This might sound harsh but right now it's how I feel. I know I probably won't feel like this tomorrow or next week, and I didn't feel like it yesterday, but today I really didn't like my son. From the moment he got up to the moment he went to bed, he has bullied me, shouted at me, hit me, stabbed me with cutlery, sticks -anything he could lay his hands on, in fact. Upon reducing me to tears, he laughed at me. He's made me shout so hard, I'm hoarse. I can hardly move my head as I write this becuase of the tension in my neck. I feel ten years older. I feel like a terrible mother. I feel guilty for counting down the minutes until he goes to pre-school and for that sinking feeling when it's time to pick him up. I feel ashamed for sometimes not being able to be the bigger person and instead sinking to his level. I wish I could have a reasonable conversation with him, I wish I didn't have to repeat every request twenty times, I wish he didn't make me yell at him in public. I wish he would just stop for one second and LISTEN TO ME. I wish he could sometimes just show that he loves me and appreciates my existence. Is it too much to ask? Am I wrong to dislike my son? Does anybody else ever feel the same? Sorry - just a really bad day.
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Behaviour/development
Age of 3 a very difficult one ime.
The only approach that I found helped was the brisk good humoured one:
removing any object used inappropriately at once
grabbing hands the moment they tried to hit
trying not to repeat a request but simply to move on and make things happen (even if that meant dressing them and leading them out of the house by hand)
repeating laughingly some pet mantra ("sorry love, but I am in charge of this show, you know")
but (insofar as possible) never descending from my godlike position to shout.
On the days I could manage this, I pretty well kept my head above water. The other days...well, those I would prefer to forget about. 
Agree with Shanahan - my DS2 at that age needed lots of structure and supervision, if left to his own devices he would create mischief! I know it's really hard, and we all have days that are terrible, but I've found that it really helps to accentuate the positive rather than dwelling on the bad behaviour. So, instead of nagging him, try to congratulate him on something good that he's done, even a tiny thing like holding your hand while you cross the road, or being patient while you were at the shops. Giving him little positive responses will make him see that good behaviour = nice mummy rather than shouty mummy and hopefully he'll want to do more good things and get more praise 
Good luck!!
My son was like this at 3 and it was truly awful. I did have days that I didn't like him. I also felt I aged 10 years! He is 4 now and a totally different child and I really miss him now he is at school.
You could speak to your HV about a parenting course. I was sopposed to do one and never got around to it. She did give me the book that went with the course. It was the webster stratton programme. If you can't get hold of a copy you could borrow mine. 
My mum once said to me 'I love you but I'm not sure I always like you'. Now we could get into the politics of actually saying that to your child (I would NEVER say that to one of mine), but over 11 years and 3 DS' I can say I have thought that about all of them at some stage and had a little internal smile.
It's tough, I'm there at 3.5 with my last ever youngest and it's hard as buggery some days, I let him have a day home so we could go swimming today and regretted it a few times. Hang in there, they get older and easier before you realise it.
My hardest 3 year old is now nearly 11 and the sweetest, most helpful child ever and fortunately bringing up DS3 for me as he has a lot more patience 
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i have spent a lot of time in the last year really disliking the behaviour of my nearly 4yr old. we are now coming out the other side and i really enjoy his company now. i have always loved him and would do anything for him, but if day after day they dominate the whole family by their deliberately unkind behaviour towards others, if your unable to take them anywhere without their wild outragous behaviour ruining everything then i think its understandable to dislike the child.
the constant battles, the draining feeling,the desperate for them to be in bed so that your blood pressure comes down a little.....i really identify with that feeling.
go and have a look at him sleeping and give him a kiss, you do love him and hopefully things will be better in the future
Hi Smashers
Have had a trying day with my 3 YO, so know EXACTLY where you're coming from - I'm with my 2 6 am - 8 pm (have 11-month-old DD2 who gets totally overlooked, poor soul) so rather feel such feelings are normal, regardless of what anyone else might say - only you know your situation.
I was passed on a US book called 'Your 3 year old' with the telling tagline, 'Friend or Enemy' (it comes up if you search 'your 3 year old on amazon) - found it really helpful, not so much for resolving behaviour, but more for reassuring me that it IS normal for 3 year olds to challenge you all over the place and to expect most of it to be directed at you as their mum. So I keep trying to remind myself of that. Also it amused me that their top tip was not to beat yourself up over handing your child over to other people/preschool to help out as they'll tend not to get the same behaviour. Dropped DD off at preschool this morning and they were eulogising about how lovely she is - she started kicking off in car on way home and it carried on all afternoon/evening....
Don't know if you have family locally? I don't, but love preschool! Take whatever help you can - I do feel a bit sad sometimes that we are at loggerheads so much but there are good times, and it's lovely when they happen.
I have lots of friends with similar aged children who don't have the same issues, so tend not to go to them for advice, on grounds that they don't know what it's like. Adults are different to one another, os are children. I think the main thing to remember is that it IS just a stage, it's nothing personal just that you are 'mummy' the entity (!) and that it will pass. One of the best tips I had is from a friend of mine who's a mum of 4, who pointed out that some of the qualities that we complain about most with children are those which we admire most in adults.
Good luck - and be kind to yourself. Oh, and if it helps, I too feel like a terrible mother several times a day - think you're besieged by guilt whatever you do.
ps - love wider's tip about giving sleeping child a kiss - that does make you realise it is all worth it and that they are lovely
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I would say that it IS very normal to feel like this at times. That's why people need to get away for a break sometimes. That's why you always see it recommended to struggling parents to get away and have some quality time away from their kids. They ARE bloody hard work sometimes. Not all kids are like this, but some are, and it is a struggle. My first was very very trying. My second has been utterly laid back and loving. I love them both feircely, but yes,there have been times when I haven't enjoyed their company very much and Ive been on countdown to bed time.
This will pass, and he will get easier. IN the mean time, look at ways you can manage your own shouting (I have tended to get shouty, and it just revs them up more, its not helpful). I found "Raising boys" really helpful, but I think Steve Biddulph is a matter of choice! At one point that book was in the bathroom and I would go and read a bit while having a wee lol! It just kept me sane. Also second getting out and doing more with him, this behavour never seems so bad when you are out in the park or where ever. I would avoid playgroups unless you know a very supportive one, as sometimes when your kids are going through stages like this, being at playgroups can bring a whole new level of stress to the situation! Try things like playdough and paint at home, if hes into prodding and hitting - keep his hands busy .
You ARE normal. Try not to worry, just get yopurself a plan of action and try it out, it will help you to feel more in control
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