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You know you've been ttc for too long when...

(44 Posts)
nomoremagnolia Thu 14-Aug-08 13:38:33

a) find pregnacare/pg tests in the cupboard that are out of date?
b)...six couples you know have married and had babies in the time you've been ttc?
c)...two different friends who started ttc at the same time or after you have had their first babies and are announcing their second pgs?
d)...all of the above

PicknMix Thu 14-Aug-08 13:56:40

e)...all of the above, plus the phrase from said couples in point (c) "just relax and it'll happen, thats what we did" makes you want to scream and shout and stamp your feet. But you don't. You just smile sweetly and go out to buy yet another 'Congratulations, you've had a baby' card....

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 14:09:10

all of the above plus a very fertile friend asks "have you tried them tablet things I've heard of, there meant to be really good at helping you get pregnant?"

You say what Clomid? "no". Agnus Castrus? "no" Evening primrsose? "No" Starflower? "no" Metformin? "No it's not any of those" replies your friend.

Uh you think, getting excited at the prospect of some new wonder pill thats led to your friends annoying ability to fall pregnant at the drop of a hat.

"I remember" she says "Its folic acid!"

At which point you punch your friend quite hard and sob at the ignorance of the fertile.

nomoremagnolia Thu 14-Aug-08 14:10:43

oh yes and the 'helpful' comments of "I know <3 billion> couples who just stopped trying <after IVF/10 years/they turned 45/other huge milestone> and then they had triplets..."

nomoremagnolia Thu 14-Aug-08 14:11:44

1wish sorry had to laugh at your folic acid one! You've succeeded in cheering me up at least

FruitynNutty Thu 14-Aug-08 14:15:39

(f) When other people (everyone) happen to mention they fell preg within the 1st month of trying and their DP/DH have super sperm angry

Happens on here A LOT sad

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 14:23:22

I'm glad about that nomore and sadly it's a true story. Along with another friend who helpfully suggested I might have more success if I tried bd'ing on day 14 of my cycle. It had worked for her sister apparently!!

I replied that would be nice but I have a 45 day irregular cycle and I don't ovulate and dp's sperm is f**ked. To which she replied "well it worked for my sister, and they had been trying ages, it was at least 8 months I think, it's worth a try!" Ahhhggghh angry envy angry

How are you anyway Nomore I haven't spoken to you for ages. I've been keeping of the ttc threads, it's too painfull. I've given up ttc normally now and i'm due to have IVF in the next couple of months grin Though I'm not excited because I really don't think it will ever happen.

Moonlit Thu 14-Aug-08 14:23:25

....when you finally tell your annoying in laws and friends....'I am having problems please p* off and leave me alone'. smile

Madoldbird Thu 14-Aug-08 14:27:36

You watch "Baby Tales" early in the morning on tv, because that's the closest you can get to giving birth / having a baby... (sadly, i have been known to do this!)

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 14:33:34

You stop watching baby tales in the morning because you no longer see the point

You look at pregnant teenagers, and think to yourself "pregnancy really is a miracle"

They think to themselves, "I really should have got his phone number" grin

nomoremagnolia Thu 14-Aug-08 14:47:28

I'm good (generally at least - having a bad day today) tried IVF but sadly it didn't work for us. Trying to save for another go but have so far managed to save ~£500 (of £4000) so it's still a long way off
I've got another one...when you hear the news about teenage pg rate rising and think "lucky so-and-so's" or alternatively think "but making a baby's so hard how many more are having unprotected sex??"

nomoremagnolia Thu 14-Aug-08 14:49:31

sorry 1wish forgot to ask how you're doing? <how rude!>

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 15:00:26

Sorry to hear that nomore unfortunatly we can't afford it either and our old NHS does no assisted conception what so ever, and the new one has a three year wait.

