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AIBU?

Do men just not wash their hands after using the toilet?

94 replies

Zumbumba · 17/01/2017 13:50

I'm so fed up. We've had several workmen in the house over the past few months, a delivery man and several of DH's friends - all of them used our toilet and didn't wash their hands after. AIBU to find this totally disgusting and unhygienic?! Why are there so many people who skip this step? Don't they feel unclean?

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SparkleShinyGlitter · 17/01/2017 13:53

How do you know they didn't wash there hands? Do you stand listening in for the tap to run?

I have very sensitive skin and get bad eczema on my hands with a lot of soaps. I often don't wash my hands when I'm out I make do with sensitive aloe Vera hand wipes and wash them with a my soap once home as that is ok for me to use. I haven't died of germs yet

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reallyanotherone · 17/01/2017 13:55

Yes, how do you know they don't wash hands, is your sink in a different part of the house?

How do you know your female visitors do?

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wasonthelist · 17/01/2017 13:55

Correct. No men ever wash their hands ever.

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flamencina · 17/01/2017 13:57

I think it's worse for men to not do it. They actually touch their penis while peeing. For women it is possible to use the toilet without genital contact if you use a thick enough wad of paper. Still grotty because of touching flush, door handles etc obviously but slightly more excusable than men not doing it.

And given how quickly they go in and out of toilets I reckon a fair few don't bother. Some are a matter of seconds - literally just long enough to whack it out, whizz and zip up again.

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girlywhirly · 17/01/2017 13:59

YANBU, it is unhygienic. At DH'S work, he often sees men walk out of the Gents without washing their hands, even after a poo, and regardless of the notices instructing them to wash. They are also incapable of cleaning the toilet pan if they've made a mess.

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chemenger · 17/01/2017 14:00

Some data - I work in a male dominated part of a university. For a time our corridor had around 16 men and 4 women. The soap in the ladies toilet was filled about three times more often than the soap in the mens. So some of them do wash their hands some of the time (or they go to the toilet much less frequently than women or they use much less soap when they wash their hands).

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bummymummy77 · 17/01/2017 14:01

Dh did a shit the other day and didn't wash his hands. Wtf???? AngrySadConfusedShock

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TheNaze73 · 17/01/2017 14:23

Huge generalisation

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Zumbumba · 17/01/2017 16:17

Of course it's a generalisation! Surely you don't think I mean every single man!

And no I certainly don't listen for a running tap but our house is small enough to hear the only toilet flush and then see someone leave the toilet. Or I've used it straight after someone else and noticed the sink is dry.

I appreciate that some people may have sensitive skin but my point is that it seems to be a lot of people who don't do this (i.e. Not just people with sensitive skin), and for the implied criticism of sexism from a pp, actually I haven't noticed this with women, although of course there must be many who don't too, it just doesn't seem to be the same issue.

It really bothers me in my own home but I don't know how to communicate it. I don't feel I can't ask a guest to wash their hands but it makes me so uncomfortable when they then touch things etc knowing their hands aren't clean.

And no, I didn't suggest anyone would die from germs but handwashjng is clearly important to prevent germs spreading, especially fecal matter that collects in a bathroom, however clean you keep it. I don't think it's unreasonable to expect basic hygiene, I just can't believe how often I'm seeing it skipped.

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Zumbumba · 17/01/2017 16:19

I clearly have too much time on my hands to think about this! Sorry for long post!

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MummyToThree479 · 17/01/2017 16:21

Fuck me you really do have too much time on your hands! How can one feel so strongly about hand washing

I am very much a women and when out I often use hand gel instead of washing my hands. I always wash my hands when I get home though.

Maybe the men you've experienced sit down to pee so they don't touch them cock?
Maybe they don't like your soap?
Maybe you use don't hear the tap?

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EmmaWoodlouse · 17/01/2017 16:29

Some men do, some men don't.

Some women do, some women don't.

Not sure why touching a penis makes it so much worse as pee is sterile.

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MeadowHay · 17/01/2017 16:38

Mummy Everyone should feel so strongly about hand washing! You pass on diseases if you don't wash your hands and not just to yourself, to other people that you come into contact with as well, it's disgusting, irresponsible and selfish!! That idea that it would be acceptable not to wash your hands because you "dont like someones soap" is ludicrous Confused.

