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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

Will you just GO TO FUCKING SLEEP

26 replies

BertieBotts · 21/10/2012 21:35

DS sat on the sofa, now, laughing at me.

I have done my scariest cross voice. I have taken him back to bed 100 times, but his stamina outweighs my patience. I've confiscated toys. Sat with him. Let him have a (plain) snack.

And now he's just laughing at me and I'm crying and I have no idea what to fucking do with him. How do other people know this stuff?

OP posts:

Report

Seriouslysleepdeprived · 21/10/2012 21:42

No advice but I've been trying to get my 6 month old DS to sleep since 6pm. He just keeps babbling and smiling. I've fed him three times now in the hope he would drop off but instead it seems to be fuelling him...surely he must be tired soon

Iggly · 21/10/2012 21:42

How old?

CuriosityColaKilledTheCat · 21/10/2012 21:43

How old is he?

knackeredmother · 21/10/2012 21:43

Mine are giving each other piggy backs round the bedroom as we speak. I've given up.

DinosaursOnASpaceship · 21/10/2012 21:50

It's taken me 2 hours to get my 16 month old to sleep. I shouted at him for the first time ever, and then I cried, he cried and then he stopped crying and went back to trying to jump out of bed whilst I begged. Now he's asleep and I feel horribly guilty and want to wake him up to tell him how much I love him and how sorry I am for shouting.

BertieBotts · 21/10/2012 21:51

Four. And he has nursery in the morning and I have work, and haven't eaten yet.

OP posts:

Iggly · 21/10/2012 21:53

:(

I remember ds going through a stage like that around 15-18 months. In the end I'd have to be quite firm and tell him to sleep and leave the room for a few mins then come back after 5 mins, leave again if not settling etc. I'd go back in quickly if upset but he'd normally just shout not cry. It was awful but he seemed to react better if I explained it was sleep time and left instead of getting wound up.

notactuallyme · 21/10/2012 21:54

I hear ya. The two room sharers are dreadful. No advice. (Sorry)

BertieBotts · 21/10/2012 22:00

Argh.

I wish DP was here :(

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PoppyScarer · 21/10/2012 22:02

Watch this...at least you'll have a giggle from it!

BertieBotts · 21/10/2012 22:06

Haha thanks Poppy but he's in the room I've seen it before though

OP posts:

Meglet · 21/10/2012 22:13

You have my sympathy. DD was a fucking nightmare last year, we peaked at 60+ rapid returns and I gave up 2 weeks later when it had got down to 20. I was sick of not eating and spending my whole evening on the bloody landing in the dark.

She's slightly better now, but still messes about for 30mins or so. I just shout and try and get on with everything I have to do.

NotGeoffVader · 21/10/2012 22:17

We're having one of those nights with DD (20 months). Every time I try to get her to settle she keeps getting up, chatting, wriggling about, flinging the dummy around, snivelling and shrieking. We're just onto round three as I got cross earlier and hauled her into the lounge with us so I could have something to eat before my stomach imploded with hunger. :(

Zombieminx · 21/10/2012 22:27

Fwiw I would not allow him to stay up with you.

He needs to be in his bedroom...And you need your evening!

Keep putting him back to bed. Be consistent, he needs to know that if he keeps trying it on that you won't eventually give in to him! suggestion for technique here

My little pickle refused to go to sleep till about 9.30 tonight - but at least she was in her room... Meant I could get stuff packed up and ready for the morning at least. .

I hope tomorrow night is better

NotGeoffVader · 21/10/2012 22:56

I long for DD to have her own room... but we are in a one-bedroomed flat.
She's been in with DH for the last half hour (I had to pop in as there was a bout of hysterical wailing -from her, but wouldn't be surprised if it was from him!) - and it's been quiet for the last ten minutes.
I am hiding at the computer on the pretext of doing some research... which I am doing, but am also here for the sake of my sanity.

CuriosityKilledTheCrap · 21/10/2012 22:59

Oh god - there's something in the air! I've already hijacked someone else's thread in behaviour/development about this.

