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to want to deck the manager of a West End cinema?

(42 Posts)
lottiejenkins Wed 26-Aug-09 18:55:33

Last night i took my son to the cinema in the West End while we were in London for the night.... So far so good. He is very over excitable (ADHD) and profoundly deaf so isnt aware of how much noise he makes........ He was quite noisy while we were queueing up, when we went to go down to the screening the manager of the cinema called me to one side and said "Madam your son wont make too much noise in there and disturb the other patrons will he?" shock I was quite upset understandably and said "Trust me he wont be!" I have been to the cinema with him before and there have been people in there who have made more noise than he does! AIBU to be upset??

LaurieFairyCake Wed 26-Aug-09 18:57:26

But he was polite?

I can see nothing to complain about if that's all he said - it's a perfectly reasonable question to ask if he's noisy in the queue surely?

bibbitybobbityhat Wed 26-Aug-09 18:58:56

Unfortunately the manager of the cinema is not aware of your sons conditions, is he?

Please don't be upset because strangers are (literally) ignorant of your particular circumstances.

It sounds like he was rather polite when addressing you, Madam smile.

lottiejenkins Wed 26-Aug-09 18:59:48

I forgot to say he knew my son was deaf because he had been watching him signing!

KIMItheThreadSlayer Wed 26-Aug-09 19:00:44

Sorry but I think you are being a little unreasonable as he had no idea about your sons needs at the time of asking you. Does not sound as if he was rude to you in the least.

hercules1 Wed 26-Aug-09 19:02:41

THe manager doesnt sound unreasonable at all.

YouLukaPrettyAmazing Wed 26-Aug-09 19:03:07

I would be upset too Lottie, even if it was unreasonable to be so
Did you enjoy the film?

vjg13 Wed 26-Aug-09 19:20:26

I think the manager should have waited to see if there was a problem when the film was actually on rather than saying this. YANBU!

Lots of kids are very excited when waiting to get tickets too. My daughter has LD and can be very loud but does calm down once it's dark.

I was put off having a party for her at our local cineworld cinema becuase of the poor attitude displayed by the staff when I mentioned a group of 10 kids with special needs. sad

junglist1 Wed 26-Aug-09 19:20:38

Instead of panicking straight away maybe he could have waited and kept an eye once they were inside? My 6 year old is a complete madman but will zip up when the lights go down

bruxeur Wed 26-Aug-09 19:23:33

In what way on earth is politely asking "Madam your son wont make too much noise in there and disturb the other patrons will he?" panicking?

violethill Wed 26-Aug-09 19:33:17

All sounds very reasonable to me.

The manager has a job to do, which is to ensure the enjoyment of everyone at the cinema, and he was doing his best, politely to carry out his job.

If that had been my child, I'd have responded politely and said ' No I think everything will be fine thanks'. Not wanted to punch him. hmm

junglist1 Wed 26-Aug-09 19:44:09

Because he jumped on them before they'd even gone in. He made assumptions that didn't need to be made. That's not polite at all. It's saying he thinks the child is about to ruin the film for everyone else

chegirl Wed 26-Aug-09 19:44:35


He was assuming that your son would be a problem. When he was asking 'will your son make too much noise' he meant 'I think your son will make too much noise'.

This could be applicable to all children and we dont all get asked this when we are taking our children to the cinema. Generally staff wait and see if there is going to be a problem before acting.

Wouldnt the other posters be a bit hmm if this had happened to them because they had a chattering child with them. Would you not expect to be trusted to keep your child under control? Wouldnt it piss you off if someone assumed you were going to allow your child to jump around and shout?


junglist1 Wed 26-Aug-09 19:46:07

Whappen che we are agreeing yet again grin

allaboutme Wed 26-Aug-09 19:46:55

totally agree with Chegirl
He should have waited to see if there would be a problem rather than assuming there would be one!

LaurieFairyCake Wed 26-Aug-09 19:47:05

Er no.. he was already being noisy in the queue - perfectly reasonable to ask if it was likely he would continue.

he is not saying he 'thinks the child is going to ruin the film' he is politely asking a question.

Just cos people get all defensive and make stuff up in their heads doesn't change the fact that he only asked a question.

junglist1 Wed 26-Aug-09 19:49:38

No no no no. He made up something in his head

TotalChaos Wed 26-Aug-09 19:49:43

agree with Chegirl and Junglist. YANBU.

LaurieFairyCake Wed 26-Aug-09 19:52:31

How did he make up 'quite noisy while we were queueing up' in his head hmm

Child was noisy.
Manager asked if it was likely to continue inside.
Mum said No.
All accepted.

junglist1 Wed 26-Aug-09 19:55:23

I was just about to log off aswell. Dammit.
But she is left wanting to deck him so is offended.
OP maybe don't deck him, maybe a pinch or something grin

bruxeur Wed 26-Aug-09 19:56:28

Perhaps some people are just mindless thugs who can only respond to a situation violently?

junglist1 Wed 26-Aug-09 19:58:14

Come on we have all decked someone in our imaginations. Haven't we....

lottiejenkins Wed 26-Aug-09 19:58:34

Ok perhaps saying i wanted to punch him was being a bit over the top! blush It was the way he assumed my son wasnt going to behave himself !

lottiejenkins Wed 26-Aug-09 19:59:40

FGS Bruxeur I wouldnt have really punched anyone! Particularly not if i had my son with me! It was a way of saying i was unhappy with him!

vjg13 Wed 26-Aug-09 20:01:46

Lottie, I don't think anyone thought you were serious! wink

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