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AIBU?

Leaving baby to go on holiday

68 replies

CostaAddict · 12/02/2017 17:59

We have booked to go to Florida for the 1st time this May. DH, me, DS1(7) & DS2 (8 months when we travel).

My mum has now offered to keep DS2 while we go as 1. It'll be 31degrees. 2. He won't get much enjoyment & will most likely spend a lot of time in a buggy. 3. We will get to spend one on one time with DS1 who has HFA and has had a really tough time with lots of hospital apps.

We would take my DSis who is 14 but gets on brilliantly with us and DS1.

We have considered leaving DS2 but now I'm feeling torn. He's not BF so practically I could leave him. Emotionally I'm struggling with it although I 100% trust my parents with the baby. They absolutely adore him and respect our parenting etc. I'm know I'll be judged by PILs about leaving him for 2 weeks though. AIBU?

OP posts:

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justlikekatycarr · 12/02/2017 18:01

I understand your reasoning but it does seem not quite cricket to me, sorry

frenchfancy · 12/02/2017 18:02

Normally I think parents should take their DCs on holiday with them, but in this case I think it would be better for all for him to stay with the GPs.

Cutesbabasmummy · 12/02/2017 18:02

I think he'll hate it but I couldn't leave my baby for two weeks even though he would be fine with my mum and dad. I am slightly wondering why you booked to go to Florid a in the first place with him?

BubbleWrapQueen · 12/02/2017 18:03

I'd do it. The big age gap means by the time DS2 is old enough to appreciate Disney he will most likely have a great time just the three of you. He will be spoilt rotten by grandparents, and you and your Dh will really enjoy the time with DS1. I would go for it.

NapQueen · 12/02/2017 18:03

I'm not sure if I could leave my little one for two weeks; but I agree the trip away without them will be much much better for your eldest and he can get a lot of focus. Two weeks in florida isn't a trip for a 2yo if it's theme parks all the time.

Can you take the littlest one to Disney land Paris or a similar toddler favourite type holiday at another point in the year?

PotteringAlong · 12/02/2017 18:03

I wouldn't leave him. Family holiday is a family holiday.

NapQueen · 12/02/2017 18:04

Tbh in hindsight I'd do Disney land Paris, take the 14yo sis and your mum too, and wait to do florida until the youngest is 7 and eldest is 12.

Oysterbabe · 12/02/2017 18:05

I couldn't leave my baby for 2 weeks.

Longdistance · 12/02/2017 18:06

Two weeks is too long. If it was say less than a week, maybe, but 2 weeks is too long.

Take him with you.

SparkleTwinkleGoldGlitter · 12/02/2017 18:06

I think it's fine to leave the baby behind. I would leave mine so me and dh could go away together

monkeyfacegrace · 12/02/2017 18:07

I wouldn't leave my baby for 2 whole weeks, sorry. Why on earth would you book Florida under the circumstances?

Can't you book a family holiday then do 4 days or so away with the older one?

Trifleorbust · 12/02/2017 18:07

I think I could do it if the baby had had stints of several days with the GPs and I knew he/she wouldn't get upset.

MixedGrill · 12/02/2017 18:07

I couldn't leave an 8 month old for two weeks.

He'll be fine in Florida.

If I could afford it I would take your Mum to look after him a few days while you're there.

AuntiePenguin · 12/02/2017 18:08

That's a really bad time to leave him, as 8 months is the classic time for separation anxiety. I'm sure you'll have experience of that from your DS1. When my eldest was 8 months he would literally scream if I was out of the room for one minute, and that lasted for several weeks.

So it might be fine, or it might be very distressing for him and very difficult for your parents to manage.

Would it be an option for your parents to go with you to look after him? Or would your sister be able to help with him so you can have more time with your eldest?

CostaAddict · 12/02/2017 18:09

I don't think I can leave him either. Honestly I feel awful for even considering it.

We looked at Florida for a long time before going. DS1 has spent years in & out of hospital and had 7 major ops. He's due another op in September as we had originally planned to October but moved it forward. We then found out I was pregnant with DS2 when we booked it and I stupidly didn't think. I am really regretting it although for DS1 I know he will love it.

OP posts:

ImperialBlether · 12/02/2017 18:10

No way would I leave my baby for two weeks. He'll have a much better time with you than with anyone else.

ProudBadMum · 12/02/2017 18:10

I'd live him. I left a 10 month old for a puss up 10 day holiday. He stayed with grandma. He's 7 now and has no idea.

Time away is healthy. On MN though people wouldn't leave an 18 year old home alone for a weekend.

Do what you feel is for the best not what internet strangers tell you

ImperialBlether · 12/02/2017 18:11

Why don't you go and then when you're there, take it in turns to go out with your older son in the daytime and all meet up in the late afternoon and spend the rest of the day together?

Theimpossiblegirl · 12/02/2017 18:11

You would miss him but he would be fine. The benefits to your other child are huge though, a family holiday without the baby- more hours at the parks, later nights, freedom to do what he wants to do. It isn't a decision you are taking lightly, it won't be easy, but I'd say go for it.

Another option could be to all go, and the GPs to have the baby with them most days, either in the younger bits of the park or at the hotel/villa, with a few whole family days included.

Blazedandconfused · 12/02/2017 18:13

Disneyland Paris. Bring your parents.

Pleasestoplickingthetv · 12/02/2017 18:14

2 weeks is a long time, and Florid is an awful long way away if you had to get back to him in an emergency.
Take him, but take turns spending some one on one time with DS1

Knittinglikemad · 12/02/2017 18:16

We are keeping our granddaughter for a week in June she will be 10mths while DD, SIL & GS go to Disneyland Paris, I don't see a problem, she will be spoiled rotten with us for the week & is used to staying for days at a time so I assume your little one is the same with your parents.

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gamerwidow · 12/02/2017 18:16

I'd leave him, he may be unsettled while you are not there but it won't do any lasting damage. You're leaving him with people who love him and who will care for him. I think you're eldest deserves to have the focus on him under the circumstances instead of everyone having to work around a baby's needs.

HopelesslydevotedtoGu · 12/02/2017 18:16

No I wouldn't. Your baby will miss you and not understand where you are. It will be confusing and worrying for baby.

Can you afford for your mum to come with you to help out?
Is there a babysitter/ nanny service at Disneyland?
Can you take turns with dh taking ds1 out in the park?

Astoria7974 · 12/02/2017 18:17

Really depends on the grandparents. If they're good caregivers for an 8 month old then fair enough, otherwise would just take with

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