OK... Short story. Unfulfilling marriage, 13 years, 2 DC, primary age. Counselling, 5 to 10 years of niggling unhappiness, attraction to others (me) burying head in sand and shutting down emotionally (him) pouring all our time into beautiful, idyllic, family home (both) whilst ignoring the issues.
I pulled the plug. Feel relieved and guilty. In a drunken moment he thanked me and I think deep down knows its for the best.
However, he's not as far along as me in the process of accepting it.
We had agreed, keep the house, finish the DIY jobs. Lower interest rate going through this month, meaning I could afford the payments alone, in 2 years, reassess, sell if we have to. He'd agreed to rent. I do 90%of childcare and basically he's a 3rd child. We live rurally, he's always refused to learn to drive.. except now he will
Kids to be with me, he's to have all the time he'd like with them here, EOW and at least one night a week with him. He does work 12 hr days and is away for up to a week a month with work though. So it all made sense.
That was a month ago. Since, more ostrich behaviour, doing jobs on the house but asking stuff like, what colour will we decorate this, I'll decorate the bedroom etc... No looking at houses, no noises about moving...
So today I offered to go. I found a rental I can afford. He's agreed. I have said I've no idea how the childcare will work and he's likely to see them less due to location(not me stopping him, but just a fact ) but he's not bothered.
So.
Tell me, good stuff. Please! I'm excited but so so sad to leave, he would have been too..but to be fair, more my house than his, he was barely there.
But there's got to be positives right...
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
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AIBU?
To ask you to tell me good things about moving out of the marital home...
32 replies
Stegasaurusmum · 17/05/2020 23:29
OP posts:
Am I being unreasonable?
5 votes. Final results.
POLL
You are being unreasonable
20%
You are NOT being unreasonable
80%
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