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AIBU To not want to take parcels?

(135 Posts)
moonbeamdream Thu 09-Mar-17 20:16:11

I'm currently on maternity leave hence I'm home a lot more than usual at the moment.

Usually I don't mind taking parcels for neighbours, but the last week we have taken at least 2 parcels a day for various neighbours. The neighbours to our left usually get home from work between 4-10pm, the lady next door always arrives home before her partner but he's always sent to collect said parcels from us. Most of the parcels we have taken have been for these neighbours.

At the moment I have four parcels in my porch, and tonight I just thought to myself why should I take parcels for the whole street when only a couple of neighbours take them for us?

AIBU do you not want to take parcel to anybody any more? Part from those that take them for us obviously. I always try and be neighbourly but this is getting beyond a joke. Even the post lady has commented that we are the only house that seems to take everyone's parcels. She even tries to use alternative neighbours as she understands it must be annoying, I think partly it's because I would like it if a neighbour took a parcel for me.

How do I say no if somebody tries to deliver a parcel for neighbour? I know it's easy to just say no but sometimes it's quite hard if that makes sense?

Sorry for such a long post about such a trivial problemgrin

reallyanotherone Thu 09-Mar-17 20:21:43

I'm similar smile

I am actually debating if i could make some sort of business out of it. Pay me a subscription and i'll take all your parcels smile

bigmouthstrikesagain Thu 09-Mar-17 20:23:04

If you are around a lot why do you need your neighbours to take your parcels? If you don't want to accept parcels anymore why not refuse next time you are asked?

Answer those questions and you will know how you feel and what you want to do. You don't need validation from strangers - do what you think is right.

Chloe84 Thu 09-Mar-17 20:25:12

YANBU. More than once or twice a week is annoying. Just say you won't be around so neighbours won't get their parcel if you take it.

Do the neighbours collect the parcels themselves?

mollymaid16 Thu 09-Mar-17 20:25:29

Next time a parcel comes day you can't take it as your going to be away for a few days and the neighbours el y be able to get them

museumum Thu 09-Mar-17 20:27:02

What is it bothers you about it? If the neighbours collect too late then tell them.
If it's answering to the delivery in the first place saying no might not stop them trying in future anyway. Drivers are under a lot of pressure to deliver.

AnotherEmma Thu 09-Mar-17 20:27:42

DH works from home and we often get parcels from neighbours that they don't bother collecting for days. They clutter up our hallway which is small and cramped anyway.
I don't mind if it's an occasional thing but when people do it regular I think it takes the piss. They should make alternative arrangements - get parcels delivered to their workplace or one of those "collect plus" type locations (corner shops etc).

AnotherEmma Thu 09-Mar-17 20:29:12


Pemba Thu 09-Mar-17 20:29:56

For goodness sake, just refuse. If you keep taking them the delivery people will assume you are happy about it.

Or just don't answer the door if you can see it's a delivery, and you're not expecting anything yourself. Or if you don't want to actually say the words then put a sign up 'only parcels for this address please' or something like that. I did similar (in reverse) recently asking that parcels be left in my safe place, not with neighbours, and it has worked like a charm.

mollymaid16 Thu 09-Mar-17 20:30:44

I've the opposite problem my nosey neighbours always takes my packages in and I've told her many times not to take them as I don't like it and she still takes them

I've even wrote on the notes do not deliver up neighbours and they still do it

So I do the click and collect now

Notapissingcontest Thu 09-Mar-17 20:31:34

I would have no problem taking in the parcels. Yabu.

theworriedone Thu 09-Mar-17 20:32:30

I used to take in parcels for a neighbour, I wasn't overly bothered but didn't say I was happy to do it to the neighbour.

However the day I stopped was the day a parcel was delivered with a note attached to say to deliver straight to me! shockhmm

Bloosh Thu 09-Mar-17 20:35:13

I just say no. What bothers me museomumis that I have to answer the door which is an interruption, have a parcel in my narrow hallway, then have to answer the door to the neighbour (another interruption), or - more often - go round and deliver it. I work from home and also have to deal with cold callers at the door and on the phone.

we get the same regular couriers so once they know you are here they come round a lot.

But I live in a terrace so have lots of neighbours. If I had a big detached house with a large porch I'd be fine with it because it would be occasional. Round here it's probably daily - or would be if I didn't refuse most of the time.

Mulberry72 Thu 09-Mar-17 20:35:45

I'm at home a lot at the moment, and I only take parcels for my neighbours on each side because they take parcels in for us. I got tired of taking parcels in for others and them leaving things here for days. YANBU.

Lazyafternoon Thu 09-Mar-17 20:37:09

YABU - unless it's actually causing you an inconvenience. We had a parcel, a big box, delivered here for next door. It was massive! I can understand the delivery man didn't want to shlep it back to van when could reach our door bell from where he was! I can't get the buggy passed it in the hall way!

