2.3 DD will only eat:
Pasta with various sauces
Fishfingers
All fruit inc dried
Ham / cheese / toast
Porridge
Milk
Yoghurt
Any sweet treat I give her on occasion.
Until she was about 18 mths she ate everything I cooked. She eats everything put in front of her 3 days a week at nursery. I've tried reproducing their recipes but she just screams and won't even try it.
I have had great advice about still serving the things she claims not to like and not reacting or offering alternatives and I've worked very hard to fight my feelings in this respect.
Does anyone know when it will ever get any better though? 9 months of throwing her dinner away where it isn't from her approved list is getting me down.
It's so bad now that if I choose something different she even objects to me eating 'yukky' food and gets upset about that.
Is there anything else I should be doing?
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Behaviour/development
Toddler Food Refusal.
PastaandCheese · 05/02/2014 13:12
Yeah it's difficult to say the least! My DD is 22months and eats very little variety if she had her way it'd be breadsticks breakfast lunch & dinner! Plus she will chug down fruit pouches but refuses actual fruit I poker facely offer her a piece of fruit everyday but she just plays with it but I'm sticking at it, and trying to follow the advice in the book.
Today she refused spaghetti that DH made (which she loves) and as I calmly removed it and lifted her down from the table she wondered over and pointed to the breadsticks arghhhhhhhh! So the breadstick have now been moved. So by trying not to create a battle we ended up in one anyway. I'm just hoping its a phase that will pass and as she's cutting her canines at the mo am giving her the benefit of the doubt! She is also in a phase of throwing her comfort toy out of the cot at nap times and through the night! It's just one fun phase after another with her 
My youngest is 2.3 too - its a nightmare age for eating and other eating related behaviour like sitting at the table, not chucking food around, not shampooing your hair with yoghurt ...
My eldest was the same too at this age.
Its very frustrating but they are programmed to be like this - it is normal and indeed its a necessary stage. They are fighting to establish control and their sense of self. Its a very important fight for them, and one which you won't be able to win.
With my son my policy is to not allow bad behaviour like chucking stuff around (I remove it) but I don't spend ages trying to get him to eat. Its up to him.
She won't be like this forever, can't remember when my eldest calmed down, in general by the time she turned three, I think, things were rather more civilised.
Do you notice she is especially challenging in the evening? My son is good at breakfast and lunch - eats well and nicely. Supper different
Look, you can't make any one eat. But you are in control of what is offered. I think it is v nb not to hand total choice of eating over to a batty 2yo!
So keep presenting the range of food you want them to eat. If you think they really won't eat the meal, perhaps have some limited alternatives on the table.
Don't feed them anything in the hour before the meal is due.
If they say they are hungry remind them how much they will enjoy their dinner.
If they say they don't like it I say nb to eat a little bit of everything and I encourage one tiny bite. I also say they just haven't tried it enough .
I also ask what their tummy says. If they really won't eat I let it go but give v little then until the next meal.
Ime they seem able to thrive on far less food that you would think. Keep the range there and when they come out of the non eating funk they will be used to seeing lots of food and there being an expectation it will be eaten.
Ds was at this stage for about 18m though and dd is currently at it about 9m. So it is a long haul.
Oh and we make everyone sit at the table even if not eating. We tell them we like their company dd especially will often absent mindedly eat a bit that way.
Both of my dc are like this at the moment, and it's definitely worse in the evenings when they're tired 
We try not to fuss about the issue; they will still usually be offered pudding (fruit and yoghurt). We leave their meal beside them and they often pick at it after they've had a bit of pudding. They leave the table when they've had enough but often return a few minutes later for another nibble.
It is so frustrating when we've cooked something that they normally wolf down, and they barely touch it though! We continue to offer them the things they dislike, but without coercion- it's just there and if they don't eat it I eat it, that's ok.
This method has just resulted in a minor victory for us- dd (3.10) has always hated eggs but has recently started to ask for some egg on her plate when we have them for lunch. She only takes one tiny bite but that's progress!
Luckily they both love fruit and most vegetables.
I have a friend who makes her dc eat a certain amount from their plate before they're allowed to stop, even when they're getting upset about it. It makes mealtimes a battle in their family and I think my dc still eat more overall and a wider variety than hers, despite my more relaxed approach.
Oh and we make everyone sit at the table even if not eating. We tell them we like their company grin dd especially will often absent mindedly eat a bit that way.
That's lovely and makes for much more enjoyable mealtimes.
dd (3.10) has always hated eggs but has recently started to ask for some egg on her plate
That's when you know your approach is really working and you're setting your child up to have a great attitude to food 
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