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To remind you: DON'T cut bread rolls while holding them.

(61 Posts)
BertieBotts Fri 31-Mar-17 15:25:34

I have just spent five hours in an admittedly very lovely German hospital being sliced up and put back together.

On Monday of last week I decided to have a bread roll at work. I was cutting into it with a serrated table knife and I didn't realise the knife was sharper than the ones I have at home, and cut my little finger. Oh well, thought I, that's annoying, and held it under the tap, but it wouldn't stop bleeding, so I ran to get help. Some of the office staff patched me up but strongly suggested I go to hospital. They even wanted to call an ambulance but I said I'd prefer to go myself.

Anyway. In A&E. Quite a lot of blood at this point. DH hoiked out of his very important first day in a new job blush, starting to feel that the labour breathing exercises aren't really cutting it. They took me off straight away into an operating room cum corridor (was v odd), gave me some pain relief in a little cup and started trying to assess the damage. There was some concern that I couldn't move the finger independently and then they realised it was also entirely numb on one side.

I had managed to sever the artery, nerve and tendon... so they stitched me up, gave me a tetanus shot and sent me home with a note to go to the next doctor.

After lots of back and forth between various surgeons and a system I'm still not sure I understand, they sent me off to a company who make medical adaptation devices to get a special brace (which costs €600, thank God for health insurance!) and an anaesthetist for a lovely chat about whether I'd like general anaesthetic or an injection in the shoulder to numb my whole arm (I went for the general, I don't like needles) and here I am 11 days after the accident with a "bionic arm"... They've repaired the tendon, and done microscopic stitches in the nerve, apparently, which is quite fascinating, but something in the op seems to have disabled half the nerves on my ring finger too. Currently only allowed paracetamol and ibuprofen, which is not particularly effective, but takes the edge off.

I've cut rolls like this for years. I've never thought anything of it. I know technically you're supposed to do it on a flat surface but I always (thought) I was paying attention and it would be fine. Clearly not! So here is my reminder to you and your teenage DC: it only takes a second to find a flat surface to cut on. Please make sure you do it and don't end up like me shock I was thinking I hadn't done much damage as I hadn't hit bone, but it really is quite serious.

sonyaya Fri 31-Mar-17 15:32:59

Oh dear! Get well soon.

Chloe84 Fri 31-Mar-17 15:36:00

That made me feel weird in my stomach.

I'm guilty of chopping/cutting things like this. Won't be doing it again.

Wish you a speedy recovery OP and thanks for the warning flowers

BertrandRussell Fri 31-Mar-17 15:37:07

Oh you poor thing! You may (or may not!) be interested to know that old fashioned "posh" English manners say that you should never cut rolls, only break them. I wonder if this is why! I hope it heals really quickly and you're not the 6 million dollar woman for long....

Andrewofgg Fri 31-Mar-17 15:38:03

brew and make DH work his fingers to the bone . . . no, Andrew, that's not quite the phrase you want! Make him work himself to frazzle looking after you.

BertieBotts Fri 31-Mar-17 15:40:19

Yes, perhaps! Actually I do often break them, but I'd bought a slightly tougher wholemeal roll on that day. Perhaps another factor.

brexitstolemyfuture Fri 31-Mar-17 15:41:07

Oh my. What kind of knife was it? A ceramic?

BertieBotts Fri 31-Mar-17 15:42:59

Haha! Yes he is.

BertieBotts Fri 31-Mar-17 15:44:04

No! Just an ordinary table knife. I mean, it was serrated, it wasn't a butter knife, but it wasn't anything unusual.

BertieBotts Fri 31-Mar-17 15:45:01

Here in Germany they call them Frühstucksmesser, which means breakfast knife, they are designed for bread.

Valentine2 Fri 31-Mar-17 15:45:39

In the hazy sleeplessness of the newborn stage for my DC2, I once sliced the top of my finger though admittedly it wasn't as bad as yours.
I learnt I was a big hazard around my baby and needed rest. Now I know when to stop before reaching that state.
Get well soon. And thanks for the warning. smile

Hoppinggreen Fri 31-Mar-17 15:48:36

DH will be very very please when I tell him about this - he sites the ( admittedly Private) excellent healthcare system as another reason why we should move to Germany!!
Hope you get better soon OP

Crunchymum Fri 31-Mar-17 15:49:10

That made me feel weird in my stomach.

Exactly this!

Hope you are fully recovered soon and yep I cut my rolls on a breadboard.

yaela123 Fri 31-Mar-17 15:53:30

Ouch! Get well soon flowers

DontTouchTheMoustache Fri 31-Mar-17 15:55:54

I'm hyperventilating reading this...severe blood/artery phobia. My own fault as was quite clearly a thread about blood and such. I'm a fool.
Hope you feel better op

SquatBetty Fri 31-Mar-17 16:00:33

shock I hope your hand gets better soon! flowers

BertieBotts Fri 31-Mar-17 16:01:23

It's about 60% socialised, Valentine. I'm on state health insurance so I just pay a percentage out of my wages - sort of like an extra tax. Hardly ever have to pay out of pocket for anything. Sometimes €5-10 for a prescription. And glasses aren't covered, but aren't too expensive.

I have to say the care has been absolutely top notch. The biggest thing has been that the doctors and nurses have time. And it shows. It took me over 30 minutes to come around properly from my anaesthetic and I had a doctor with me the whole time just chatting about silly things to help me come to, he never made me feel like I was holding him up or he needed to be somewhere else. Everyone has taken time to explain what's happening to me, usually in English, and I've been given options and felt in control almost all of the time.

drummersmum Fri 31-Mar-17 16:02:10

I hope you're not a pianist.
I am guilty as hell, constantly cutting myself here and there. Thanks for the warning and get well soon

BertieBotts Fri 31-Mar-17 16:03:38

Sorry Moustache! blush

diddl Fri 31-Mar-17 16:04:35


I almost always cut my Brötchenwink that way.

Hope you're feeling better soon.

Prometheus Fri 31-Mar-17 16:04:55

I did similar when I was 16, tried to split frozen beef burgers with a sharp knife. Burgers weren't as frozen as I thought and I severed the tendon in my little finger. Lost all movement in it to this day. No lovely German hospital though, just crappy local hospital where A&E told me to stem the flow of blood and bugger off.

MuffinMaiden Fri 31-Mar-17 16:06:02

I constantly tell my brother this, maybe I'll show him this thread. I still catch him doing it when I visit him!

BertieBotts Fri 31-Mar-17 16:06:52

No but I play guitar sad Not at the moment, clearly!

danTDM Fri 31-Mar-17 16:07:00

uggh! flowers get better soon!

WaegukSaram Fri 31-Mar-17 16:08:07

The same scenario happened to me in Vienna while travelling! But not as serious as yours.

Fifteen years later I have a long, thin scar and my middle finger is almost completely numb.

Damn bread rolls.

Hope you feel better soon and you're not in too much pain.

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