To disagree with friend leaving 2 under 4 in bath ...

[SofieMonde]

while she is downstairs. She thinks it's ok "because I can hear them"

[limon]

Yanbu. S/he is being completely unreasonale.

[AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered]

YANBU! You can't hear drowning.

[Shoxfordian]

She's obviously wrong

[Valkyrie99]

YANBU. No it's not ok. Drowning is silent and they can drown in a bathtub.

[SomeRandomBird]

YANBU fine to nip out and get towels, not leave them on a different floor.

[SofieMonde]

I have told her this but it falls on deaf ears. What should I do next as I worry for the kids?

[LovingLola]

She is very stupid. Is this regularly happening?

[MadRainbow]

I don't leave my 4 year old in the bath for more than a min at a time and I'm in a flat...

[Shoxfordian]

What is she like as a parent apart from this?

[MadRainbow]

Just read your last post - I don't think, unless there are any other safeguarding issues, there is anything you can do :( hopefully someone else may have a better idea

[GummyGoddess]

Mention to a health visitor? She's being stupid and her feelings are not more valid than the lives of her children.

[MamaDuckling]

Awful thing to have to search for but could you find anything to forward her, accounts of the unthinkable? Might make her think twice.

[KarmaStar]

Suggest if she's going to leave them that she buys them a support each which prevents the child sinking below the water,sort of like a rubber ring but fixed further up the body.But you should continue to voice your concerns.If she continues to ignore you then you may have to consider speaking to someone else.
She is being ridiculously stupid and risking her children's lives.
Less than a couple of minutes stand between dead children and a manslaughter charge.

[Hotdoggity]

God no. I think I prevent about ten accidents every single bathtime!

[Oblomov18]

Recommendations are :

"Never leave your child alone in the tub until they are 5, and then only leave them briefly until they are at least 7. "

[SofieMonde]

Not a new thing has been doing it since the first one was little. She is very emotionally distant as a mother. Doesn't seem to enjoy spending time with them and also leaves them watching telly while she naps upstairs.
Who else can I talk to about this?

[MincemeatTart]

A very silly thing to do. Not only drowning but head injury risk.

[Shoxfordian]

Social services if you're really worried

[SofieMonde]

What will social services do ? Have a chat

[MadRainbow]

The emotional distance is worrying including the other issues you've mentioned. I know of a lady recently that has had her child removed due to an escalation of this. She started out lazy and became neglectful over time; we aren't sure why exactly but again she doesn't believe she has done anything wrong.

I do know the SS are far less likely to take notice of a "unrelated party" than they are of a family member (my brother is going through all of this atm) can you involve the child's father or a grandparent at all?

[upsideup]

How long is she leaving them for? I left DS4 in the bath upstairs today to go down stairs to open the door to dd, was gone less than a minute. Theres a big difference between leaving a todler for 1 minute or 20 minutes.

[upsideup]

Who is washing them? They can't be getting themselves in and out of the bath alone at under 4

[SofieMonde]

About 10-15mins

[Giraffey1]

Are there on official leaflets etc you give her so she can see it’s not just you saying it’s the wrong thing to do? I’m not a parent but the thought of what she is doing horrifies me!

[GummyGoddess]

If she's distant then she probably doesn't care that much surely? Is she on her own, or is there the possibility of depression?

Either way, you can mention to the health visitor if a social services report intimidates you. If needed they can escalate it to social services. A friend of mine reported to the health visitor someone she knows, and was reassured that they said they'd go and check up gently to see what was happening on the person.