I really do not mean this in a hostile way. But I know someone whose boyfriend says he was raped by a woman and I just cant get my head around it.
The circumstances were they were friends, she wanted more, he didnt. He told her so. Then one night they got high together and had pretty standard vaginal sex that she initiated by making the first move. He was by his own admission on top for at least part of the sex.
He then said the next day she raped him because she knew what his wishes were and she turned him on while in a drugged up state knowing he couldnt act on his principles.
Now I understand he regrets what happened and I dont personally think either of them are on a moral highground & also probably not top of the IQ charts - I say this because I have the wider picture of this guy generally drifting around doing bugger all while he smokes pot and rants about the man. All of which done singly is acceptable but when combined for years on end does somewhat detract from your intellectual appeal factor. So it is just as fair for a guy to regret sex as a girl, we are all susceptible to doing stupid things under the influence. I see that as unfortunate but not necessarily rape. I mean, if he had an erection and was on top its hard to call it that surely? Or am I being really sexist without realising it? Of course a man can be raped but like that??
Been bugging me for years actually this all happened many years ago & the guy went to rape support groups and everything.
So AIBU?
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Please
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AIBU?
to think this is not an example of rape?
81 replies
hereidrawtheline · 23/07/2009 23:23
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