Epidural-still can't decide-36 wks pgnt

[laughaminute]

Hi please help me to make an informed decission, have had 2 children and both labours left me 'stuck' for want of a better word @ 9cm dilated and trying not to push for 4 hours with BOTH children, after much discussion it appears that they will not prioritise 'pain' over problematic labours in a hospital,hence my long waits both times for a registrar to tend to my needs-(And this I agree with) hence I was left in a ridiculous amount of pain both times.(Second time far worse too).both times I tried the no pain relief version for as long as I possibly could but second time I simply had to have epidural (9lb 2oz baby back to back-ouch').I have been told it is likely to happen again dure to cervix shape-this really scares me and I am thinking about it daily.Despite all of this I was intending to try for a natural birth right throughout this pregnancy,however, time is rapidly approaching and I am wondering if to simply request epidural on arrival to save all this worry.My reason for not wanting to do this was i felt it was chikens way out and also may slow down my labour thus leading to possible c-section but now I think I am so scared that I ought to have epidural in my birth plan right from point of arrival at delivery suite-opinions please????I won't act on any Mumsnet advice however am interrested in peoples experiences of either situation????Thanks

[mom2latinoboys]

I can't help you because I've never had pain relief and for me it's not something that I would do.

You've given birth before and you know how you cope and what happens. If I were you I would ask for the epidural as soon as you get there.

[mom2latinoboys]

Have you thought about gas and air, tens or pethidine as well. Or are they not available (am in US so they are not available here)

[Sam100]

I had a long back to back labour with dc1 and had an epidural after about 14 hours of very painful contractions (was about 6-7 cms and could not take any more). But then took another 8 hours to go the last few cms and I had top up after top up of epidural, drip and then struggled to push etc etc and ended delivering via ventouse.

Next time round wanted a more "natural" experience and booked into the birth centre - but was also sure in back of my mind that I would not be able to take extreme pain and if it was as hard again as first time that I would go for the epidural. It is not a chickens way out - if the birth is going well then you won't feel like asking for the epidural - if not then its there for pain relief. We are not meant to be martyrs!

Think of it as a 2 scenarios birth plan - if all progressing well then Plan A - natural route. If baby back to back and contractions v painful - then Plan B epidural route.

[laughaminute]

Thanks guys,had TENS,pethedine 1st time (This just calmed me down a bit) but baby went to sleep!TENS and gas & Air both times, this worked to a point, I forgot to point out that it isn't to do with my pain threshold (I think that is quite high-managed 4 hrs fully dialated.)both times I had to have a registrar right at the end to manually flip cervix away with finger-something the midwives tried but couldn't seem to do (Don't know why except that it can be quite a specialised thing to be able to do)This too is very painful but again not classed as high priority if vital stats are OK-once more hence the long wait,plus if left too long cervix swells making the lip even harder to move.(Have written detailed birth plan all surrounding this issue but I know how stretched the delivery suite is so am not filled with confidence that things will happen if I need them to)-last experience left hubby distraught for days afterwards too.-can I ask 'mum2latinoboys,why you wouldnt opt fpr pain relief?I am trying not to but am quite nervous now.

[expatinscotland]

i had an epidural birth and a drug free one.

and i'd take the epidural one ANY DAY.

[laughaminute]

thanks expatinscotland-do you think the epidural slowed your ability to 'help' i.e. push,move etc?

[expatinscotland]

no, i think it gave me back my control.

i felt trapped by the pain. it hurt so much i honestly couldn't focus on anything else.

G&A gave me a panic attack and made me puke.

i also had high blood pressure.

the epi help me relax and focus on getting the baby out.

[madmouse]

Chickening out??? You have already done it twice! By now you are an experienced labourer and you know what you need to get through it.

I had an epidural after five hours gas and air during induction-contractions - best thing ever, could have kissed the aenestesist (sp).

[fingerwoman]

I had the opposite experience to expat.
g&a, pethidine and an epidural followed by ventouse delivery with ds1.

ds2 was back to back, 9lb 5 and I managed it with no pain relief at all.

I much, much preferred ds2's birth. It was almost an enjoyable experience (as much as it can be)

but it is all down to the individual isn't it? if you're in hospital there is no reason you need to decide now, the choice for epidural will be there at the time. I put on my birth plan with ds1 that I was not avewrse to epidural but wanted to decide at the time

I think there are other thigns to consider though. my ds2 was born at home and i was upright the whole time. I tried lying down at one point and immediately knew I could not push this baby out in tha tposition. gravity helps a LOT IME. I was also much more relaxed, being at home I suppose. oh and I stayed really active, I was walking about for as long as poss
I wasn't examined to see how dilated I was when I wanted to push, they let me get on with it- so it could be that your 9cm is when you need to push, and trying not to isn't going to help iyswim????

