Ok, couple of questions about sex and waterbirths!

[Melly19MummyToBe]

By the way, I don't mean sex and waterbirths together :o

1:- Has anyone gone into labour shortly after having sex?
-Also, is it something in the sperm that helps to start labour?
-And do you need to orgasm?
People have been telling me all sorts and I'm confused!

2:- Has anyone had a waterbirth and what was it like?
-Did it help with the pain or make it worse?
-And did the water go red? I want one, but my DP thinks waterbirths are disgusting and he's "definitely not going to be there if I'm having one of them!), I think he thinks that it's just going to be a bloodbath (literally)

Some help would be nice please ladies :) I'm due on tuesday, so don't take too long! :o

[squiggleywiggler]

1: Yes it can help things along. There are prostaglandins in semen (like the stuff they use to induce you but much less strong) and orgasming can prompt the uterus to contract.

2: IME (and I'm a doula so have seen a few) waterbirths are much less messy than landbirths and you can see less of the up close and personal stuff.

Go for it on both counts!

[ShowOfHands]

No there has never been any proven link between sex and labour starting. The theory is based on the fact that there are prostaglandins in semen but nowhere near enough to induce labour and no research has ever shown it works.

Nothing does largely. Pineapples, curry etc, all old wives tales.

I was in a pool but not to deliver. It was very helpful but yes they do end up bloody if you stay in for delivery.

[vigglewiggle]

I just clicked on this thread to see what you were planning .

Good luck and ditto what squiggly said!

[lilbreeze]

I had some of my first labour in water and it helped with the pain sooo much. Didn't actually give birth in it though so there was no mess. If he's a bit squeamish then water birth is probably better as, like squiggley said, everything's much more hidden.

[mumatron]

I had a water birth and the water does go a bit mucky but only really at the very end ime.

Your dh will be too busy gazing at your new baby to notice what colour the water is.

[amistillsexy]

I'm just wondering what your 'D'P thinks any birth is like?

Does he know that there will, certainly, be blood involved, possibly alot of it, whether you are in a birth pool or not.

If you feel that a water birth will help you, then go for it.

And if he says any more about not being there, tell him he can forget all thoughts of 'helping' things along!

[Backinthebox]

Er, I've bonked a baby out. Sex at 11pm, baby out by 6am. I don't care if there is no scientific link. I used to work in a medical field before my current job, and the amount of stuff out there that works that no one has been able to pin proof on is amazing. Hearsay and conjecture is enough for me to give it a go. And it seemed to work. Baby born on due date, which was a surprise since my first baby was 11 days late and was the least-late baby to be born in at least 3 generations of my family.

And yes, you need to emphasize to your OH that it is very important that you not only get your prostaglandins injection from him, but you have your own little release of oxytocin. Ie, an orgasm. While he's at it, why not ask him to make it a good one - that way you've got something to smile about even if you don't have your baby that night!

[squiggleywiggler]

Love it backinthebox

[ShowOfHands]

Well theoretically if the prostaglandins work you're better off ingesting them orally. In fact research shows that oral ingestion is more frequently associated with labour beginning though still in tiny amounts of cases and not remotely statistically significant.

But it doesn't work. For every one person that has sex and it 'works', there will be thousands more for whom it didn't. Coincidences are like that. And many more, like me, who could claim sitting on the sofa eating rice works.

Have sex if you want to do it. Eat pineapple if you want to do it. It will not cause labour to start but if it keeps you occupied and you want to believe it could, then you're hardly harming anybody.

[QTPie]

Hhhhmmm, there will be blood and yuckiness no matter what type of birth.... Not like your DP needs to get in the pool with you ;)

You might want to work things through with DP - make sure that he is onside, totally supportive and isn't going to dive out of the delivery room when things start getting messy.... If he is likely too, then you want to seriously consider a different birth partner (mum/sister/friend/doula). The birth - and mode of delivery - is "all about you": I am sorry, but he doesn't get a say....

If you are UK based, then - depending on how pregnant you are - seriously look at NCT classes. To be honest, before the birth, the DPs got a lot of benefit out of them (DPs are generally the ones who don't research/read up about childbirth). The ones in our group also used the phrase "we have to man up" - very true!

(NCT group VERY beneficial to women too - we still see each other all the time.... My son is a little over 16 months).

[camdancer]

This is far tmi, but we've been trying sex every other day for 10 days now. Baby still firmly inside at 40+3. It doesn't feel that great because I'm a whale and it is uncomfy, plus I then get hours of braxton hicks' all night so don't sleep that well afterwards.

Also taking raspberry leaf extract tablets. Can't eat pineapple as it is the food of the devil. Trying to do lots of walking but that only brings more braxton hicks'. Basically, the baby will come out when it is ready.

Didn't have a waterbirth so can't comment, but there will be blood, goo and yuck however you have the baby. If your DP can't cope with that, then get another birth partner. You don't need to be worrying about him while you are giving birth.

[Happypapa]

Who's know what will get it going. But if you like curry, pineapple, sex or whatever else it's a nice excuse to indulge while you're feeling big and bored and frustrated!

My wife gave birth at home last week and from a man's point of view I enjoyed the opportunity to support my wife with things like keeping the pool at the right temperature etc. QTPie is right, there will be blood and poo and all sorts of stuff but you know what, something about it made me feel closer to my wife than ever. This was the birth of our first child and the only pain relief my wife had was the water. She said it made an enormous difference. You can tell you DP from me man-to-man that he'll be far to busy worrying about whether you're alright and looking at his new baby to even notice the colour of the water. I emptied the pool and cleaned up as well and it cam with a little pump that empties it and then I just held the ling above the loo so that whatever was left went to to a point at the bottom, cut it with some scissors, poured it into the loo, flushed, then put the lining in a bin bag and that was it. It's gruesome but my goodness, if you can be comfortable with that stuff then you'll be a lot more relaxed with each other in general I think.