So I am sad to say this as I know it may help someone else, but I have been forced into donating my eggs as that is the only way we can afford it which makes me very angry and very sad

Anyway back to the thread grin
Another one is when you've exhausted all the anecdotal things that will get you pregnant

1. Have a hsg e-ray (clears your tubes) No luck
2. Have a holiday (relax and it will happen) Nope
3.Start clomid (miracle drug) No success
4.Stop trying (thats when it always happens) No luck
5. Start looking into IVF (everyone always gets pregnant before it starts apparently) Again no...can you see a pattern here?
6. Buy a puppy. Just have done and i'll keep you posted grin

7. Feel sorry for yourself over the amount of time you spent gathering this anecdotal infomation from old threads, friends, tv shows etc

FruitynNutty Thu 14-Aug-08 15:06:03

Well, Iwish I hate to say it as I was also a desperate TTCer but we got a kitten and lo and behold, a few weeks later, I got my much longed for BFP even though I only ovulated twice in a year! Now I know this is a complete coincidence but, another MNer fell preg after getting her kitten too. Of course, don't read too much into it wink

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 15:07:22

1wish rushes out to buy a kitten grin (like the darn puppy isn't enough)

FruitynNutty Thu 14-Aug-08 15:08:51

grin well you'll be so busy with the puppy and kitten that you won't have time for TTC!

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 15:16:22

I'm sad to say I don't any more anyway Fruity.

Thats another one you know you've been ttc to long when...

You no longer have a sex life because-
A.You've been TTC for so long you killed it and
B. If you actually do it, you still spend the next 2 weeks thinking, do I feel sick? What was that twinge? Maybe I am. But you never are, and it drives me insane.

So my theory is no sex, no disapointment. Poor Dp.

ScaryHairy Thu 14-Aug-08 15:20:07

Your mother tells you stories about her friend who had her first child at age 45/46/47 after 20-odd years of ttc in a feeble attempt to buck you up.

You no longer want to smack people who say "I'm so fertile" and giggle. Instead you just look at them and think "cretin".

You can take your BBT in your sleep and are not even surprised when you wake up later on and find out that you have done it.

You get told off by your aunt for telling her teenage daughters to get on with having kids "it's now or never, girls!"

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 15:20:45

I realise I'm destroying the light hearted nature of this thread. Sorry blush

Ladies as you were

funtimewincies Thu 14-Aug-08 15:42:41

Surely you know you've been TTC for too long when your DH suggests that the amount of gymnastics training you've been putting in, desperately trying to get your bum higher than your head after each bout of nookie, that you should be in Beijing this week blush.

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 15:51:40

You go to the doctors and you're actually suprised and a little disapointed when he doesn't ask to examine your cervix grin

nomoremagnolia Thu 14-Aug-08 15:58:40

1wish A friend of my sisters has donated her eggs too (I'm pretty sure it was for financial reasons) - I'm not sure I could do it if I knew the other person had got pg and I hadn't (how selfish am I? blush) - I'm in awe of those who can do that.
I have been known to tell friends to "get on with having children sooner rather than later" too!
Liking the kitten theory - though not too sure what DH or my two existing cats would make of it!

nomoremagnolia Thu 14-Aug-08 16:00:19

oh and that thing about spending time around newborns...bollocks!

nomoremagnolia Thu 14-Aug-08 16:04:13

and when asked to fill in a form about how long you've been ttc you tick the 18-24 months because you think "it's been 2 1/2 years hasn't it? - no that seems too long - must be only 1 1/2" Then you tell DH and he says 'no it has been 2 1/2 years'

1wish Thu 14-Aug-08 16:16:44

It gets worse nomore when you actually start to lie,and shorten the length of time you've been ttc on forms, so that they don't think you're a complete jaffa.

Had to do this recently with the egg donation thing, I put two years but actually it's more like four shock

And I'm not happy about that situation you described either, but what can I do. It makes me feel like i'm in one of those countries where people are forced to sell a kidney or something for money. (Though obviously not as bad, but a similiar principle)

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