It's just fucking torturous when they won't go to sleep isn't it? Then the minute they are in racked with guilt about getting so cross.

Tincletoes · 21/10/2012 23:09

Has he had a nap today? Is there a reason that he's not tired? Or is he just being a pain?

If I've let my nearly 4 year old have a nap during the day and so it's just that he can't sleep, then I'd probably give in and let him sit with us for a bit. If on the other hand I know he's tired and is just pushing boundaries, then I'd do the whole tedious putting him back in bed x 100 thing.

I realise both options are tedious and really sympathise. In both situations I'd open the wine!

colditz · 21/10/2012 23:11

It's bedtime. NOW.

for you too.

Lock up, switch everything off, including at the fuse box if necessary, put him in his bedroom, close his door and go to bed. Ignore him after you have said goodnight.

WidowWadman · 21/10/2012 23:23

BertieBotts · 21/10/2012 23:37

Thanks all for sympathy etc. Am in bed now, he finally went to sleep at about 10.30.

I think he was just having a bit of a horrendous day TBH, he had an utter meltdown at teatime where he scratched me repeatedly in the face, and barely ate and then this too. Probably thinking about it, a result of the hungry/tired death cycle which always makes me feel a bit of a failure. He was with GPs today so mealtimes might have been a bit out of his usual routine.

I don't know- he usually stays in bed or at least his room, so I think I was reacting to that more than anything, and he just won't stay and I cannot snap because I get really mean - scary shouty and wanting to swear (hence thread title) and generally pushy (physically) which isn't fair on him however he's being. I can do the returning him and returning him thing but his stamina way, way outpasses my trigger point for this. It's easier when DP is here as we give each other a break. Or when he couldn't get over the bottom stairgate!

Anyway, tomorrow is a new day, will keep eye out for hungry/tired cycle and try to nip in the bud another time. And sleep time for me now.

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GimmeIrnBru · 22/10/2012 11:20

Don't talk to him. That's giving him attention and then he'll play up because of that. Just physically lift him up to bed. Don't get into a battle about it. I couldn't put up with that, you honestly need your space BertieBotts!!

I think perhaps he was overtired from the rest of the details you've revealed so far. Sharp bed time always works - 6.30 or 7pm works well for most of this age group. If you leave them up too long you'll just have a battle on your hands. I've learned the hard way myself!

Goldmandra · 22/10/2012 12:03

He'll stay in bed when you decide that your stamina has to outlast his.

Does he need a later bedtime? Is he scared of something?

He is old enough to stay in bed and enjoy some books while he settles if he's not ready for sleep straight away.

Have you tried leaving an audio book playing for him to listen to as he falls asleep?

I will never forget being on my knees with exhaustion watching DD1 rolling around the room aged about four or five months having a lovely smiley time at 11.30pm. She had been awake most of the previous few months night, had woken early and not slept all day. I was beginning to believe that she was possessed and couldn't understand why other people had babies who slept and mine didn't.

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Kalisi · 22/10/2012 17:59

He spent the day with GP's?? Say no more, mine always returns a shit handful when GP's have been spoiling nurturing him all day.

BertieBotts · 22/10/2012 21:53

I'm starting to think growth spurt - he ate an entire pizza for dinner tonight followed by popcorn which he munched on from dinner until bedtime, and said he was full. Only slight blip at bedtime when he said he was hungry I could hear his tummy rumbling, so I said he could have some toast but then teeth brushed again and straight up to bed and he ate two slices and then fell asleep in about 5 minutes flat.

That's why it was so out of character - usually he DOES sit quietly in his room if he can't sleep - he must have been starving

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troubador · 22/10/2012 21:59

If mine are brewing for something I get them up the stairs and onto the bedtime routine a good 45 mins earlier than normal. They have no idea what time it is (at two and four). DD1 was in bed being read her story at 5:45 this evening as I knew she was onto one.

Don't be afraid to send him up waaaaay early if you anticipate a shitty bedtime. Your evening is sacrosanct and so is his sleep.

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