techniques for building up our personal resilience so you can cope better and sharing with other women. I'm actually of going myself. Hope this helps and good luck with your first week at work.