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Did you marry/settle down with the love of your life?

(82 Posts)
EdinburghFirstTimer Tue 26-May-20 15:35:42

Or did you end up with someone else?

Do you have any regrets?

Are you still in touch with any ‘The One’ exes?

Do you miss sex with an amazing ex?

OP’s posts: |
zscaler Tue 26-May-20 15:47:29

Married the love of my life. No regrets (least of all about the sex). Can’t imagine how anyone could be better suited, or just a better person generally.

francienolan Tue 26-May-20 16:07:41

Married the one! Honestly looking back I'm so glad I didn't end up with any of my exes. There are real reasons we all broke up.

MarieQueenofScots Tue 26-May-20 16:08:20

No but then I don’t believe in the concept of “the one” smile

AndNoneForGretchenWieners Tue 26-May-20 16:10:30

I've only had two proper relationships but I feel I married 'the one' - so much so that I won't ever look for another relationship now, because nobody will measure up to my DH. I had a horrific experience with my first relationship so that tells me I have a 50% chance of attracting another violent arsehole. Don't want to risk that and would feel like I was being unfaithful to DH.

CanofCant Tue 26-May-20 16:12:11

My life's yet to end so he might not be the love of it after all! wink

We are very well suited, he is very supportive of me as a person and a great partner and dad. I have 'grass is greener' moments, I think everyone does but I'm not naive enough to think there is any truth in them.

Friendsofmine Tue 26-May-20 16:16:28

I married mine and was very happy until an external event. I never saw myself with anyone else.

However I don't believe one can only be happy with one particular person.

Are you looking outside of your relationship OP? If so be warned of grass is greener syndrome wink

Yearcat13 Tue 26-May-20 16:22:24

No. My one died. But I dont believe in the one. There are lots of ones, potentially.
I settled down and live with myself. So for now I'm my one.

Lots of people I know are with the one they cant be bothered to leave because its pleasant enough and they are fearful of being alone because they've never had to nurture being alone. And it takes nurturing and unlike one ones can never be taken away.

KylieKoKo Tue 26-May-20 16:24:14

Definitely. I didn't believe in the one til I met dp.

MyDogPatch Tue 26-May-20 16:44:23

I didn't.
I've had two serious relationships in my life. The first partner was a liar, a cheat and a thief. I was young and impressionable and unfortunately it damaged my perspective on sex and relationships.

My second is now my husband. He's stuck around for 20 years even though he probably should have walked away 10 or 15 years ago, because I am not good at dealing with the physical side of a relationship. I can be cold and frigid. Partly to do with my upbringing, partly to do with my anxiety and introversion, partly due to the t**t who ruined my first sexual relationship. I admit I settled for my husband because he is good, and kind and a total opposite to the first man. I love him very much now, but we have had lots and lots of problems over the years. He loves me too much and is loyal to a fault.

I have met many men who I have got on fantastically well with since I've been with my husband and if I wasn't attached might have asked them out. One of them might have been a soulmate, who knows? I did settle at a very young age, and I should have "played the field" more, but I am very shy, and get anxious around new people.

If the above sounds awful, then I don't mean it to be! It's just how things have turned out.

flouncymcflouncerson Tue 26-May-20 16:47:49

I married mine. I’d been engaged before but we split due to him cheating. I’m on my own now as my husband died a few years ago, he was 33. I hope I’m not single for the rest of my life now!

sqirrelfriends Tue 26-May-20 16:50:45

I don't really believe in "the one" but I'm very happy that I settled down with DH. While none of my ex's were terrible, they weren't right for me and I am so glad we broke up.

One in particular I shudder at the thought of being married to. He wasn't a bad person but he was a massive mummy's boy and was never expected to do anything resembling housework.

BeebSleeve Tue 26-May-20 17:20:32

Had a difficult upbringing, so set very high standards for the sort of partner I would accept, given that I had no interest in dealing with being treated badly again.

Got asked our multiple times, but always by people that I could see things not working out with, so I always declined. Given how fussy I am, I figured I'd be single forever.

DH appeared at a time in my life in which I wasn't expecting to be dating anyone, and completely swept me off of my feet by being everything I was looking for and more. So he's my first, my only, and my 'one'. I don't look to anyone else, knowing that what I do have is incredibly precious

heartsonacake Tue 26-May-20 17:24:26

Yep, I married my childhood sweetheart smile We’re in our 30s now, still happily married and neither of us with any regrets.

FLOrenze Tue 26-May-20 17:25:52

I married to please my Dad. I was 19 and my Dad was dying and he adored my partner. He said ‘he is the one, you just don’t know it yet’. We have been married 51 years.

Epigram Tue 26-May-20 17:29:31

I've had three relationships of three years or longer (including my marriage). I'm glad I ended up with DH as I adore him and think we are very well suited. I do have fond memories of both my other serious boyfriends, but I don't think I would have been as happy with them in the long term. I don't believe in the one or soulmates though.

edwinbear Tue 26-May-20 17:35:51

No, I didn’t. I married the safe, secure, reliable option. With a good job and similar values. We have a lovely home, 2 privately educated DC’s, he’s loyal, supports my career, does his fair share of childcare and a ‘good’ husband. But there’s no passion. I miss that.

ScrapThatThen Tue 26-May-20 17:39:20

Yes, he's great I feel so lucky we met and hope he still feels the same.

PrincessHoneysuckle Tue 26-May-20 17:43:53

Married Mr " Hes the first one to treat me right" in my 20s.Married the love of my life in my mid 30s

Flowersinthewild Tue 26-May-20 17:46:13

Been single many years now, im my 30’s and have no intention of finding anyone. Also don’t believe in the ‘one’.

Best friend believes that there is a ‘one’ for everyone and Is desperately searching for him as wants to settle and have kids. I pray for her that she does find it.

Nosurveysneeded Tue 26-May-20 17:50:06

I think that there are potentially more than one of 'the one'.

I married and lived with a good one for many years. I am now dating a good man.

Neither have felt like 'the one' but I have never been so in love that I lose myself and some people describe it.... and I odd?

Poppyismyfavourite Tue 26-May-20 17:50:23

@FLOrenze was your dad right?

randomchap Tue 26-May-20 17:53:33

Don't believe in "the one", neither did my late wife.

However we worked brilliantly together and were very happy.

JuneJuly Tue 26-May-20 18:44:40

Gosh, yes. I wouldn't want to be with anyone else. He has his faults, as do I, but he's the only man I've truly loved & he is a loving husband. Best sex too.

I would never have settled for anything less though, would rather be on my own.

FLOrenze Tue 26-May-20 19:12:38

@Poppyismyfavourite We have a good marriage. I worshipped my dad and he is like him in so many ways. We are both really independent and he worked away from home a lot throughout all our married life. I joke that we stayed married so long because we were apart so much. There is a lot of truth in the joke though. We haven’t always got on, but looking back, I think we were equally at fault.

His biggest quality is that he makes me feel safe. I had a wickedly awful mother and losing my Dad so young was very hard.

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