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AIBU?

To think that some behaviours should be grown out of?

56 replies

6079SmithW · 14/02/2018 23:58

I'm fully prepared to get flamed but I genuinely wonder if I'm the only person who thinks this?

I was talking today to a friend who was at a wedding which was ruined by a couple of (adult) men getting drunk like adolescents.

It made me think of behaviours (from men and women) that perhaps should be grown out of:
Drinking irresponsibly?
Collecting soft toys?
Obsessive gaming?
Football stickers or footballers' autographs?
Fawning over pop stars?

So are there others you would add to the list or AIBU?

OP posts:

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BadLad · 15/02/2018 00:12

Trying to stop people having their own harmless fun.

To think that some behaviours should be grown out of?

blaaake · 15/02/2018 00:13

I wouldn't say getting wankered and ruining someone's wedding is harmless fun BadLad

OutyMcOutface · 15/02/2018 00:14

YANBU and:
Calling people boring for not also being lowbrow drunkards.

partystress · 15/02/2018 00:15

All of yours, plus:
whispering secrets to someone when other people are in the room,
going gaga over anything Disney,
quizzing you interminably about how much you loved the present they just gave you.

BettyBooJustDoinTheDoo · 15/02/2018 00:16

Adult thumb sucking

WhineandDine1 · 15/02/2018 00:17

Adults who can't control their drinking drive me insane. There's a huge difference between getting drunk and having harmless fun and getting totally off your face and starting problems. While at uni I worked in a pub that had a function room often hired out for wedding parties/christenings. It was crazy how many fights would break out and perhaps I grew up very naive but it really shocked me. I really think it's incredibly pathetic.

Also think obsessively fangirling is a bit tedious but harmless.

BadLad · 15/02/2018 00:18

That's only one thing on the list. The rest of them are things that don't actually harm anybody, but the OP has decided that because she doesn't think they should be done, nobody else should. And she doesn't actually want to discuss them, she wants more added to the list.

WhineandDine1 · 15/02/2018 00:19

Also adults who act like teenagers about relationships and the needy types who can't be single for a second constantly looking for male attention. I get going through that "phase"'as a teenager but i think it's quite sad in grown women.

WorraLiberty · 15/02/2018 00:23

Ruining someone's wedding is completely unacceptable and quite different to the other things in your list.

As long as the other things don't affect anyone else negatively, what on earth is wrong with them?

LegallyBrunet · 15/02/2018 00:23

I don't think you're being unreasonable about the excessive drinking at weddings, you are about everything else. I have a collection of Disney ornaments and soft toys. Who am I harming with that? Nobody. Life's short, as long as they're not hurting anyone and it's not illegal, let people do what makes them happy.

MrMeSeeks · 15/02/2018 00:26

Ruining a wedding and getting drunk all the time absolutely, but the rest why not?
It's always on here that if a man likes to game it's immature and i think it's ridiculous.
I also have no idea why its not ok for men to like pop stars.
Not my cup of tea, but i have my favourite bands!

WorraLiberty · 15/02/2018 00:26

Come to think of it, at the age of 48 I should probably have grown out of the desire to slide down the stairs on a mattress.

Yet I did exactly that this afternoon when my DH was taking DS3's old mattress to the dump

I can't tell you how good it felt. We all ended up having a few goes and timing ourselves

BadLad · 15/02/2018 00:30

48 I should probably have grown out of the desire to slide down the stairs on a mattress

Totally irresponsible.

What happens if you break your legs, and can't go to work, and you're the only wage-earner?

What happens if your DS sees you, and tries to copy you by taking a mattress to a ski jump and sliding down that on it?

Come to think of it, couldn't you have donated the mattress to a charity shop?

Someone will find a way to tell you off.

WorraLiberty · 15/02/2018 00:34

It's ok BadLad I took myself outside and gave myself a suitable kicking, despite my broken legs.

DS is on his way to the Winter Olympics as I type.

StaplesCorner · 15/02/2018 00:41

Yes getting wankered and ruining it for other people, definitely stupid. I like the one about whispering secrets too - that's surely pretty childish, happens in my office all the time

N0tfinished · 15/02/2018 00:51

That schoolgirl clique behavior. I wish people grew out of that.
I agree of the childish pastimes like toys & cartoon memorabilia. I don't get that at all.

