To feel overwhelmed with weaning?(88 Posts)
DS is 6 months. I've just started weaning him. We give him 2 meals a day, one BLW and one mashed.
I'm so stressed by it. He is teething and doesn't like being put down. I dont feel I have the time to prepare food for him and clean up. Often he manages a few nins in his high chair then cries and ive gone to loads of effort.
I'm stressed about his iron levels. We think he might have a gluten or egg intolerance. I've found a gluten and egg free bread which he has enjoyed but I've just seen it's got honey in it. I've got the Annabel Karmel book in front of me and it says he should be on 3 meals a day - the planner includes has several components to each meal. How can I possibly prepare all of that?
He doesn't sleep well at night so I'm getting very little sleep.
I'm tired and teary and exhausted.
I've no advice but please be kind to yourself. You sound so stressed.
It does feel a bit overwhelming to start with. Baby doesn't have to be on 3 meals a day, start with one meal and work your way up. Meals can be just veg, boil some broccoli and give it to baby - instant meal. Also, pre made baby food exists for a reason so don't worry about using it when you have to. I don't know anyone who didn't give Ella's pouches. If you think baby has some kind of intolerance you must have that checked by a GP before barring any food groups. Finally, this thread will attract loads of people saying just BLW it's so easy and wonderful. Do it your own way, there's literally nothing wrong with purée and in fact the WHO recommends starting with puréed food. Good luck.
Your baby is still having milk right?
In which case they will be absolutely fine
My daughter barely ate anything at a year - I remember it was so stressful. Even at 18 months to two she still wasn’t bothered.
Personally I’d get rid of the Annabel Karmel and just give finger food. This age is for exploring and learning - they’re meant to be getting their nutrients from milk not food at this stage.
I don’t even eat three meals a day-that book sounds over the top
If I could go back in time I’d say to myself chill out and have zero expectations
I always hate weaning. I can never understand why people can’t wait to start. I started my DD at 6 months and by 7 months not one bite of food had passed her lips.
Honestly it gets easier though. Just hang in there and don’t worry, until they reach 1 their main source of nutrition is milk.
Are you bf or ff? Either way FOOD IS FOR FUN UNTIL THEY ARE ONE. Your new mantra. Screw Annabel, yor MIL and the lady down the road with the perfect eyebrows.
My now 3 yr old DS had zero interest until 8 months and wasn’t on 3 meals until about 8 months. Granted I didn’t push it but I also lost a lot of sleep, wasted a lot of time and food and berated myself for being utterly useless and unable to just give my child a bit of my tikka masala like everyone else seemed to be doing.
Just started weaning my DD and refuse to get worked up this time. Mash up whatever is handy every day and start when smooth stuff then add lumps. If he’s getting distressed and spitting everything out stop completely and try again in a week or so. Stressed mum equals stressed baby.
The number one aim is to make food fun and introduce lots of different flavours. There is nothing you can feed him that is as nutritionally balanced and calorie dense as breastmilk or formula for the first year.
The nhs have a good website for weaning the sure start one-it’s on IG and fb too.
I’ve not hit weaning yet as baby isn’t ready yet but I’ve got an Annabelle Karmel book and I’m sure it starts weaning at 4 months? So they would have built up to the 3 meals by the time their 6 months.
Can you give small amounts of what you have? If it’s not too salty etc. I’ve found there’s some people on Instagram that have good ideas for feeding babies. One is Paulaandjackeat the eldest son had a lot of allergies so she might be useful to follow and she’s weaning her 2nd now doing BLW. Joe Wicks has weanin15 which is also good for ideas.
Sorry for the long ramble
I remember being totally stressed about weaning (although for different reasons - tried BLW as it was really pushed but I had hideous anxiety about choking).
At 6 months, don't worry at all about him having 3 meals a day - he will still be getting most of what he needs from milk.
I second the pre-made baby food - there really is no harm in it and it will take away the stress of cooking stuff that then doesn't get eaten. Maybe get a couple of different jars and see what he takes to?
You will get into it eventually but please try not to stress and honestly just do what suits you - I wish I had done that sooner
Food is for fun before 1. As long as he has sufficient milk, a meal is not a meal in the actual sense. Share a bit of your toast at breakfast, try him with a bit of fruit or veg or cheese at lunch and a spoon or two of your evening meal if it is baby friendly. Try not to worry, the milk provides every thing he needs for now while he adapts to solids. And their tummies are tiny- a bit of carrot, mushed or not, is a meal. Just make extra and whack it in ice cube trays when you make a roast for example, if you are using purees.
*wasnt on 3 meals until 18 months that should read!
You're really overthinking it. I just chucked them a bit of what I was eating or something fast and simple if it wasn't suitable. You don't need to cook elaborate meals, it's fine for them to suck on a strip of toast.
Ella's pouches and simple foods non messy until at least age 1. You need to look into the allergy thing it's a big deal to think "I think he has a gluten and egg allergy" without any confirmation so sort that before properly starting to wean.