But the neighbour was very grateful. He's taken parcels for us (and will even bring them round rather than wait for me to go to them) and is a friendly, nice family. Plus, at the end of the day, it was only half a day of very mild inconvenience for doing a nice thing.

Oh, and it's great way to make friends (or just get to recognise or get on nodding terms!) with your neighbours by being friendly, saying hello, doing a good dead and having a chat when you hand over parcels! But then I like the idea of knowing my neighbours so will make the effort.

moonbeamdream Thu 09-Mar-17 20:40:37

We have a small porch area and the fact that they clutter the place up is annoying. Next door sometimes take several days to collect their things, it's not always easy to take things to them when it's a huge box and your newborn won't be put downsmile

When I go back to work or take DC out for the day would be when I may miss a delivery.

The idea of drivers just trying to do their job and the fact they are under pressure to deliver is why I try be helpful I guess?

I have to say no so they get the idea I guess hmm

Pemba Thu 09-Mar-17 21:00:16

The sign is the best thing, honestly (I know it's a pain to have to make one). Because you can keep refusing, and this is a good idea, BUT you will always get new delivery drivers who don't know you're not keen, and they WILL try your door if they think someone's in.

thenewaveragebear1983 Thu 09-Mar-17 21:00:26

Just say no to the delivery driver. They will just go and knock another door. They're not going to write on the card 'left at 28 because lady in 26 said she's tired of taking your parcels in'

I sometimes say no if I know we're going to be out for the evening for example. Someone took a parcel in for me once on the day they left to go on holiday for two weeks. Was v annoying.

sonyaya Thu 09-Mar-17 21:12:07

I hate the whole thing. I don't like taking parcels. But I also cannot stand it when my parcels are delivered to neighbours. I hate having to go round and get them.

The reason for this is I find it hard to give someone their parcel without having a neighbourly chat and inviting them in for tea. Likewise I am always invited in and don't feel I can say no without being rude. That sounds anti social but after a shit day at work I just want to get in an flop.

Just send it to the bloody sorting office.

TheCatsWhiskers Thu 09-Mar-17 21:16:51

Just say no, the neighbours will never know.

TheJWoman Thu 09-Mar-17 21:19:16

Our neighbours are always taking parcels in for us as the deliver drivers seem to have a knack of missing us - I am mortified that they've had to do it so often, and I've often said to them that they can refuse it if they want to, but they seem happy to take them in. I would have no problem if they ever stopped.

If you don't want to take parcels in, don't. You don't need to give any explanation to the delivery driver, you just need to say, "No, I can't." and they'll try someone else.

MadisonAvenue Thu 09-Mar-17 21:26:14

Neighbours of ours have their own business which the run from home. They're getting deliveries four or five times a day but they also pop to McDonalds or go shopping or both go to pick the kids up from school which means that they're frequently out when parcels are delivered.

Now if I see a delivery van by their drive and get a knock on our door I don't answer. It just felt like they were taking the piss.

RainbowPastel Thu 09-Mar-17 22:31:45

I am a SAHM so end up taking everyone's parcels in. I don't mind if they come and pick them up the same day but it annoys me when I have to go knocking. Contrary to what one poster above said they do comment on who will take them in. They all call my next door neighbour a miserable sod as he just says no and shuts the door on the couriers.

littlefrog3 Thu 09-Mar-17 23:23:13


I don't like taking in parcels for my neighbours at ALL. Not being funny, but it's not my problem if the drivers are under pressure. It's not up to me to make their job easier. No-one does anything to make my job easier. And by the same token I don't expect anyone to take in my parcels either, and usually have them sent to argos for delivery, or tell the postie to put them in our garage.

As someone said above ^ I hate having to go to a neighbour's house to get any parcel, or for them to come to me, as you feel like you have to chat/offer coffee etc.

In addition, some years ago, I took something in that had been delivered from a certain catalogue, (for a neighbour who lived next door but one, who was a 'private let' tenant who had recently moved in.) They didn't come around for it, so after a day, I took it around to them. She said 'oh ta' and shut the door.

Long story short, some weeks later, I had a knock on the door from someone accusing me of stealing that item. (It was worth a couple of hundred.) I had signed for the bloody item, and the neighbour had denied receiving it! I couldn't prove I hadn't got it, and it caused me a LOT of bother. I knocked on the neighbour's door several times, and never got a reply, and on the one occasion DH caught her, (and confronted her,) she said I had never brought anything around to her!

Upshot is, I moved out of the area not long after, and left the 'bother' behind, and luckily it didn't follow me. But if I had carried on living there, heaven knows what would have happened.

So yeah, fuck it, I don't take anything in now. Most of the time, I don't answer the door, but on the occasions they catch me, I say 'sorry, I am going away for a week in about an hour, so I won't be here to give it to them...'


PickAChew Thu 09-Mar-17 23:30:44

I usually take parcels for neighbours who show good etiquette and do reciprocate, but I have turned down ones that are either very large or poorly wrapped.

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