AIBU to be so irritated by my office colleague

[CeciledeVolanges]

I haven't been getting much sleep recently, I'm really under the weather so that may be why I'm irritable. I normally get on well with the person I share an office with personally, but she is constantly muttering to herself, sniffing, clearing her throat, shuffling about, eating crisps, I can't concentrate and as I've been putting up with it for over a month I don't know what to say. I'm honestly on the verge of tears.

[CeciledeVolanges]

Also sighing with her lips pursed, if that makes sense. I know this makes me an awful person but I can't stand it!

[Uiscebeatha85]

I had a colleague like this, I feel your pain. Earphones?

[CeciledeVolanges]

I'm not really supposed to have earphones in, and i just have cheap apple ones, not noise cancelling, so I can still hear

[Uiscebeatha85]

Can you book a meeting room for a couple of hours quiet time? Break might do you good

[CeciledeVolanges]

As soon as 5:30 rolled around yesterday I grabbed my laptop and took it to the library, which was absolute bliss, but I'm contracted to stay at my desk and I'm not senior enough to book rooms on my own behalf sadly

[CeciledeVolanges]

She also taps her feet, drums her fingers and drinks Diet Coke then audibly belches

[CeciledeVolanges]

I have to say this is cathartic even if mean

[NotAUserNumberSoNotATroll]

I have rage on your behalf - I hate having to listen to other people's "individual personality traits" someone stood behind me at work eating an apple for no apparent reason, I nearly punched him!

Can you practice some calming techniques at home and try to link them to a scent or particular music so you can use those at work to try and refocus?

[CeciledeVolanges]

She has been irritating me all this time, it really never stops, I just haven't said anything. I'm sorry, it normally stops me working but today I feel like punching something or bursting into tears, I can't stand it

[Jayfee]

perhaps some subtke comments might raise her awareness? when she sniffs say something like sounds like you have a cold etc?

[CeciledeVolanges]

When she clears her threat over and over again noisily I offer her a cough sweet but I can't say "BLOODY WELL COUGH"

[VladmirsPoutine]

Sorry if this is a silly question but why can't you just ask her to stop all this?
I genuinely think you should say something like "Hi Susan, your breathing, coughing, hawking up phlegm etc is really distracting and I'd like you to stop doing it."

[phoenixtherabbit]

I understand your frustration.

One of my colleagues used to really annoy me when I was pregnant. I couldn't stomach anything before lunchtime but she would eat a full on fucking greasy burger most days at 10:30am 😷😷😷

[CeciledeVolanges]

Vladimir it seems awfully rude and I don't want to offend her. Also it isn't really that she is doing something wrong.

[VladmirsPoutine]

If you're just after a moan I can certainly empathise. It is rage inducing. But I do think you should say something particularly if you get on well. This is something you're going to have to endure for a long time - it's not as if you were sitting next to her on a train for one journey and could just grin and bear it, this is your work life. Say something woman!

[Applebite]

Just wanted to sympathise. My office room mate is lovely, but for a tiny slim girl, she sneezes like a fucking 50 stone trucker. I have no idea where it comes from. But she does it explosively, out of the blue, about 5 times a day, and it gives me the rage.

I can't say anything, so getting it out here has helped... ahhhhhh!

YANBU to rant here. In fact, YWNBU to beat her to death with a hole punch, it's only fair.

[CeciledeVolanges]

Thank you for the sympathy.

[ShowMePotatoSalad]

Apple I wonder if I work in the office opposite you, because there's a woman who does this at my work, sneezes as loud as humanly possible, and it makes me jump out of my skin! So effing ANNOYING!!!

[2410ang]

Apple sorry I have just laughed long and hard, we have the same in our office which is open plan and never ceases to amaze me how such a loud noise can come from such a small person

Cecil have you tried foam earplugs to block out the worst of it? They are a godsend in our environment when you just want to block it all out and concentrate. If she asks why you're wearing them it might make the honest conversation a bit easier?

[IamFriedSpam]

Ohm god it's irritating me just reading about her! I do think you should say something politely for your own sanity. You could mention that you're easily distracted so you'd really appreciate it if she shuts the fuck up keeps the noise to a minimum.

[Applebite]

Haha why is it that such slight people make such loud noises? I am built like a peasant who can pick potatoes in a strong gale and yet my sneezes are really quiet and delicate!!

[Areyoufree]

Just spent five minutes trying to sigh with my lips pursed. My kids are highly annoyed, so maybe YANBU.

[Applebite]

Isn't that just whistling?!

[ArchNotImpudent]

She might not be aware she's doing it - have you tried responding in a polite way? Sniffing - offer tissues. Throat clearing/coughing - offer to fetch her a glass of water. Sighing - ask 'is everything OK?'. Belching - offer mints.