Nearly 6 months ago my sister moved into my two bed apartment with me, and it started off well but then started to go downhill. Initially for the first couple of months I was doing everything - cleaning, tidying, cooking etc. She'd put on a wash but leave the clothes in the machine for days on end so they'd smell, leave her clothes in huge piles everywhere, so I'd end up putting them away - little irritants like that.
We agreed that she would pay £550 plus half of the quarterly gas and electric bill.
The problems started when she started taking my things (mainly shoes and clothes) without asking. I asked her a couple of times to please not do it and would either be met with "Fine OK, I won't do it again", or depending on her mood she would completely go OTT and start telling me to not be a bitch/so uptight etc. and that if I just let her do it, we wouldn't have to argue.
This went on for a few months and in between me paying more than her, me buying all the food shopping, me working two jobs, and her constantly having dramas I snapped and told her that her behaviour was really pissing me off, I was stressed and fed up and that if she's not just capable of respecting one thing I ask of her (not taking my things), I want her out.
She got really difficult and told me she wouldn't be moving out, she'd go when it suited her, and that if this was the way I was going to be, she would make my life as difficult as "I was making hers".
After that things settled down a bit, until she started wearing my things again. Between this other things happened - constant little dramas that aren't huge but the type of thing I just don't want to be living with every day. E.g. Her getting PG for the third time after not using contraception, again. She ended up in hospital with a MC for three days and I was the one who was there with her, stayed at the hospital until the small hours and then had to go to work on two hours sleep. At that time she didn't tell me she was PG, she told me she was in hospital because she had caught an STI. Other little things like her claiming she can't afford to buy us any food shopping but constantly getting taxis and going to the pub, going clothes shopping etc. are getting me down and starting to make me feel like she's just taking the piss.
She's paid rent late a couple of times and also took it upon herself to give me £50 less than what we agreed one month. When I asked her why she said because she doesn't feel she's getting a fair deal and that she knows I "don't need the money".
Another time she lost her purse while out on the piss so couldn't pay me.
I'm just feeling so fed up with the situation.
We had another talk and I told her that I'm not happy with the arrangement anymore and that because I'd like her to leave ASAP, she doesn't have to pay me rent while she looks for another place. It's been a month since then and she's still going to the pub and I also found a receipt for £98 from her clothes shop, so she's obviously now taking advantage of the fact that she's now got a place to live for free.
AIB utterly OTT here or would I be within my rights to tell her that she's got 4 weeks to move out or I'm just going to bag up her stuff and leave it outside? I'm so stressed ATM and just not happy at all.
AIBU?
To be so stressed by this situation
dontpushmybuttons · 21/02/2017 09:23
Thank you for the replies so far.
I'm finding this so stressful because I hate confrontation with her - she's really hard to talk to about issues. She either refuses to talk or kicks off.
She's not a bad person and she's always been a good sister to me but she's always been irresponsible and has always relied on others.
Parents live abroad so unfortunately that's not an option 
I dread bringing this subject up with her because each time it ends in tears and with me feeling guilty. I'm just fed up of being the one who the shit lands on.
I'm so angry reading all that!!
She's taking massive advantage of you! Don't let her do that to you anymore, please!!!
Kick her out, no matter how hard it'll be, how hard you cry, she needs to go through it to GROW.
She won't leave until you literally put her out, so do it. You're teaching her an important lesson and teaching her to take responsibility for herself and her life, so don't feel guilty, just do it.
for you!!!
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