AWBU if we have sex tonight

[humpbackwhale]

Husband has a sperm analysis on Monday. Leaflet says "try not to have any sexual activity 3 days before your appointment". We're horny. WWYD?

[DJBaggySmallpox]

Dont do it, it will mess up the results

[MissConductUS]

Have him take care of you however you like. He's going to have to wait or the test will come in too low.

[justdontevenfuckingstart]

Well if you're having a sperm analysis on Monday it must be for a pretty important reason, so maybe follow the advice.

[Sparklingbrook]

The leaflet seems pretty clear to me.

[Isadora2007]

Control yourselves surely?

[humpbackwhale]

boooooo drunk me is trying to find a loophole

[Newtothis2017]

Which is more important?

[abigamarone]

So horny that you're on mumsnet?

[khajiit13]

Eh? Go to sleep.

[MissConductUS]

Tell him to take one for the team and get busy, if you know what I mean.

[Justanothernap]

Well you don't have sperm to analyse so you're ok. Your partner might have to take one for the team though so to speak. How's that for a loop hole?

[FeelingAggrieved]

What loophole are you hoping to find?

[justdontevenfuckingstart]

Have a cuddle without the sharing stories that you aren't going to get.

[Isadora2007]

If it helps any I just had several on your behalf... 😉

[GrimDamnFanjo]

seriously ?

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

It Makes not one iota of difference to me whether you shag tonight or not.. Your sex life is the least of my worries.
I still have to pay my mortgage.
However you know the advice you've been given, but you're a big girl and he's a boy, so its your choice

[JemimaLovesHamble]

As long as this isn't being done on the NHS, go for it. But if it is, you'd either have to tell them that you couldn't resist fiddling with each other and can you please have another try on us, or just accept that your test results may be worthless but pretend they are accurate. Is it worth it?

[nevereverever83]

the loophole you're looking for is called cunnilingus

[nocoolnamesleft]

It doesn't matter which loophole he ejaculates into, it'll bugger up the test results.

[BaconAndBees]

FFS.

[BertieBotts]

He can't wank either. No. Stay chaste

And don't let him sort you out either. DH tried that, he thought it was a brilliant trick. No. Blue balls are real and he spent much of the next day whimpering in a cold bath.

[SashaFiercesMum]

Nevereverever

[OkPedro]

Blue balls are not a "thing"
no one has ever died because they couldn't or didn't have sex for a few days.