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AIBU?

To be annoyed when drivers stop to let each other out?

46 replies

CrohnicallyPregnant · 17/03/2017 16:10

To clarify- I'm talking about the scenario where the road is flowing quite happily but someone decides to slow right down or stop to let someone in/out of a side road. Or they haven't observed what's happening around and cause an obstruction rather than helping!

Twice today it has caused chaos that I got caught up in.

First one, road bends to the right but there is a junction at the corner. A car stopped to let someone in/out, but then no one started driving again because a learner was confused as to whether they were supposed to go or not. And just as someone did start to move, a motorbike overtook so the stalemate started again.

The other one, someone stopped to let a van out of a side road, but by stopping they obstructed temp traffic lights. The van couldn't pull out because of the queue for the temp lights so even once the lights turned green no one could move.

Anyway, AIBU to think that while it's nice and polite to leave side roads clear so someone can pull out if traffic is heavy, or if you are turning in to indicate and slow down early giving the other drivers plenty of time to react, you do need to consider what else is going on around you! And if someone doesn't pull out into a gap you created, you shrug and carry on (carefully) because there could be a good reason why they haven't pulled out?

To be annoyed when drivers stop to let each other out?
To be annoyed when drivers stop to let each other out?
OP posts:
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MaidOfStars · 17/03/2017 16:19

Blatant excuse for diagrams.

Anyway, the second scenario, why, when the lights turned green, could nobody move? The other lane proceeded as normal, van pulled into traffic, Silly Driver continued on, you had to wait momentarily while he and the car behind got out of your way. Chaos?

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LurkingHusband · 17/03/2017 16:20

"You should not yield right of way unexpectedly" - Highway code.

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welovepancakes · 17/03/2017 16:21

Not quite on topic, but I hate it when drivers stop to let children cross the road. I know they're trying to be helpful, but it encourages children to think it's OK to walk out in front of cars, instead of waiting until the traffic has passed

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BackforGood · 17/03/2017 16:22

Yes, YABU to be annoyed at drivers being kind / considerate to each other.
I don't really understand why everywhere was gridlocked in the 2nd diagram.

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Miniwookie · 17/03/2017 16:42

I'm guessing in the second diagram the road was reduced to a single lane after the traffic light so letting the driver out at the side road caused gridlock. Yanbu in those specific circumstances, but generally letting people out is courteous if it's safe to do so. (Yes I know the highway code says otherwise, but I'd never get off my drive in the morning if no one let me out!)

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Hillarious · 17/03/2017 16:52

Makes for a happier drive when people are courteous and let you in or out or you do the same. Makes for an even happier drive when people say thank you. Would rather err on the side of being courteous and letting people out and occasionally being accused of being a "silly driver".

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CrohnicallyPregnant · 17/03/2017 16:55

maid the temp traffic lights were in the road, one lane was coned off so once that light went green I couldn't move until the cars on the other side moved along a bit. Except the cars weren't moving along as a driver was waiting for the van, who couldn't pull out because of the traffic waiting at the temp lights...

I should have said, the temp lights are 2 way, the permanent lights are 4 way so the temp lights went green way before the perm ones did.

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Aeroflotgirl · 17/03/2017 16:59

Oh dear, these silly drivers, being curteous and nice for a change.

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CrohnicallyPregnant · 17/03/2017 16:59

Oh, and van was turning towards temp lights hence needing to wait for traffic at temp lights to move... thought I'd put the indicator on the diagram!

Hillarious but it wasn't courteous in this instance, that's what I'm saying. Silly driver feels all happy because they've done something 'nice' when if they had observed what was going off around they would have realised they were causing a problem, not solving it.

OP posts:
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Genvonklinkerhoffen · 17/03/2017 17:02

It's annoying when the car in front stops to let someone out despite you being the last car in the queue. Almost as if they can't look that far back in their mirrors to see if they just keep going on their own merry way, the car will be out momentarily without all the light flashing and so on and braking etc.

But then I follow cars all the time where the driver clearly doesn't use their mirrors because you can see them pointed at the roof or the passenger seat head rest. Bonkers.

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NavyandWhite · 17/03/2017 17:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GallicosCats · 17/03/2017 17:10

My dear departed DF had a word for this sort of traffic-disrupting 'courtesy': Pollite Ness. Smile

Letting cars out can be a good idea when the traffic is already very slow-moving - we do it a lot on the school run down our way and it really helps keep traffic flowing - but it's another matter when things are moving well and there's already plenty of gaps.

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QueenInsomnia · 17/03/2017 17:19

I let cars out of side roads quite a lot actually. To be fair though I like to leave a nice distance between me and the car in front, so have plenty of time to signal for them to come out without causing an obstruction. Sometimes I do cause a slight obstruction (if the road is particularly busy and the driver takes a long while to pull out), because otherwise those cars will never get let out (knowing from experience of waiting far too long). Il never slam on my breaks though, or cause gridlock traffic to let them out. I think it's just common curtesy to let cars out.

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harderandharder2breathe · 17/03/2017 17:20

Not surprising learners get confused when they're taught not to signal anyone to come out etc

If the van can't pull out the driver who was letting them out should move when their light goes green, not fanny about waiting for someone who couldn't go anywhere.

I can see why people do it especially if it's a tricky junction but they shouldn't disrupt the flow of traffic to do so and if the car they're letting out doesn't move they should just carry on as normal

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Valentine2 · 17/03/2017 17:22

YABU. It's common courtesy to do it. I always tell myself that I wouldn't become Lord Sugar in those few seconds I give to others this way.

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BitOutOfPractice · 17/03/2017 17:27

Not exactly "chaos" is it?

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Approximateh0usewife · 17/03/2017 17:27

I get your point and while im all for lettig drivers in and out where appropriate it is definitely irritating when driving kindness backfires in that knock on effect way.

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RTKangaMummy · 17/03/2017 17:30

Deffo brill use of diagrams OP Smile

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welovepancakes · 17/03/2017 18:07

I stop when I can when I see children trying to cross. Why wouldn't you? I'd rather stop and let them cross safely than them trying to hedge their bet and run across a busy road

I know it's kindly meant, but it's far better for the child to learn to wait until it's safe to cross, rather than letting them think that they have right of way and cars will stop for them

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Meekonsandwich · 17/03/2017 18:39

You definitely should never stop to let someone cross unless it's at lights or a crossing, because the car behind may over take, or a car Comes racing the other way and they get hit or stuck in the middle of the road.
Never ever ever ever wave someone across the road because if the above happens its directly your fault. You encouraged them

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TheNaze73 · 17/03/2017 19:06

Are you trying to provoke some kind of reaction? Of course YABU but, nice diagrams

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twoforluck · 17/03/2017 19:19

I learnt to drive recently and my instructor said that's it's quiet dangerous to stop to let people out or especially to let people cross the road as other cars can coming from other directions and will not be expecting to have to stop, so can cause an accident iyswim. This has also happened to me as a pedestrian and I was nearly run over as I was so focused on thanking the car that had stopped that I didn't look the other way! Learnt my lesson there!

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SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower · 17/03/2017 19:24

In the second one isn't it just a case of leaving the junction clear?

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Oblomov17 · 17/03/2017 19:25

Nice diagrams!!
But I totally disagree.
Yes to letting people out.
Yes to letting children cross.

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NavyandWhite · 17/03/2017 19:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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