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AIBU?

How to get referred to be sterilised

41 replies

lifesjoys · 27/05/2017 09:12

Posting for traffic.

You are more than welcome to read my other threads.

I've not got post natal depression
I'm not post baby hormonal
This isn't a spontaneous decision

How do I go about getting sterilised??

I don't want anymore kids, not now & not in 10 years time.

I'm not maternal, I never really wanted kids & I certainly wouldn't want to do it alone again.

So mind made up, no more kids

How can I persuade my doctor to refer me??

OP posts:

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SendintheArdwolves · 27/05/2017 09:16

So I take it you have already asked your doctor and he/she has refused?

FuckingDingDong · 27/05/2017 09:17

Threaten the doctor that if you have any more kids the doctor refusing to refer you will be paying the cost of bringing them up.

MissBax · 27/05/2017 09:20

Your gp? Why would you have to persuade them? Have they rejected a referral previously?

TheRealLemonLyman · 27/05/2017 09:20

I spoke to my dr and stated that I had considered all the options. Birth control did not suit me, I had no desire to have more children and so wanted to be sterilised. I was directed to my consultant (as was pregnant at the time) she asked me a few questions and then agreed to sterilise me during my c-section. It was relatively simple.

SheGotOffThePlane · 27/05/2017 09:20

Have you asked the GP already?
I purposely asked to see the straightforward, no nonsense, ex army GP at my practise and she referred me straight away

I'd ask to see a different doctor.

lifesjoys · 27/05/2017 09:22

I can't even get my doctor to refer me to have my fanjo corrected after a horrendous birth, let alone refer me to be sterilised.

Apparently "time" will make everything better in her books

OP posts:

lifesjoys · 27/05/2017 09:24

I discussed sterilisation & she laughed, she honestly thought I was joking.

I can't take hormones, they make me suicidal.

Because of the above I now have a DS & also because I am fucking stupid!

OP posts:

MissBax · 27/05/2017 09:26

Are you with a regular partner? Would he consider the snip? It's a much less invasive procedure, but obviously he may not be on board

chantico · 27/05/2017 09:27

Go to a different GP

Yours sounds dreadful, and I'd be considering if you were in formal complaint territory

MuvaWifey77 · 27/05/2017 09:27

If she's not taking you seriously then maybe look for a private clinic? you should be entitled to have full control of your body, life and decide this and have it for free, in case that fails I would see if maybe private clinic is an option. Good luck

lifesjoys · 27/05/2017 09:29

I've not got a partner & not had one for 7 months.

If I ever meet someone, I intend on meeting one who doesn't want kids or doesn't want anymore kids.

Il have a look at the potential cost

OP posts:

MissBax · 27/05/2017 09:31

I would definitely try GP again and just ask to see someone else :)

lifesjoys · 27/05/2017 09:32

What about a private doctor who could recommend my doctor refer me on the NHS??

I've already added to the population by 1 due to stupidity, I don't want to add anymore & put further strain on the country/NHS

OP posts:

SendintheArdwolves · 27/05/2017 09:33

I totally agree with you that sterilisation is your choice and that being dismissed as hormonal/irrational/you'll regret it later is both patronising and inaccurate. I have considered sterilisation in the past and similarly found it difficult to get taken seriously because of my age and the fact I have no kids.

BUT

You are just recovering from a traumatic birth, and you sound very conflicted about your new status as parent. You need to sort that out before getting sterilised, or doctors will keep fobbing you off.

Is there a pressing need to be sterilised RIGHT NOW? could you look into longterm reliable contraception for the next year (copper coil, implant etc) and then reapproach your GP when they can no longer claim that you aren't a suitable candidate?

BikeRunSki · 27/05/2017 09:37

Mine said he'd refer me if I wanted on the bafus of having had 2 hyperemisis pregnancies, both ending in emcs, one of which was a crash. DH had the snip instead though, much simpler.

Do you have a history of problematic pg or birth which could be used to add weight to your need/want for sterilisation?

maplesyruppancakes · 27/05/2017 09:38

I doubt they would refer you now if you don't even have a partner. Given the circumstances you describe I think you would have to go privately.

capricorn12 · 27/05/2017 09:39

If you find out let me know OP.
My GP won't refer me for it either as' it would be so much easier to get him done'. The fact that he flatly refuses to 'get done' doesn't alter her opinion and at 43 they will no longer prescribe me the pill which only really leaves me the coil as an option....... and I really don't fancy the coil after hearing other peoples horror stories.
I got the distinct impression that the cost was the problem.

RainbowsAndUnicorn · 27/05/2017 10:18

You can self refer and have it done privately, just like with any other procedure. Private care is usually very quick.

lifesjoys · 27/05/2017 11:23

It's £2500, I can't afford that & probably won't be able to for a long time.

I don't have a partner, however I am seeing someone (it's just not sexual yet).

I could go on contraception however it's likely my son would be left without a mother.

I could use the coil however, I don't want horrendous and painful periods.

Personally I'd like everything removed, no periods, no womb, no ovaries, no Fallopian tubes. Take it all, it's not needed.

OP posts:

MissBax · 27/05/2017 11:28

Condoms?

RainbowsAndUnicorn · 27/05/2017 11:31

Then it's condoms or no sex. No sex would be a very simple free solution.

If i wanted it done that badly, then I'd take a second job or do as much overtime as possible to afford it.

April241 · 27/05/2017 11:45

Condoms?

As a side note I've previously been on a few different types of pill and had the implant several times. I now have the mirena coil and it's the only contraception that hasn't given me any side effects.

Apparently it's due to the hormone being released directly where it should be rather than traveling round your blood stream so side effects are minimised. As a plus my periods are very minimal, only really spotting on and off for 5-7 days and I no longer have cramping. I've heard tons of horror stories about the coil but just putting another perspective on it.

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April241 · 27/05/2017 11:55

Also agree with seeing a different GP though as yours doesn't sound very supportive

MuvaWifey77 · 27/05/2017 13:11

I just asked DH about it , just to see his opinion on the subject as it's something I would consider as about to have my second one. His response was ridiculous and somewhat annoying he said "you can't do that , it would take away your womanhood and change your body" I wonder if he knows what those fucking pills donto my body and mind.. how stupid and insensitive of him.
Seek a different doctor OP, you will find the right one. Good luck .

expatinscotland · 27/05/2017 13:30

capricorn, go to an FPC or find another GP. She's bullying you into the coil. NOT ON. Unless you're a smoker, have a high BMI or other condition that means you cannot use the pill, you can until menopause, particularly the mini-pill.

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