OP, more men don't wash their hands than women I think. This is through my observations but mostly through what my DH/dad etc have told me about observing other men in public toilets/workplace/school etc. It's so gross. If my DH didn't wash his hands after peeing it would be a dealbreaker, bleurgh.

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pasanda · 17/01/2017 16:43

My dh doesn't wash his hands after taking a shit Shock

I absolutely hate it about him but he is so arrogant to think it doesn't matter and gets pissed off with me when I try and have a go about it, like I'm the unreasonable one for daring to suggest it! Like it's an unusual thing to do.

Angry

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DrizzleHair · 17/01/2017 16:43

I'm a woman and I rarely wash my hands after the loo. Normally after a poo but only after a wee if I'm out in public with DD. I don't remind her to wash her hands after a wee either, only a poo (whether she's wiped or not)

I don't think all the endless soap is good for skin and I'd rather take my chances with the wee wee germs.

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LostSight · 17/01/2017 16:44

I too find it a bit grim. It isn't just men. I've seen women leaving public toilets washing. Regardless of skin conditions, I still find it disturbing anyone can do that.

The penis probably isn't as dirty as the fingers of someone who has picked their nose. It's not contaminated with poo germs. I have sometimes wished I was a man, so I could use a urinal and wouldn't have to touch anything other than myself in a public toilet.

Do you use public transport? Do you touch things in shops? Lots of other people have touched them as well. Some of them will have dirty hands. Do you get ill every time you go out? Most of us don't. So long as you are careful with your own personal hygiene, you are unlikely to catch anything.

I understand, it's nasty in your own house, but they won't be there forever. In the meantime, you could disinfect the door handles, once they all go home for the day, if it bothers you. Or maybe just go out when they are there. Out of sight is out of mind, or so they say.

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Pinkheart5915 · 17/01/2017 16:44

I couldn't tell you if people that use my toilet wash there hands, I take no notice and if I'm honest I don't care.

I get very dry hands, worse in winter and they will crack/bleed in washed too often or in certain soaps. So when out I don't always wash my hands but they are always given a wash with my safe hand wash once I'm home. I also won't use a soap if it's lavender for example as that makes me heave.
So maybe that makes me irresponsible and selfish as pp says Confused but I'd rather that than cracked bleeding hands thanks!

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LostSight · 17/01/2017 16:45

*without washing....

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user1471448556 · 17/01/2017 16:46

Most hand gels do not kill viruses, so if you're relying on those when using public loos then you're potentially exposing yourself to flu and norovirus. Tbh, if a man pees at a urinal that does not require him to touch any flush handle then I guess it's not overly problematic if he doesn't wash his hands BUT if he uses a loo for a pee and then flushes he will have fecal material on his hands from previous users who wiped their arses before flushing - he then spreads this all over the door handle and wherever else he chooses to place his rank hands. And if you think bog roll protects you from fecal material - have a look at scientific studies that show how much fecal material gets onto your hands even when you wipe with a thick wodge. And for anyone who poos and doesn't wash their hands - that is gross and it's no wonder d and v bugs spread so far and wide with that kind of behaviour.

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pasanda · 17/01/2017 16:46

For those of you that don't wash, is this mainly after a pee though? I always thought my dh was the only person in the world who never washes his hands after a poo.

Angry

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LostSight · 17/01/2017 16:47

Typhoid Mary didn't believe in hand-washing either. Her peach ice-cream was to die for, apparently!

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ShesAStar · 17/01/2017 16:48

The scuzzy ones don't

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CockacidalManiac · 17/01/2017 16:54

This man always washes his hands

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akkakk · 17/01/2017 16:55

two boys went into the public loos together - one from Eton, one from Harrow...

they both had a pee, afterwards the Etonian washed his hands, but the Harrovian didn't...

amazed, and condescendingly the Etonian challenged him - "we are taught at Eton to wash our hands after peeing..."

ahhh said the Harrovian - "at Harrow we are taught not to pee on our hands" :)


swap Eton and Harrow with any two other institutions as you like!

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bummymummy77 · 17/01/2017 17:00

I can't believe some people think hand washing after poos especially isn't important!!

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