[orangina]

Totally agree with expat... was having this very conversation with a 1st time mother to be friend of mine today. Agree with needing to feel (somewhat) in control. Being in so much pain is TERRIBLE, and quite traumatic (for me anyway), was able to focus once that pain was removed, and as long as all was well w baby, I frankly didn't care if labour went on longer, i was no longer in a freaked out state of whatever. (Yes, very articulate this evening, sorry!)

[alfiesbabe]

I wouldnt personally go for an epidural, particularly as you've given birth twice before. Every birth is different, so I wouldnt assume that this time round will be problematic. For me, the downsides - increased likelihood of intervention, lack of control over my labour, would outweigh the benefit of pain relief. There are many other forms of pain relief anyway - massage , moving about, TENS, g and a etc.The fact that you've posted suggests that you really arent happy with the epidural route, so why not try without?

[Bluebutterfly]

I am going to with my next one. Had a similarly long and painful labour with ds and I simply do not want to go through that again. Have you looked into a mobile epidural? I have heard about them, but do not know if they are available as standard?

[expatinscotland]

my dd2 was almost born at home.

i even walked down 2 flights of stairs, i wsa that mobile.

i must have been at least 7 cm dilated then, because when i got to hospital about 20 mins. later, i was 9cm.

too late for anything but G&A, which made me sick.

i was on all fours the entire time, even in the back of the car.

it made no difference.

i didn't feel relaxed in that amount of pain.

i gave birth on my knees holding onto the back of the bed. no stitches, only a graze.

even though it was short - dd2 was born about 20 mins. after arrival at hospital - i was deeply traumatised by the pain i felt.

it all depends on the individual, but if YOU are having reservations about giving birth w/o epidural due to your past experiences, then go for one! ask away.

i'll be at hospital asap if this one makes it, asking for my epidural.

[Bluebutterfly]

Also, I had no control really over my labour and that was without an epi - I had tens, g&a, monitor belt on my stomach, then clips inserted onto ds's head whilst still in the birth canal, I was on an oxytocin drip and an iv for fluid. I had tubes and cables coming off of my body everywhere so I couldn't move, intense contractions (oxytocin), a prolonged labour and a large baby. That was without an epidural.

Next time I am going for the epi. There are no guarantees in any labour, but I had nightmares about the pain for over a year post partum. Forget that.

[expatinscotland]

i am astonished that women who have had induced labour or drugs to augment contractions are expected to labour and give birth without epidurals in this country.

[mom2latinoboys]

Why I wouldn't opt for pain relief.

1. I dilate fast and have had relatively fast labors. (less than 7 hours for both, one induction and one natural)

1. In US, at least in my hospital, it's an epidural or nothing. And by the time I felt enough pain with ds1 to warrant asking for one I was 7 cm and could see the light at the end of the tunnel. With ds2 I knew I did it before so decided to do it again.

1. Everyone I know that has opted for the epidural has had a c-section, and that is everyone I know. I'm scared to death of surgery.

Grant it if I were ever in the situation where I had 48 hours of labor and 13 hours of pushing (like my sil, who ended up with a c-section) then I would opt for all the pain relief known to man.

I'm very lucky to have had the births I've had

[expatinscotland]

The csection rate in this country is often FAR lower than in the US.

[fingerwoman]

I'm not surprised you didn't feel relaxed expat, that's some labour!
I think that's maybe the biggest part of why I felt so good about it all was because I was at home and it really made a big difference,.
think if i was dashing down flights of stairs and labouring in the car I'd have prob taken the epidural too lol

[Eeek]

go epidural. They're absolutely fab! You don't get a prize for doing it the hard way. Think about a c-section aswell - I was recently told "you're not too posh to push - you're too old to stretch"

[expatinscotland]

i did NOT want to be at home.

for me, that is not an option i would find relaxing at all.

different strokes for different folks, but homebirth is definitely not an option i'd entertain.

i was glad to be en route to hospital, where i'd hoped to get some adequate pain relief.

[Bluebutterfly]

Expat - even my British gp said that when he visited me when I left the hospital! I actually asked for an epi in labour and was told that I was too far along and that it would slow down my labour. I think they just couldn't be bothered calling the anaethetist because it was after midnight. I laboured for another 3 hours after asking for it anyway. Fortunately I am no longer in the UK, and I am assured that the medical treatment for pgy is amazing here in Luxembourg.

If there is the slightest possibility that you will want an epidural I would put it in your birth plan as a possibility laugh.

[CoteDAzur]

I am mystified by the glorification of birth without epidural in the UK.

[expatinscotland]

if this pregnancy is viable, i am seriously considering going abroad because i'm afraid of being fobbed off when i ask for an epidural or forced to wait hours and hours in pain like i was w/DD1.

[expatinscotland]

So am I, Cote. Even after so many years here.

But then again, I was born via repeat elective csection.