Stranger asked if I'm 'practising' for children

[LG93]

Was at a BBQ for my friends birthday at the weekend. I was talking to a friend of hers who I'd not met before. Her uncle came over and joined in. Was asking if I was married, I said yes. Asked if I had children. I said no. (We're currently ttc so I don't like this question anyway but that's likely as it's a sensitive topic currently) then he asked if we were practicing conceiving?! I just sort of stared at him until he changed the subject (to the other lady: 'well you must have kids already' - she didn't.)

He seemed a nice guy other than that but aibu to think it's weird to ask a stranger (who is young enough to be your daughter) about her sex life?!

[LilyWhites325]

What in all seriousness that's really creepy though ...

[Letstryagainshallwe]

Does seem very odd but people are weird. I hate being asked if I'm gonna have any more. Just find some questions abit intrusive.

[AhveHeardIt]

Ew what a creep.

[EdmundCleverClogs]

Was his name Uncle Geoffrey?

What a creep though. I'd have said 'no need to practice, think we have it down. How about you? Still managing to get it up, or is it now all Viagra? At your age I'd imagine all that gets you up at night is a full bladder...'

[SweetChickadee]

eeewww - what a sleazeball

[isthismummy]

Both rude and insensitive. Made even worse when it's about a difficult subject.

Good luck with ttc. It's a stressful time and I wish you all the best

[HateSummer]

Sick. .

Some people have no boundaries. I remember once meeting my dd's nursery friend and her dad at the park for a play and him asking me if I breastfed and then telling me in detail about how his wife's breast milk really suited his dds and his dd1 had strong bones because of it. Then I was told I made a good choice and whether I planned to breastfeed my next child (I was pregnant). Suffice to say I never met him alone again and tried to organise things through the wife. Odd ball.

[LoyaltyAndLobster]

Very weird indeed.

[BertieBotts]

DH broke his foot recently and we were at the hospital getting a second opinion on whether he needed an operation (no).

Doctor asked how he did it and DH explained he was playing with DS at the playground and fell jumped off a climbing frame. I can't remember exactly the comment now but he asked how many we had, we said one, and he made some comment along the lines of "Better hurry up and have number two then!"

He didn't know that we've been trying for 15 months and had two miscarriages, but I still thought it was stunningly insensitive!

[missiondecision]

Weirdo !

[VeryCunningStunt]

'No need for any practice here. I fair love fucking, I do!'

That should shut down any further enquiries!

[Nomoreboomandbust]

I think I would have laughed.

Like Edmunds reply though

[Nomoreboomandbust]

HateSummer Jesus Christ

[Migraleve]

Did he say practising for children as in your title

Or

Practising conceiving as in your OP

Because the 2 are very different. People often say oh are you practising? When you do something 'motherly' and certainly don't mean sex

[diddl]

So he basically asked if you have unprotected sex?

That is very odd!

[LG93]

Wishing I'd had the wit to come up with some of these responses but I was just sort of stunned.

@Migraleve he meant sex.

[HammerToFall]

I like Hendricks with cucumber mint and elderflower presse instead of tonic, in a massive gin glass. It's lovely.

[JWrecks]

@VeryCunningStunt HA! That comment combined with your username drew a good belly laugh out of me!

[PyongyangKipperbang]

I wouldnt have been offended by that Bertie and I speak as someone who is in double digits for miscarriages.

I suspect he was making a joke about you having #2 quickly before your husband breaks his own neck farting about on climbing frames.

[TsarinaPeggy]

Ugh. I worked with a nosy woman like this. I'd had a miscarriage which she knew about but kept asking (with alarming frequency) if me and DH were actively 'trying for a baby'.

I'd had enough one day and said "are you really asking me if my husband is ejaculating in my vagina without the use of contraception?" She didn't ask after that but it didn't stop her offering me bullshit fertility dolls.

[EdmundCleverClogs]

PyongyangKipperbang, your reply to Bertie is rather rude. If she found it insensitive, she had a perfect reason to feel that way. As for 'breaks his neck farting around on climbing frames', for goodness sake if it was that simple to do so, the bloody things wouldn't exist.

I'm sorry for your losses, however that doesn't give you the right to put down another poster's obvious and completely reasonable upset at insensitive/foot-in-mouth comments. Her story, along with the OP only serve to highlight exactly why no-one should question a couples' attempts at having children unless they specifically bring it up themselves.

[BertieBotts]

I didn't find it rude, don't worry.

[MargoChanning]

A male friend of a friend, who I met for the first time, asked if I was planning on having more children. When I said 'ones quite enough' with a smile (trying to deflect him as I've actually been through IVF and unlikely to be able to have more) he replied, 'so you've shut up shop then?'

Unbelievable prick.

[Pigface1]

Extremely rude and insensitive. His comment to the other lady was also extremely rude and insensitive, so at least you weren't alone!