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AIBU?

To want to report this nursery?

70 replies

Janeych · 14/09/2018 12:43

Witnessed some absolutely shocking behaviour today from staff of a nursery school on a group outing with the children. I’m a mum of 2 little ones and what I saw brought a tear to my eye, just imagining if they were my children being treated like that and I’d never have a clue. No idea of how to go about reporting this or what to do, but feel I must do something, any advice anyone? Thank you x

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LaurieMarlow · 14/09/2018 12:44

What were they doing? Hard to say if YABU or not without specifics?

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HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 14/09/2018 12:48

Well it would depend on what they were doing surely? Its not unreasonable to report if you feel it necessary but it would be pretty tricky if you did not know which Nursery they were from. If you do know, I would imagine your first port of call should be to contact the manager.

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Janeych · 14/09/2018 12:51

There children were all miserable and were being pulled along on wrist reins so not a nice general vibe but what bothered me most were the following:
Little girl didn’t want to leave the playground, aged about 2, one staff member said to the other ‘God, when is she 30 months?’ And other responded ‘I don’t want her’ really nastily.
Little boy about 3 asked to go for a wee, one staff member said to the other ‘oh he’s done this before and didn’t do a wee, let’s not bother’
Another little girl didn’t want to go back on the reins, staff member to her ‘well you’re never coming out with us again (name)’
It doesn’t seem so awful written down but the atmosphere was horrible with the staff only interacting with each other and barely the children. Maybe this is normal but I hope not!

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PermanentlyFrizzyHairBall · 14/09/2018 12:53

I think you should report this to the nursery. Those poor kids are spending the majority of their waking hours with people who treat them as annoying inconveniences. Must be horrible. Do you know the name of the nursery?

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ZanyMobster · 14/09/2018 12:56

Reins totally fine and if that is their policy then should be enforced rather than the child deciding they don't fancy using them. Not sure about the rest, you have heard a snippet of a conversation and out of context.

I don't think there is anything there for you to report to anyone official but if you are genuinely concerned then you could contact the nursery manager.

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Immigrantsong · 14/09/2018 12:56

Ring Ofsted and tell them everything you said right here. I would also ring the nursery and tell them you have reported them too. The management needs to know their staff is neglecting and abusing kiddies. This isn't nice at all and you have a responsibility to vocalise it.

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Janeych · 14/09/2018 12:56

Yes I do. So nursery manager best course of action do you think? Poor babies :-(

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ZanyMobster · 14/09/2018 12:57

I do agree with permanently but I still think there is not a huge amount to go on hence why report to nursery manager rather than Ofsted.

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ZanyMobster · 14/09/2018 12:59

I don't really think there is anything to report to Ofsted here. Have I misread, where is the abuse? Neglect possibly if not taking to the toilet but you really don't know the full situation here.

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Janeych · 14/09/2018 12:59

I’ve googled the nursery, I just feel as a parent I’d be devastated if my little one was treated like this by someone I’d trusted with their care.

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Hidillyho · 14/09/2018 13:00

I think you would report to Ofsted

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AamdC · 14/09/2018 13:01

Do you know what Nursery it is? Speak to the manageer im guessing they wouldnt be wanting the attitude of their staff members to reflect badly wirh the general public! But regarding wrist straps its a safety measure better to have children on reins than under a car

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LaurieMarlow · 14/09/2018 13:01

Yes, report to nursery manager. Hard to tell how serious it is (may be just rogue members of staff) based on snippets.

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MessyBun247 · 14/09/2018 13:03

Report to manager and see what response you get.
I’d also be tempted to call social services and ask for advice. Just tell them exactly what you saw/heard.

Staff being so cold towards the children is horrible and if they are doing that in public, what are they doing behind the nursery doors where no one can see.

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Littlefish · 14/09/2018 13:04

I would phone the nursery manager and discuss it with them. If your discussion makes you feel that you are happy that they are going to act on what you've said, then leave it with them. I would hope that they would re-assure you that they will be taking your concerns seriously and discussing it with the staff members at the earliest possible opportunity.

If, at the end of the conversation, you are still left with concerns, then contact Ofsted.

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Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:05

Yes I get it re the wrist straps, I think it was more how utterly miserable all the children seemed! I’m not saying the little girl shouldn’t have put the reins back on, at all, safety first, but the nastiness is saying she would never come out again?! Totally unnecessary. None of these children were older than 3/3.5

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louise5754 · 14/09/2018 13:05

I would speak to the manager too

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Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:06

I think you are right, thank you

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Creeper8 · 14/09/2018 13:06

please do report. thats awful.

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Immigrantsong · 14/09/2018 13:07

As an educator, if staff are that brazen in public and neglect the kids and are vocal and mean enough for people to hear and take notice, I would have serious concerns for abuse and safeguarding issues (as who knows how they act when completely alone with the kids). The neglectful behaviour is enough to warrant a call to Ofsted. Managers can be good and take action or bad enough to let this be forgotten and not dealt with. Please ring Ofsted too.

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Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:08

Exactly! Without revealing too much detail, the nursery shares a premises with the public area they were in, so they weren’t totally out in public if you get me?! You can pay to access this specific area and they obviously use it daily (which is lovely in theory but not in this case!!)

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Awwlookatmybabyspider · 14/09/2018 13:08

Well put it this way if it were my child/grandchild or nibling. I'd want someone to report it.

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Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:09

I was with husband and kids and my husband heard it too and was equally shocked

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RahRahRooRah · 14/09/2018 13:09

Report it to the nursery manager

Then go back to the same place at the same time next - as they will probably have a schedule they stick to - and see if they are showing the same behaviour to the children

Film it if you can, it would at least show the body language towards the children even if you can't hear their words

I agree with other posts, these uncaring people may be the children's main carers, and that's just awful

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Nesssie · 14/09/2018 13:09

And other responded ‘I don’t want her’ really nastily. - Nobody else has been snippy about a customer? In the heat of the moment?

he’s done this before and didn’t do a wee, let’s not bother’- the child might be known for saying this, and not needing to go, thus wasting time?

well you’re never coming out with us again (name)’ - No parent has ever said 'if you don't behave we won't go'?

Honestly none of this seems that bad, and you only saw a brief moment.