I'd add people whose tastes have never developed. Still drink vodka & Red Bull and obsess over their teen bands etc etc

Domino20 · 15/02/2018 00:55

Smoking marijuana is not a great look for a grown up. Most people are ridiculous arses when stoned. Just grow up already!

ReanimatedSGB · 15/02/2018 01:07

Being an aggressive, annoying drunk is bad behaviour however old you are. Things that do no one else any harm, though - do whatever you want. Too many boring people whose only excitement is trying to police other people's lives as it is.

DreamyMcDreamy · 15/02/2018 01:15

It made me think of behaviours (from men and women) that perhaps should be grown out of:
Drinking irresponsibly?
Collecting soft toys?
Obsessive gaming?
Football stickers or footballers' autographs?
Fawning over pop stars?

Ok,so when you're an adult you're not allowed to -

drink more than a couple of drinks and stay in control the whole time and remain dignified.
Collecting soft toys is for babies,you're grown up now, you should have ditched that long ago and only collect grown up things. Like bottles of vintage wine? Oh no,wait, hang on,you have a problem with adults liking to drink alcohol.
Fawning over pop stars? My 13 year old self would still scream if Jason Donovan appeared in front of me and said hello.

People are individuals, who cares what they like.We're all different. Would be boring if we were all the same.
(Oh, and who defines what is grown up and proper to like?! Balls to that. I'll like what I like!

DreamyMcDreamy · 15/02/2018 01:20

going gaga over anything Disney

Why? That's what you like, surely? Why is there a suitable cut off age and it's only kids that like it?
I'm not a massive Disney fan to the extent that I'm obsessed, although I do like the odd Disney film.
I do obsess over certain sci fi programmes though, does that mean I should give over as I'm old enough to know better?!
Each to their own!

laudanum · 15/02/2018 01:36

🙄

halfwitpicker · 15/02/2018 01:39

God this is the thread for me I love a good moan.

If I ruled the world everyone would be sober, polite, on time and courteous. Invisible probably too.

I need to move to Switzerland really.

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lowcarbcath · 15/02/2018 02:37

My alcoholic FIL thinks it's normal to fall over backwards when drunk and end up in hospital for the best part of a week. He's nearly 70.

Basecamp21 · 15/02/2018 05:54

I think that being grown up should mean you get a sense of priorities and perspective - mature consenting adults should be free to do whatever they like as long as it is not harming anyone else......and I mean harming not merely irritating them.

And that includes whingeing and moaning about what others do - that's an irritating habit but stopping people from doing it would be wrong.

I worked in a football clubs venue and saw many drunk people at weddings and plenty of fights....few 'ruined' a wedding - might have been mildly annoying to some people for 1/2 hour or so but only a drama queen would claim it ruined the whole day for everyone - most people at the weddings would barely of noticed.

Obviously there were exceptions like the one where the groom got stabbed but 99% of drunken behaviour lies in the irritating but harmless bracket.

6079SmithW · 15/02/2018 09:17

The rest of them are things that don't actually harm anybody, but the OP has decided that because she doesn't think they should be done, nobody else should. And she doesn't actually want to discuss them, she wants more added to the list.

@BadLad I'm sorry if I didn't make myself clear - I really do want to discuss these (and other) behaviours, and whether there are things we should grow out of or not? I'm genuinely interested.

I get that none of these behaviours hurt anyone (apart from the wedding thing), but I just find it strange. I wasn't sure if I was in the majority of 'grown ups' or if I was just boring like you have suggested.

@DreamyMcDreamy re fawning over pop stars - I understand (though not about Jason Donovan - eurgh). However think there is a huge difference between going wobbly kneed over meeting someone you liked as a child or for example as an adult following a pop star on social media and sending messages about how much you 'love' them?

@WorraLiberty Sliding down the stairs on a mattress sounds like great fun and would definitely not make it on to my list!We all do silly/crazy/wild things from time to time. It's good fun. Isn't there a difference though between an occasional fun activity and persistent childlike behaviour?

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