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Neighbour - issue with gardener

(49 Posts)
Mrbluethecatt Thu 13-Apr-17 15:57:21

I have a large front and back garden which has grass, mature trees and flowers beds. I have rods in my back so i can't bend over and kneeling down is too difficult so i have a gardener (they are a team of two but only one comes at a time) who comes for a day once a month to cut grass, trim trees, weed etc.

He does a great job and is very reasonable price for what is done.

My neighbour has asked about my gardener in the past and came over today when he was here to ask about getting some work done. I was outside at the time so i hear him ask if the Gardner could come look at his garden. My gardener said he would at lunch about 1pm. My neighbour then went home. He then popped back in at least 3 other times that i saw before lunch.

After lunch my gardener was still working and my neighbour came back spoke to him and went away. Again i have noticed he has been back at least 4 times in total since lunch.

After the last time i spoke to my gardener who was getting fed up and has said he had to tell neighbour to stop coming over as he wasn't able to get on with his work.

My neighbour has just popped round again but this time i intercepted him to find out what he wanted. Neighbour wants his grass cut today. So he is coming over to see if the gardener is finished even though he was told he would have to book an appointment after Easter. As the gardener was finishing up today until Tuesday. I told my neighbour that he needed to get on and was working in my garden until at least 5 pm.

Neighbour has today me i am selfish and inconsiderate as neighbour is in his words old and infirm. Neighbour is not old (about 60) and runs marathons. Neighbour asked me to let the gardener do his grass instead of finishing up my garden. I said no i couldn't. I then made an excuse and came inside.

Now I'm feeling a bit guilty. Aibu to have said no? I don't like the idea of telling my gardener to do stuff we hadn't already agreed him to do but now i feel like a bitch.sad


Chirrup5 Thu 13-Apr-17 16:00:56

Of course YANBU your neighbour sounds like a prize tool.

KinkyAfro Thu 13-Apr-17 16:01:58


MrsELM21 Thu 13-Apr-17 16:03:26

YANBU, Your neighbour sounds weird

UppityHumpty Thu 13-Apr-17 16:03:31

Yanbu he's an idiot. The gardener should have just said no tbh

gleam Thu 13-Apr-17 16:03:59

Old at 60! What is he on?!

Nanny0gg Thu 13-Apr-17 16:04:28

I assume your gardener is self-employed?

It's up to him what jobs he does and he's agreed his hours with you already.

Your neighbour can find another one if he's desperate.

HecateAntaia Thu 13-Apr-17 16:07:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnUtterIdiot Thu 13-Apr-17 16:08:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AlternativeTentacle Thu 13-Apr-17 16:10:02

So you hire someone and he wants him to do his garden in the time you have hired him?


StillStayingClassySanDiego Thu 13-Apr-17 16:11:49

Don't feel guilty. Your neighbour is a knob and you are rightly standing up for yourself and the Gardener.

aginghippy Thu 13-Apr-17 16:20:17

YANBU The neighbour is a twat for hassling the gardener and for calling you names.

The gardener is being more than reasonable to tell him to book an appointment after Easter, rather than just telling him to fuck off.

ScrambledSmegs Thu 13-Apr-17 16:22:49

No of course YANBU. Your neighbour is a piss-taker.

Stormtreader Thu 13-Apr-17 16:24:33

I dont think I'd have been able to resist "Neighbour, you run marathons! I'm sure youre more than up to mowing your lawn!"

ScrommidgeClaryAndSpunt Thu 13-Apr-17 16:26:19

YANBU, OP. Your neighbour sounds like a prize chancer.

liz70 Thu 13-Apr-17 16:30:33

Tell your neighbour my dad is 75 with COPD and heart problems, and he still manages to mow the lawn when he feels up to it. If not, my 70 year old 4 feet 11 mum does it. So what's his bloody excuse. hmm

AtomHeart Thu 13-Apr-17 16:32:25


ptumbi Thu 13-Apr-17 16:32:44

Seriously - why the hell are your feeling guilty? Serious question.

You are feeling guilty because your gardener is doing the job you pay him for, while the neighbour wants a 'while you're there' job done for him (for free, probably)???

I know I'm a mardy cow but I cannot fathom why on earth you are feeling guilty for saying no?

You should be feeling fucking annoyed that the neighbour is stopping your gardener from doing his job - your gardening!

AnnieAnoniMouse Thu 13-Apr-17 16:36:06

If anyone told me I was old, infirm & selfish they'd get the garden rake shoved up their backside. I wouldn't be wringing my hands, feeling guilty.

Tell your gardener not to feel obliged to do anything for the neighbour to 'keep the peace' & tell him he needn't be polite the next time the neighbour is being an irritating arse!

I'm sorry it's worried you, but seriously, stop now. Have a G&T whilst admiring your lovely tidy garden!

knackeredinyorkshire Thu 13-Apr-17 16:40:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

knackeredinyorkshire Thu 13-Apr-17 16:42:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Saucery Thu 13-Apr-17 16:42:59

You were not unreasonable in the least, don't waste any more of your time worrying that you were. If your neighbour wants the services of your gardener he can book and wait like any other customer.

blueskyinmarch Thu 13-Apr-17 16:43:54

There isn’t a problem with your neighbour wanting someone to cut his grass. My DH is fit and healthy but we get someone to cut the grass as we have loads and DH just can’t be assed doing it on top of the other gardening jobs. The issue here is the neighbours attitude. He is being a prize knobber.

DJBaggySmalls Thu 13-Apr-17 16:51:10

YANBU, stop feeling guilty. There are loads of gardeners in the paper, they aren't difficult to hire. It could be that your gardener doesn't like your neighbour and doesn't want to work for them. Its his choice.

Berthatydfil Thu 13-Apr-17 17:02:28

You need to say
Neighbour - I have paid gardener for x hours work in my garden/ to do z list of tasks. I have not paid him to spend y amount of time with you. If he finishes any task early I expect him to either start another task or refund any excess I have already paid, not to allow him to do work for other customers.
Your gardening arrangements are nothing to do with me and I insist you conduct any discussions with gardener about your requirements outside of the time I pay him for.
Good bye

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