Feeling down...got issues...think I need help!

[Ghostie]

So...I thought I was doing really well, DD is 10 weeks old and gorgeous. But, since my DH went back to work, after the school holidays, I've been feeling really alone. I don't know anyone around here with kids and when DD had a bad day, I just feel exhausted and very alone.

I have had depression before and have trouble making and keeping friends (sound like a real sad case I know!) I know I have to go along to some mother and baby groups, but I am just really scared of it, as I basically don't think I am very likeable and don't want the rejection again. When I was in the park the other day, I was introduced to some mums and one of them was a friends future SIL. This friend and I have had some difficulties and when her SIL said "I've heard about you" it made me really paranoid and made me even more nervous about going to local mum's groups. I realise I've been creating lame things to do and talking myself out of going to anything.

I have been having a lot of problems with my mum, who is a constant source of stress, as she suffers from depression (well my brother says she has a personality disorder) and she is incredibly needy. Most people find my mum very difficult and I am terrified that I will turn out like her and replicate the relationship I have with her and she has with her mother.

I am so determinded that I will not be like my mother, but I think that maybe I should talk to someone and hopefully this might give my the confidence to go and meet other mums.

Sorry this all sounds really pathetic!

[Jaybird37]

Not pathetic at all. It is really hard to go from being a woman out in the world to being at home with a baby.

Speak to your GP and also contact your local Surestart for some help and support.