Mine is 11 months and is only just managing three meals a day, and as started weaning at 5 months. She just had no interest and took long enough to accept one meal. Please just relax about it all. If she is having milk fine then there is absolutely no rush.
If you haven’t already then discuss the possible allergies with your HV. You want to build up to 3 meals eventually but not straight away. Definitely don’t be afraid to resort to a pouch for at least one meal a day to give yourself a break. Bits of what you’re eating if it’s suitable as well. Porridge is good for breakfast as it’s quick and easy. A meal at that age can literally be a few cut up steamed veggies, or mashed if you’re spoon feeding. No need for complicated recipes.
Don't stress! If you are baby led weaning, just dish up some of whatever you are having. Just keep an eye on how much salt is in your food. Doesn't need to be on 3 meals a day either, at that age they are just exploring.
When we weaned our daughter she literally had exactly what we ate 3 times a day. Most ended up on the floor, but she had milk before every meal so was still getting nourishment and had a full stomach
Bin the book. Offer one meal a day until you get the hang of it. Bits of whatever you are eating. They don’t need their own special meals. If you have pasta and meatballs, you offer that. If you have a sandwich and crisps, you tear off a bit of your sandwich and offer some sliced pear or banana instead of crisps. You plan that one meal for a convenient time when you’re home. Don’t worry about carting food around with you to go out just yet. You’ll get the hang of it, but it’s all just playing and exploring now.
By one year old the recommendation is to offer three meals plus two snacks a day. At 6 months they are fine with one meal a day. My son hardly ate a thing for a few weeks but he did enjoy playing about with his food. Maybe you could take some stress out of it by just sitting him on your knee and letting him eat a few bits from your plate sometimes rather than all the faff of separate meals.
Just seconding what has already been said here.. “Food before one is just for fun” all his nutrients at this stage will still be coming from milk (whether bf or ff). At this stage it’s just about them having the opportunity to try different tastes and textures. And there’s nothing wrong with pre-made baby food; in fact the standards are really strict these days. Otherwise simple things like toast, fruit or veggies (puréed or not), mashed potatoes, porridge, are all good choices.
Out of interest, what makes you think he has the egg and gluten intolerance?
I agree that you have to keep thinking that food is just for fun, it’s not necessarily to eat, he’ll get all the nutrients he needs from milk. It’s to taste things, explore, see how food feels - it’s great that you’re doing some finger food. Are you usually anxious? Have you struggled more since having your DS? I am an anxious person and got much worse after having my DD, I had medication and counselling when she was 6 months which helped me a lot.
I found each Stage overwhelming. Pregnancy, labour, birth, breastfeeding, potty training, you name it, i was rubbish at it. Felt isolated and overwhelmed.
They are teen and preteen now, and thriving and delightful. Ot does come to an end Op, I know it feels really overwhelming now but remember, its all a phase, and Itchanges all the time.
give yourself some space to breathe and buy some Ellas kitchen pouches and don’t panic.
If you get a chance one evening make a pan of veg, ( including spinach if you’re worried about iron)and a pan of boiled potato. Mash/ blitz them and freeze them in ice cube trays. You will feel beyond efficient.
Ooh and scraped banana, unzip one side of a banana and run a teaspoon up it, it liquifies beautiful. My kids livedon this.
Oh And throw the book out, it just makes it all too complicated.
all the best to you op
YANBU. I found the same with prepping and clearing up - it took forever. There have been times I’ve felt like it’s all I’ve done all day. Get a vitamin supplement so that’s one less thing to worry about. You can only do your best. A baby with a stressed out mummy is less likely to eat anyway.
It's hard not to convince yourself you're doing everything wrong, but you aren't I promise! Try to relax a bit Baby will still be getting most of its nutrition from milk, so solids are more like a bonus at the moment. Don't make food a battle! If they eat something, great! If not, don't stress and try again tomorrow. You're doing great!
I found batch cooking when DD was napping helped me a lot, so when a meal came around I just took something out of the freezer and microwaved it. I used this book and Dd liked quite a few things in it at each stage www.amazon.co.uk/Baby-Child-Vegetarian-Recipes-Delicious/dp/0091853001?tag=mumsnetforu03-21
I used Ellas’s pouches when out.
And sometime she just had porridge for a meal (still does, 9 years on).
Ignore Annabel Karmel.
When you eat, give your baby something to eat (or play with, squish or ignore).
-low salt Heinz beans
-pasta with a bit of cheese
Don't worry about it being a complete meal, it just needs to be some food to expand their palate and get them used to textures, chewing, etc.
Why do you suspect an intolerance?
DD is 7 months. She has 3 meals a day and most of the time has a starter of finger food for BLW. Try and work on this as she started sleeping through when she was eating more. She has a dessert at lunch and dinner and a beaker of water (plus 4 bottles a day). She eats as much or as little as she likes and I often use pouches to get some more variety plus I batch cook bits and freeze them or use bits of our leftovers.
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