[CalmInsomniac]

I had a water birth. Not very messy actually. I think there was some bloody show on the bottom of the pool. My waters went in the pool so no mess from that.
There wasn't really any blood when the baby came out, and the pool was still so clean my DH jumped straight in with me so he could hold our DD when she was still attached to me.
I got out to deliver the placenta. That was a bit more messy. But the MWs contained everything and only left one spot of blood on the carpet.

[Melly19MummyToBe]

I'm very pregnant, I'm due on tuesday :o

RE birth partners, I have also asked my sister to come as I don't fully trust my DP not to faint/throw up/run out the room.

My sister told me the other day that she went into labour half an hour after having sex. I think when that happens it must just be a coincidence thing really, because, as you say SOH, for every one person it works for, it won't for thousands of others.

I'm still in 2 minds whether I want a waterbirth or not. I think I do. Although a few people I've spoken to about it said that they had a bath when they were in labour and it just made the pain worse, has anyone else had this with a waterbirth?

[belfast80]

I had a waterbirth on Fri 3rd June and would highly recommend it. I was keeping an open mind about pain relief and thought I would try it but was ready to jump out for an epidural if needed! I went to hospital at 10.30am, found I was 5cms, got into the pool at around 3pm with my own music playing and had my beautiful DS, Rudy, at 5.54pm (7lbs 13oz - 17 days early!). I had gas and air throughout, apart from when pushing, and despite a few panicky moments when I thought I couldnt push him out, DP and my mum said it was very calm (although it didnt feel like that to me at the time!). It was very bloody in the water at the end but the midwife said I had moderate - high blood loss so you may not have a similar experience to me but more like CalmInsomniac above. I had a 2nd degree tear with just two stitches and was out of hospital by 5pm on Saturday. I can honestly say the labour (which I was dreading and anxious about) could not have gone better and I firmly believe the water was the thing that got me through. If I have any more children I would definately try for a waterbirth.

[gourd]

1. No, not for us - though we did have sex the day before LO arrived so make of that what you will. She was born at 39+6, a day early.
   
2. Home water birth with 1st and only baby. Whole labour was about 2.5 hours. Water didn't go red but there were a few floaty bits (from my waters breaking) and some blood - I didn't lose much though, only 50ml according to my notes. To be honest, we didn't really notice - the birth of our beautiful daughter was kind of distracting! No pain relief needed except the warm water which was bliss and yes it took away almost all the pain of the contractions. The crowning stung a bit but not too bad, just a very odd feeling when baby started moving and turning around as she emerged! I didn't tear.

[porpoisefull]

1. Er yes - lots of blood came out just after the baby and it looked "like a shark attack" but you do get a lovely clean baby - there was no blood on him at all!

[PrincessJenga]

Oh dear, does DP know there is likely to be POO as well? I hope he doesn't pass out on you

[sarahb16]

I had a water birth last July & I'm hoping to do the same again in August. I found the water very soothing & it helped a bit with the pain. Not too much mess either. Go for it!

[LuckyMrsT]

I had a waterbirth - very similar experience to CalmInsomniac. The water stayed clear and I only noticed blood on the bottom of the pool when I got out. I've only given birth once so can't compare it to anything else but the thought of doing it without the support of the water underneath me doesn't appeal. Think everyone is right about your DP needing to come to terms with the fact that there will me a litlle mess... Good luck (go for it)

[Jezabella]

I also had a waterbirth and for me the water was clear right up until DD was fully out. Then the water did go red with blood but tbh DH and I were far too busy marvelling at brand new DD (who was scrunched up and mauve!) to notice.

FWIW, DH wasn't worried about finding the blood etc. disgusting as such (or so he said!) but was more worried of feeling squeamish - but he said afterwards that when it came down to it, the whole experience seemed totally normal and natural, and he was even able to cope with seeing the placenta coming out etc.

[maxbear]

I've had three waterbirths all of which started shortly after sex with nipple stimulation to try and get things going.

With dc1 & 3 water didn't go red, with dc2 it went very red. Can be quite gross really I mean anything that might end up in the toilet could end up in the pool, but it really helps you to relax!

[cheapFlower]

1. no
   
2. had 2 waterbirth. with DC1 I bleed quite a bit and the water had a quite a pinkish tinge. with DC2 I hardly bled and the water as crystal clear...
   water did not help with the pain but help me to change position.
   
   your DP sounds strange - what does he think childbirth is like? and does he think there won't be blood if you give birth on land?

[wannaBe]

well, I had sex on the advice of the obstitrician, as we walked out of the room she turned to dh and said "well, it's ahem up to you now sir." and within an hour I was in labour. contractions started at 12:30, hospital by 3:30 and was already 8 cm dilated.

to add to that though, I didn't have a water birth, but I had read somewhere that water can help with the pain, so at about 2:00 I went and had a bath, my contractions were six minutes apart before I got in the water, was in the water for fifteen minutes and by the time I got out contractions were two minutes apart and I was lying on the bathroom floor begging dh to ring the hospital and then my mum to come and drive us (we don't drive).

so there's my experiences of sex and water all in one night.